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Helen Nov 2014
sometime, last night, I wrapped the sheet that was trapped between our heat, around my slender hips, across my bared chest and I tiptoed across the floor, to the door, that took me down the quiet hall and into the kitchen, where memories of our last fight sat congealing on the bench and on the floor, in between the broken wine bottle and the knife standing on its tip, embedded in the breadboard.
Last night, my love burned to ashes on a pyre of self loathing and bitter sweet regrets as I undressed and laid myself before you like dessert, even though the meal was less fine, and you whispered over and over you're mine and each heartbeat, last night, was for you, each whimper borne from pain, from shame, without a name, last night, it was all for you...
Last night you broke me, last night you spoke to me in ways that will always remain my terror, where you are the demon, ever ruling forever, my secret domain.
Last night, as I ghosted through the door, wrapped in our sweat stained sheet, a whisper beneath my feet and my soul dragging behind me like a long lost sheep...
I entered the kitchen and ignored
the evidence of our last hope and reached out a steady hand toward the breadboard.

This morning, I am a brand new woman
Helen Nov 2014
Who cares
What path was taken?
What words were spoken?
What hearts were broken?
Who cares
What lies were told?
What truths were bold?
What beliefs were shaken?
Who cares
What road was chosen?
What mode of transport?
Or even what prize was sort?
We all end up in the same place
with the same certainty
and even the same face.
We all arrive at different times,
we go down with no sound,
into a ground,
so recently
*
broken
Helen Oct 2014
after stabbing you repeatedly
I tossed you out into my front yard
along side all the rest of the other
lying cheating *******!

*Won best decorated house for Halloween...
  Oct 2014 Helen
PrttyBrd
I hate
          when dreams
                    feel like memories
                              you never had
10w
102814
Helen Oct 2014
Stupid words!
They claw
at my insides
They completely
fog my brain
Stupid words!
they spill my secrets
when, inside
they should have
remained
Stupid words!
they have no thought
besides becoming
known
Stupid words!
that clog my throat
inside an empty world,
they are sown
Stupid words!
I hate you!
Even as I leave them
drip dying in the breeze
Stupid words!
I love you!
Even though
No one
Believes
Helen Oct 2014
I don't have your body
I don't have your mind
I dont have your perfect life
I take what I can find
I don't have your hope
I don't have your dreams
I may look like a dope
but for the differences, it seems
I  don't have your joy
I don't have your money
I don't have your prefect family
but, isn't it funny?
I don't dress like you
I don't laugh at the same things
I dont care for appearances
or the adulation it brings
But in between those differences
we are more alike than we try
We both lay down at night
with an audible sigh
We say our prayers
to our own chosen Deity
then most often,
we cry
we are not so different
You and I
*you see?
Helen Oct 2014
I have very little time for me
5.30am I wake, so I can read
6am I'm waking school children
6.30am I'm making lunches
and waking them again
7am I'm ready and waking them again
in between, I try to read...
3pm, after work, I've picked them up,
home again, I have no luck
I'm reading homework, doing washing,
cooking dinner while they sit watching
asking questions, demanding my time
showing me answers, I can't say Nien!
at the time they are ready for quiet
I'm deep into my own bottle of Claret!
I've exhausted topics from
Logistics to get to the Fete,
and simple dress changes
that relate, if acceptable for camp?
and can my girlfriend stay
just for a night?
Mum! Look at me dance?
Have I got it tight?

I'm tapping away trying express
my own thought
then comes a little voice
that breaks down my fort...
And I realise,
I can't tap out a rhyme
the could ever compete
to the little dancing feet
that demands my attention
no less than your poem
but rest assured
as you have written it
I've read it, I just thought
*you should know
excuses, excuses but... if I had 27hrs in my day, I'd still not be able to say how much I would love to be able to ****** enough time to tell you how much I love what you've written :)
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