I only tugged upon your silken curls
to remind you I was here
Intruding upon your salacious thoughts
your growling response
is nothing I fear
There is no singular thought
the plural is obtainable
Come! Let me melt upon you
Let the elusive mutuality
be equably available
I want you to be one with me
en mass and piled high
Like the stars of the universe
tripping over each other,
to lay down upon the sky
Like a song with a central verse
weaving choruses into forever
that single tug upon silken curls
is a reminder we are in this together

your fingertips trace the curve of my cheeks, across my jaw
to my lips, down my throat and along my shoulder, skimming
my ribs until I shudder, crossing hollows, dipping into silken
valleys of skin only to return to my face to discover the rain

because we never said goodbye
the end was utterly relentless

I've got no one to see these tears
any one who cares to wipe them away
I'm afraid they'll just drip down
from my eyes and I'll simply drown
because I don't know who to talk to
If I had a friend I might be able to call
I'd struggle with what to say to them
Sure, I've got family, with their own problems
who would only want to say
You'll be okay, it's alright
I don't really know what to say
I just cry and cry and cry
the tears won't stop falling
they're like Winters hug
and Summers kiss
they fall hard and fast
until they are just mist
that glass my eyes
just a hint of sadness
that people find easy to ignore
but they continue to fall
while I wipe them away
they fall silently and blindly
to those that look away
but yeah, if I had someone
to talk to...
The tears would burn less
like acid and maybe, just maybe
they would evaporate
and go away...

Come unto to us
as you promised
yet you hide

Step up, be a Man
your absence
is damaged pride

Bring forth your rapture
Shower the Earth
in Heavenly Rain

Or else step back
and return to Myth
in disdain

Don't preach to me
in fairy tales
drowning in contradictions

Come unto us

I Wish to God

to be free
of this affliction

Once it was a place of sorrow
where bathing came from hot tears
warmth barely came from Tomorrow
little thought was give to more years

Where eating was swallowing a truth
that was just sawdust coated in lies
Mirrors simply reflected angry youth
all seen through drug clouded eyes

Upon a bed of razor sharp intentions
She painted a heart upon her chest
from the blood that flowed in rivulets
in the indentations of her weakness
She sighed that she did her best

She found herself upon silvery shores
under an incandescent Sun
hoping that she had evaded the laws
condemning her for what she had done

Head thrown back in a field of dreams
Serenity in her tumultuous gaze
Lips curved gently against the screams
so much clarity in a languid daze

She gently caressed coloured flowers
with hands that had never sought to protect
from the constantly brutal storm showers
that raged when she failed to connect

Where once there was only rain
all she could now feel was dry
Where once she was warped by pain
utter tranquility she could not deny

She rebuilt herself in a different place
in a skin that was as hardened as stone
Where her demons could find no trace
far away from all she had known

Standing by, about 10pm
a stranger stood next to me
asked me, from sideways lips
"Did you ever expect this is where we would meet?"
"Nope" I said to the stranger by my side
"I expected no one to come along"
Not interested in a conversation
uncaring where others belong
"Do you think there may be a reason?"
the stranger asks with a sigh
"Nope, not even interested"
as the trains arrival caught my eye
"Oh there's a purpose for my being here"
the stranger tenses muscles that flex and pulse
The train drew near and out of fear
I begged the stranger to get lost
"Leave me alone, I'm going home"
and prepare to depart for the train
that had not quite arrived at the station
no stranger would I permit me to detain
A stranger on a platform held out his hand
and stopped me from stepping onto the tracks
His last words to me as I sprawled on the platform...
"Some actions performed can never be taken back"

I left you
seven hundred miles ago
with a note that read,

I'm done with this ****

you should have known

when you woke up upon sheets
that were soaked with our final weeks, and you realised, that you woke alone, it wasn't just a joke,
that one thing should have made you know,

seven hundred miles later,
your bare *** is alone...

you should have known

and now I'm down the highway
seven hundred miles away
from you
checking out the sunset
wondering if you
see it
as blue as I do
are you seeing the splintering
and fracturing of the lightening
that splits between clouds
of such a perfect grey?

Do you even remember that day?

I do!

you should have known

how the ventricles in your heart
clip clop at such a slow pace
how the neurones that fire
within your brain
stitch together memories
so laconically

you should have known

that seven hundred miles
down the road
I was going to be more open
More free to be me
Less inclined to practice
this inhumanly farce

Seven hundred miles ago

You should have known

*It was never going to last

maybe? the apple of your eye?
the exhaled breath, you held?
a gratuitous golden sigh?

