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i wish you happiness, something that you never gave.
so i gave you what you wanted,
your freedom and your choice;
i hope that you're contented with,
the sound of your own voice.
how would you know if your soul is broken?
simple.
you don't read poetry,
you write it.
you are the human personification of a smile
y'all deserve to know this
i remember the first poem i ever wrote
to you
you were every romanticized line in the moonlight
you were my muse in my prose and poetry
i wrote about how you held me so tight
and now i'm writing this tonight because you lose your grip

this is the last poem i’ll ever write to you
and i swear this would be the last
but i constantly change my mind
so i might write you ten thousand other poems
which you'll never get to read
because i won't write them down
i’ll just hold them in
the same way i wanted words from you
but all i got was deafening silence

this is the last poem i’ll ever write to you
and this is the last time i’ll ever think about you
your scent
your warm embrace
your almond eyes
your caress
your vulnerability
this is the last time i’ll ever think of us

this is the last poem i’ll ever write to you
and this is the last time i’ll let you in
hurt me once more, i beg
so i’d be numb
and stop writing poems about you
and maybe this time,
this would make me stop loving you
  Mar 2017 trixia ella marie
Love
I guess I won that stupid fight of "I love you more."
I don't know if I should start with how we fell apart
Or how we fell in love,
but whichever way it goes,
We know we fell out of love.

I'm not sure if I should start saying "sorry"
Or should I blame myself.
But whatever happened with that part,
We drifted apart.

I know I was at fault
I know you were too.
We say we were both just young,
Still, I lost you.

I wish rules never exist in love
But if there were none,
I wish I had, I wish I had,
I would still had you in my arms right now.

It ***** how we always say "we are humans"
With feelings
With emotions
With a story
And even when we know we still love,
We choose not to,
We pretend to

Then you showed up with someone new,
I feel remorse for myself
For thinking you are just filling the void between the two of us
But we choose not to
We pretend to

As soon as I hit the bed,
Tears fall straight from my face
Wiping every memory
The smell of your scent still lingers
I chose this, we can't pretend

My mouth longs to speak these unsaid words
It's choking me.
The thought of you drowns me.
I'm just lost.
You choked me. You drowned me. I'm lost.

But we choose not to,
We pretend to
Despite of how we feel,
We knew guilt is greater than our love
So I chose to walk away
We shouldn't have stayed.

But if ever I get the privilege
To have my heart broken again,
I would still pick to love you
But we choose not to,
We pretend to
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