all my life
i've worried (without really knowing it)
that my actions are defining who i am.
but the more i've grown
the clearer life's shown me
that my reactions and conviction
in the way i go about them
give a better understanding
for the man i hope i am

I'm frozen stiff -
encased in case it's dangerous.

Without realising,
You became the most at home I'd ever been.
A shelter of warmth,
Locked up safeties and tucked-in frailties
Lie in wait for the weather outside.

She used to love me
But now
She's just a stranger
Who knows me inside out

When we're older,
I'd like us to live by the hills.
Away from the silly thrills of the bustle of buses
and the rustle of wallets.
Away from those so desperate to be happy
but so increasingly aware of how not to hold onto it.
I want to be able to sit in silence on a Saturday -
That might seem like a simple thing to ask for but
here in the city, there's little room to think.
A seat surrounded by chaos is no substitute for the
whisper of the wind as it dances with the daisies
and prances with the daily ease of the hillside's treasures.
You deserve the freshest air and nothing less,
a sea-breeze seen too far from here
for your hair to run right through it.
Anyway, I've been rambling.
I hope one day we'll live back home,
but for now, I'll continue to slowly wipe away your duvet'd haze,
gently seeping sunlight through the cracks in your eyes.
This is always my favourite part of the day;
A beautifully brief moment of limbo between your dreams my mind.
Your gradual recognition of reality
is met by my delight
in response to your gradual smile

And once this brief moment is over,
I can begin to live,
day by day
with only you.

All I'd like
Is to feel a little less alone
When I'm all by myself

We used to tussle on the bathroom floor
And hide away our secrets
behind the pantry door.
Your Mum would drink herself to sleep each night
After discussing with her mind the favoured ways she'd like to die,
Concluding somewhat sadly
That she'd gladly drown beneath her cries -
A pain she only shows below her eyes;
A burn she's slowly learnt how to disguise.