I could be the paint that dried
that you so intently watched
or the grass that is greener
on the other side
except you never jumped the fence
I'm just a skirt you tossed

I wish I was a lone fish
in the bowl of busy life
except wishes are fishes to you
so industriously multiplying

How about,
*I'm your wife?

love, love, love, love, love, love
an endless litany
It forms the rope
that hangs
love lost, love found
love that just
hangs around
Love
the bards sang!
Love
the poets wept
nursing broken bones
Love
the tired sheep bleat
love, love, love, love, love, love
so endless is the night
without it
so heartbreaking to live
without it
so cutting can it be
so masochistic
don't you see?
love, love, love, love, love, love
if you don't have it
you uninvited it
continually writing
about it
brings it back
*not one bit

Read a poem about anti bullying online
Noted the writer wanted to be impartial
Pointing out those that continued their assault would be dealt with
by 'serious' threats all of their own

When called out they disappeared....
All. On. Their. Own.

Met a couple of Daily plagiaristic personas
It was a shock to see two in a row

One disappeared with little to no fuss
(It is nice when the trash takes itself out)
The other continually claims what they don't own...
Deleting comments but hopefully suffering guilt, no doubt!

There's been a few snipes, some gripes,
some snaps and grabs of other sites
But you have to be quick with them!
They disappear quicker then what's
acceptable as a modest lady's hem...

Overall?

There has been fantastic poetry
Some marvellous writes
A great deal of Awesome
you can take to bed at night

So much to read and to ponder,
to listen to and contemplate

I'm going to give HP
a 9 out of 10 this week

It's the best I can rate!

in darkness, a world disintegrates
in hell, hope lenders feed the fire
interestingly, as you lay next to me
I'm burning beneath such desire
a little voice whispered wishes
that fell beneath shallow cracks
next to warmth, cloaking subterfuge
bruises appear on uncovered backs
in silence you sleep with the dead
in awareness you fear familiarity
your own cancerous consciousness
finds no utterable, plausible clarity
I'm stable upon the mountaintop
you created from a demons desire
when I descend to the depth of life
will you follow?
or be swallowed by the fire?

We don't always get what we want
we very rarely get what we deserve
most often time, we stand in line
turning a corner to find a curve
Standing alone, at the end of the line
We fail to see beyond the bend
We shuffle along in our own blindness
until the light deblinds us, and then,
We see where we are headed
instantly taking a thousand steps back
except we must accept and find we're on
an express elevator to the beyond
and it's an expressly* one way track

did you know?
That at 15 years old I was *****
in the back of a car?
I was not alone, next to us
lay another couple, limbs entwined
like mine, but no tears were found

did you know?
For the next 5 years I had ***
with any boy that said to me
I love you because, *** is love...
right?

did you know?
I only really fell in love once
in a life where love is rife
I fell in love with a boy so completely
wrong for me
but made me feel.... nice?

did you know?
that boy gave me back my voice
helped me scream into the void
and sat and held my hand
as the screams echoed back
inside my head and made me
understand, how I had a choice

did you know?
that boy became my universe
my sun, my moon, my dark, my light
who gifted me little star babies
that feature in my dreams at night

did you know?
The boy became a man
became a agitated, muted clam
after careening head first into flight
remembering that he had others
in his life, he needed to fight.

did  you know?
that 26 years later
that boy, who became a man
and saved me from being a hater
lies next to me in a sleep
that escapes him most of the time
He slumbers as I massage his scalp
whispering how I was grateful
for his help at such a crucial time
how I was happy to find
someone that didn't just want
to take advantage of me

did you know?
He's mine

I like the picture of you
all silk skin and lean muscle
but not everywhere
giggles
I just stop to stare
Completely mesmerised
I like to practice kissy faces
into the mirror of your eyes
I like how the milk from
your breakfast cereal
runs down your chin
I want to chase it
with my tongue
I like how the honey
that drips from your pancakes
reminds me of *** and sin

I like how we have
the same routine
Wake up, make up
Shower together
my hand prints
shoulder high on the screen

I like to do yoga poses
to the moves you make
as you ride your girlfriend
but, make no mistake
I have a headshot of me
with a bit of blu tac on back
that I can move around the screen
whenever she's in the scene
and...
I'm liking how you ride me!
It's like Yoga nirvana!
you'll never find the cameras...

I Love you and bananas!

