I've always wanted to be happy, I mean everyone wants to be happy
No likes the festering sadness that bubbles within
No one likes sleepless nights
Not unless they are spent with a lover or a friend you never want to shut up
No one likes sleepless nights
But here they come again

Consistently questioning myself but not my worth

I find myself being more and more drawn in
Being awakened yet being so **** asleep
And realising that in this space
In this hole I dug and named holy
That nothing makes sense
And that I've been planting flowers for years in this hole with the hope something might grow
But it never has
Instead it remains destitute and putrid
It remains destitute and putrid

My boy cinnamon was brave
But he wasn't enough

You were wrapped in enticing packaging
Your name scripted in a luscious gold
Your picture proudly in front showing me what could be mine if I just opened the packet and took a bite
Yet I failed to read your ingredients
Of which hate and bitterness were the most previlent

I sang a song that was never mine to sing
And you wrote a story that was never yours to write
We were both thieves
But you were more skilled
Because while you stole my heart
I was incapable of even touching yours

So many cords..
All tangled.
This was you
And I didn't know where to start from to set you free

The moon turned it's eye when we hid to kiss
While the sun would blare it's rays in a dance for us
And how the stars would applaud when we made love

I have made a home in your home
But only because you took me away from mine

I've been sprouting
Trying to lift myself from the ground

I've been trampled on
And I have lost leaves

But I'm still sprouting
Lifting myself from the ground

My soil is craving revenge
Yet I should be happy

I want to be whole again
And the hate eating me inside is stopping that

You ****** out the nectar I gathered for years
And now that my sweet scent is gone
You found another flower

Your lips are like poison
Yet I pull you closer
Blackening my soul in the process

I was lucky enough to capture the sun in my hands
But as it's light seeped through my fingers

Only then did they complain it was too bright
Because I held it
But I refused to let it go
So they beat me

Until my sun kissed skin was a map of bruises
That led to the sun still in my hands

African woman,
It always seems as though you were defeated from the day you were born

As though you were born silent
Born with weaker bones
Born with weaker souls

But they lied.
You have not been defeated my Queens
Your voice echoes through your kingdoms
Your bones are firm and do not waver when they sink into the soil
And your souls, how vibrant they are
And how blinding they can be

Oh African girl
African woman,
You are more than the stars between your legs

Oh African girl
African woman,
You are more than moons that lay atop your chests

African girl
African woman,
Oh won't you believe me?
When I tell you that those curves are not all that makes you?

That your broad or small hips are not what writes your story
Oh African girl
African woman,
Carry a pen or take your finger and write your story

His hands were to be strong enough to carry us both
But how bruised and battered were his hands
How broken were his fingers
And where were his nails?

But he was told he needed to be stronger,  
To carry me even when his hands were broken
But they forgot I could walk
And I could lift him with me

He was wild and feral
But in love was I

With his golden hair and glistening eyes

His sharp teeth and claws feared me not

But his untamed heart did

She was made of pixie dust
And sang the tune of neverland

Oh how sweet was she?
To entice me with her wings

They sparkled under the moons light
And I was but a red headed boy that fell for her magic

Days that are gone
Are counted more than the days that are here

My world is full of stars
So they tell me it's too bright

Don't be scared to do
Don't be scared to be

A chocolate river is what they see me as
Enticing enough to dip a toe
But not beautiful enough to dive into

They say that my hair is a trap
A nest that is thick,
And they are right
It has curls that suffocates the smallest of minds

Woman,
Your hands are meant to cook
Or so they tell me

Woman,
Your back is meant to bear a child
Or so they tell me

Woman,
Your body is meant to satisfy
Or so they tell me

Woman,
Your lips are meant to be silent
Or so they tell me

But Woman,
You are so much more
I tell myself

Woman,
Your hands make so much more than just "good food"
I tell myself

Woman,
Your mind, your soul is intricate your thoughts matter
I tell myself

Woman,
You can build or you can destroy
What you are depends on only you
I continue to tell myself

You broke my heart
And there was blood everywhere
So I tried to wash it all away with alcohol
But that just made me a little too drunk

Sofia had a favourite bunny
His name was Mr spice and he was cuddly

If Sofia was near or far
Mr spice was always with her

Mr spice had a pink nose and was incredibly white
He had soft fur with eyes incredibly bright

Sofia loved Mr spice so much so
That she would hug him tight and not let him go

Sofia found magic so pure
She would open her palms and out it would pour

She would wiggle her little fingers up and down
And in an instant create a golden crown!

Sofia found magic so pure
And she knew it came from her for sure!

Sofia liked to play ball
She would hit small and big ones and hit them all

She would kick with all her might
Often giving the goalie a little fright

She would run and run
And sweat until her day was done

Sofia liked to play ball
She loved to hit them all

Sofia had popsicles in her hair
They were sticky but she did not care

She was not worried they turned her hair red
But looked happily in the mirror instead

Sofia liked her new coloured hair
She had many popsicles, some here and some there

But as the sun was growing taller and stronger
The popsicles were frozen no longer

So Sofia had to say goodbye to her sticky friends
As a long summer day came to an end

Everyone has different stars
It is easy to get so blinded by another's
That you can't see your own

You can love my physical attributes
But if you have no love to give my soul...............

Our love was so big
I could scarcely fit it in my heart

She moved like the waves
But looked like the sun

Beautiful flowers may grow here
                  But it is a wasteland without you

The words will come
At the dead of night
Did you not see!
They passed your sight!

You say my words are too deep
But only because yours were too shallow to make me float

You were used to straight and paved roads
So when you met me
A dirt road with so many turns and bumps
You panicked with no map to guide you

Sometimes I hide within myself
Within the folds of my soul
But then you coax me out gently
And I have to say I have never felt so alive

Take your journey with a pen

Take your journey with a pen

I was like a book you pulled from a library shelf
You read me
Studied me
From cover to cover
But when it was time for you to leave
You replaced me back on the shelf and went on your way

I crane my head to look at your beauty
But you have moved away
Why do you flee oh beautiful cloud
I am here waiting to capture you within my eyes

My hair is made of flowers
Yet they tell me I am not pretty enough
My skin is made of honey
Yet they tell me I am not sweet enough
Clouds linger in my eyes
Yet they tell me I do not dream
And in these moments I realise no matter how whole I am, for some I will never be enough

A little late night
A little lost hope
A little dark magic
And then a lost soul

They said not to look
But I did and found love

Do not find a river yet use spit to bathe

When my words escape my lips and find yours,
That is where  I know we are meant to be

One tree does not make a forest
Neither does one grain of sand make a desert