There are things that I don't usually tell people
things like I wish I could remember my fathers voice
or that sleeping alone is the most daunting thing I face in darkness
I don't tell people that I pray for them at night
or while I'm on the subway
or walking home from work
I don't tell people that they brighten my day
or that they make it a little easier to breathe
but i know I should
There are things I keep to myself
like that i discovered the fine line where being independent becomes being lonely
I don't tell people I still think of you so many months later
and I don't tell people that you haunt my dreams even though i've only known you for a week
I don't remind my friends that I do love them
I don't tell the boy on the corner that his smile makes my cheeks hot
i don't
instead
I say things like :
I want to *******(i want to be close to you)
I'm fine(its hard to get out of bed today)
I love working so much(i wish other people still took care of me)
There are things I don't usually tell people
I don't explain the scars when they see
I let them fill in the blanks themselves

the woman came in
to our office
and my deputy took her statement

her husband had been missing
over three days;
and she handed in a photo
for identification

and she had a message
for her husband, faithfully recorded
by my deputy:
*"Come home, darling-
mother didn't come to visit after all"