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 Jul 2013 Hannah Adair
Jobe David
Please don't leave me,
I don't want to be alone.
I don't know how you feel,
But when you're here its home.
I'm calm, and comfortable.
Able to focus, and be real.
I have a broken heart, yes.
But..
My love wounds attempt to heal.
Love wounds my attempts to heal.
I trust too much, can't handle or deal
When I get let down; get in bad ordeals.
Afflicted, my name it says it all, and I say:
I didn't ask to be born, to grow up this way.
I never asked for a mom, or cried out for a dad.
If they left or they stayed, I wouldn't be mad.
But I never got the option, not even to care.
Dare to be aware of knowing no one was ever there?
I hate the feeling, it hits me deep in my chest
My personality reflects traits that may not be best;
I crave your affection. Really bad, you don't know..
I just need all that love that i consistently show.
I'm afraid to be forgotten, I'm afraid to let you go.

Please don't leave me,
I can't be alone..
Before I begin I want to ask a question.
How many of you here have secrets you would never tell anyone?
.
.
.
Now if you know who I am,
You know I've recently taken to asking questions,
Before I let loose my rhymes and rhythms,
Before I allow my words to do the walking.
.
.
.
I can understand if you all have secrets that you won't tell anyone,
I do not mean the secrets that you trust to your closest friends or your spouse,
I mean the secrets that will die with you,
It is in human nature to always hide things that we are afraid of,
Some hide them for the simple reason that they do not trust others,
Some hide them because they cause to much pain,
Some hide them because they wish that part of their life had never occurred,
Now if you do not fall under one these three main categories there are hundreds of other reasons,
But for you people that do I understand,
I hide my secrets from everyone because I do not trust them,
To trust them would mean to allow someone else with complete control over my darkest secrets,
Over my life,
I hide secrets because I am afraid of what others will think of me,
Because society has taught us that we have to fit in,
That we cannot be different,
I hide things because of the pain that it brings me just to think of,
Let alone speak of,
Could you imagine if I told people and they brought it up by accident,
I hide things because I myself do not believe,
Or wish not to believe that things happened,
Idiotic stupid things,
Things I never thought I'd do,
So if you ever think that you are the only one with secrets,
Just think of this poem,
And think of this,
If no one in my life new that I wrote poetry until 2012,
What other secrets do I hide.
 Jul 2013 Hannah Adair
Aisling
It's obvious
It's so desperate to be near you that it has literally become part of you
It has found a way to sneak through and melt into you
And I'm jealous
Because I'm desperate to be near you
I worship your skin as the salt does
Your hair as the sunlight does
Your eyes as the laughter does
But I fear you may notice if I endeavor to be with you in every sense of the word
So I will continue to brood
In partial silence
Forever envious of the salt and sunlight and laughter
Light of the moon, the twinkle in her eye
No one around, just her and I
Heat of the hour, try to control it
Bound forever, stuck in this moment

She speaks softly and hides her face
Lost in her beauty, without a trace
Opening a window to a world unknown
Waiting patiently for her soul to be shown

Long nights and long drives keep us apart
But it is her who has my heart
Welcome to the ten step guide on how to fool everyone into thinking you're okay

Step One: Smile. Smile your biggest brightest smile to ward off the people who don't know you well enough to realize that it's fake, let your pearly whites be the shield you hide behind so your secret stays a secret

Step Two: Even if the clouds have opened and poured down all the tears you're holding in dress up in your nicest dress so you get more compliments on how pretty you look than questions about how puffy your eyes are

Step Three: When confronted; say I'm just tired, push the fib through your teeth and hope your nose doesn't grow to the size of your lie and make sure you maintain eye contact so they don't catch onto how nervous you are that they might find out

Step Four: Cover up the jawbreakers decorating your skin by wearing a long sleeve shirt even though it's summertime

Step Five: Break out your inner actress, especially when he's around because while he's using your headboard as a punching bag he'll expect you to like it

Step Six: Every time you wanna say hate replace it with love...I love feeling helpless every day, I love being your human doll, I love being camouflaged with purples blacks and greens...I love you...

Step Seven: Fasten your dog collar onto the next notch because he wants you to remember how his hand feels around your throat, he wants you to remember what being scared feels like, he wants you to realize he owns you

Step Eight: Think about what you can do to make things better because as he tells you it's all your fault and he only hits you because he loves you and you're lucky that a guy like him sticks around with a girl like you because you're worthless and you believe it

Step Nine: Let it all out, scream into your pillow and shower off every fibre of him like it's a poison setting into your skin and then cry yourself to sleep to prepare for

Step Ten: Repeat
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