I’ve turned the other cheek
To endure the slap in the face
I’ve been there and done that
Some things time can not erase
Walk a mile in my shoes
Ha! You would never endure
Maybe stop to smell the roses
But nothing will remain pure
This old dog knows new tricks
So throw me a freakin’ bone
Jesus came? Good for him!
But I still walk alone
I’ll take off my rose colored glasses
Before my drinks are mixed
I don't think that I am broken
Why should I bother to be fixed
I have licked my wounds
I can now live and let live
But what makes me forget
Is why I should forgive
I’ve paid my dues
I’ve made the bed
I now lay upon
I have now come
To the end of the line
But I think this
Is my swan song
I’ll bury my head in the sand
Ignorance is such bliss
You can give with one hand
And take with the other

*But You Can’t Touch This!

he walks softly down the hall
pausing only long enough to stare
at the empty piece of wall
and pictures no longer there

he traces his hands softly
gently stroking an invisible face
that he had memorised so fondly
but disappeared without a trace

he ghosts down to the bedroom
tripping over spectres of the past
as one might perhaps presume
he takes each step as his last

it still all looks the same
nothing has been touched
trails of nothing refuse a name
inelegantly scribbled in the dust

stepping back, not turning around
ghosting past the missing frames
on a wall as empty as broken ground
just waiting for the remains

She walks the distance
upon a barren moon
where stardust gathers
between her toes
forgotten planets are
remembered, too soon

Her path remains unknown
where sunlight threads
through her amber gaze
sifting breaths between
Silver, on midnight blue
peering through
a galaxy haze
seeing nothing new

Black holes and Supernovas
are small events,
not to her surprise
She crosses oceans
of ill formed creations
that seek to crush her
beneath their demise

Grit beneath her fingernails
crusted diamonds of pre life
She walks on sand like velvet
taking her own sweet time
universally dropping strands
of whiskey and dark red wine
Marking the path to
soul desperation
her only way to shine

That was fun!* she cried as she clapped her tiny little hands. Her long red fingernails clicked against each other as she bought her hands together, making a sound like a beetle scuttling across the ***** concrete floor. It echoed in the almost empty space.
Lets do it again! she whispered and the smile on her face eclipsed the gloom in the cavernous waste and the echo of her laugh rose to the high corners vibrating in the long forgotten cobwebs.
He lifted one eyebrow at her delight and the corner of his mouth twitched but he remained silent at her joy.
He turned away and after careful consideration, chose his most favourite piece of apparatus, and came around slowly as a strangled moan caressed his ears and the sight in front of him lit into his pupils, staining them red.
She draped herself over his back, her fingertips lightly caressing his chest, he turned his lips to tickle her earlobe and asked,
*Which finger, or toe, next my love? Or perhaps, I could give you, their heart?

said the Spider to the Fly

tonight you'll be my dinner

said the Fly to the Spider

so who here is the winner?

said the Spider to the Fly

well, that would be me

said the Fly to the Spider

sorry to leave you hungry

*breaking from the Spiders web
to fly free

is it worth tears?
pain aside, the first time
who didn't cry?

The hill so steep
gasping breath
collapsing mid step
the hill
a mound
without a sound
the stream is crossed
no more than a trickle
of tears
after so many
years
You climbed
a mountain
I tripped
into a puddle
tears are covert
mis stepped
to an uneven beat
angry limbs
form a defensive
huddle
tears warm
cold places
falling from eyes
blurred
that watch you
sleep

Dream My Sweet

as I drown

do you know what it's like to be the only sane person to live inside insanity? To know that your world is not tricked out by delusions or illusions of normality? do you know what it's like to awake to cries in the night, waking with a heart pounding, dry throat, wretched hope knowing that your throat is unaffected but you lie next to the displaced, affected in their nightmare and all you have is two arms to hold them tight and one heartbeat to place beneath their ear giving them a semblance of life? do you know what it's like to know reality and wanting to wish someone normal only to realise that your normal could be more damaging to a mind that broke at the apex of their life? those of us who think we are sane as we hold the hand of those that have been proven into insanity are more broken, as we look into the mirror suspended above the vanity that leaks with a faulty faucet, we picture ourselves as saviours, but let's face it, we're as faulty as the hand we hold, as the tears we dry, as the tormented screams we hear as they cry except, we are the Sane, the undiagnosed saviours of the souls that we love, we just find it easier to hide our pain

as you rise, the East
awakes at dawn, my night time
spawns new horizons

In a back alleyway
so dimly lit, he found me
In a bar out of the way
in a corner, he found me
Pacing beside a raging fire
ready to step forward,
he found me
Lost in my own ire
speaking calmly, he found me
Kneeling in the cold darkness
heart sore, he found me
Waiting alone, in my starkness
he pulled me home, he found me
He found me hungry, he found me needing
He found me alone, naked and bleeding
He found me cold and offered warmth
He found me vulnerable
and offered his coat
He found me in a place
I never really wanted to be
He found me only because
he lived there with me

As my frontal lobe articulates
from the anterior, just under
my forehead, I understand
why sweat beaded upon my
upper lip and my eyes bled

Spilling words onto a sheet
of paper, ink stains shaped
like a swarm of angry bees.
Crisping like raisins too long
in the sun, angling on a hook
that captures May like a
golden sunset dying on a breeze

Messages in Cherry Red reflecting
on the mirror to be read back after
an intoxicating night. Never would
the words remain in the steam of
a quiet shower that washes away
remnants of sorrow or a quaking
knowledge that what the lipstick
says just might happen to be right

A table set for twenty six as only
one will attend to partake of seven
courses of molasses and fake hope
Pacing up and down, rearranging
the letters in a potion of epic…ness
that can only come from plucking
consonants from a burning lava,
scraping the bottom of the barrel
for a vowel in the Alphagetti soup

There is the napkin I blew my nose
into which only had a phone number
on it. It turned into 8 reasons why
I would never bother to call
And there is the corner of my duvet
that I dribbled on but the pattern
resembled all my shattered dreams
that poured out of my mouth while
sleeping and became my greatest fall

Here is the ultrasound that has a few
words that sum up what the world
means to me and a picture of our daughter
This is the 15 scraps of paper that you
wrote 15 different lines of love to me
and they are all in the box, being loved
just as everything else ought to.

There are books and printouts and bits
of cardboard and a piece of driftwood
that I used to scratch a few words in
with a rock along with the photo of
the words written inside a heart on a
beach that was one thousand kilometers
away from you but I was there and
you were not.

There is 3.4 gig on a computer and
a gazillion that are frothing inside a
compartment that is internalized and labeled
Someday To Be Said. No matter where or
how or why or now or latter on paper or
engraved in rock on a elaborately carved stone
or chasing their own tails in their own head
Folded like a paper plane and launched
into a rabid universe words will land where
they will, dressed as they are, happy the party
is still in full swing. They don’t wonder
if the landing is soft, they fall, and then
they become still.

**Happy Landing

leaves are just fallen
and Spring is so far away
why does the warmth stray?

I'm not really who I pretend to be
I'm not really angry at other people
I'm more angry at me.
It's just easier to reflect on them
as they are defenceless,
though it seems senseless
for them to be the object of my ire
while they sit patiently, waiting
to be object of my desire
It's simply easier for me to paint them
in water colours
that drip upon a canvas
that can't absorb it
than it is to mar the canvas of my life
with Oils, that appear more solid.

It doesn't Help... but it doesn't Hurt either...

I once got kicked out of the library
for moving all the Bibles
to the Fiction section
Not mentioning the time
I was escorted
from the casino
because I completely
misinterpreted the meaning
of the Craps table
whats up with that?
Then there was the time
I dumped a whole packet of cornflakes
in front of my blonde friend
and she still couldn’t make the picture
look like the one on the box....!
And I really shouldn't mention....
I once knocked upon the hatch
of an Irish submarine
I know, I know, a nasty trick!
And then there was the time
I put three shovels in the corner
And told my less than
smartest friend
to take her pick!
***!
I laughed so hard
as she started to go mad
and pull her own hair out!
And on the day
she sent me a text message
asking me what the hell
did *I D K mean?
When I replied with
I Don’t Know
I swear I heard her shriek
from a million miles away
even as my phone beeped
and the message read
*** NOBODY KNOWS!!!
I swear!
It’s the most delirious that I have been!
The hilarity that ensues
when you realize that
Ernie truly is nothing** without Bert
I know it doesn’t help
But I love how it doesn’t hurt!

From an empty shore where the veil grew thin
Where all life ended and eternity would begin
where love was hate and acceptance was Sin
The world kept turning and I, I would grin

I smiled, I laughed, I cackled with glee
This was us, just you and me
Sitting alone, together, enjoying an absentee
moment of silence in which we couldn’t flee

We told stories that were epics of folk & Lore
Which became legends of old, too hard to ignore
Words bled from the heart, tired and sore
and crying eyes, so broken and raw

But winters ice kept us safe and warm
While mountains watched us as we mourn
we lay at their base so open and torn
waiting for the stinging cold of the dawn

I’ll tell you a secret so full of lies
With a mouth crammed with butterflies
and eyes that seek justice but never tries
to open upon a shrieking soul that cries

While the fire keeps burning
The world keeps turning

I will continue to yearn
for your return