I miss your eyes
and your laugh
and your voice

I miss your humor
and your wildness
and your tenderness

I miss that focused look you get
when you concentrate
on your video games

I miss going to A building
at bcc and curling up on the couch
watching movies together

I miss our spot in the woods
And how we would spend countless hours there
Just enjoying eachothers company

But what I miss most

Being held close
being in your arms
listening to your heart beat

Cry
Scream
shout
freak
the
****
out!

cry my heart out
for everything I've left behind
My old life
my past

SCREAM
Then maybe He will see
My fear
That all our hopes and dreams
will never see the day of light

SHOUT
For someone to notice me
To hold me
I'm desprate for human contact

Freak
the
****
out
FOR
SOMEONE
ANYONE
TO
JUST
*******
TELL
ME
THAT
THEY
UNDERSTAND

tell me
I'm not
going crazy

I normally keep it hidden
With a joke and a Smile
But if you look closely
you might be able to see

My eyes all shiny
with unshed tears
my body tense
to keep it from falling apart

I just want to cry
break the dam
and let the tears flow

Every day
all day
I just want to cry

What we need
is a good old fashion
Best freind day!

So this is what I'll do

I'll ride that bus
to the station
and then stomp my fat ***
to your house
break down your door
and drag you out
and make you get on that stupid bus

but first I'll steal that shirt of yours I love

Then once we get off that bus
did I ever mention how much I actual like that bus?
I will drag you
To the China Gormet
sit you down in the chair
and order us some food
Our weight in Crab Rangoons

you like that wonton soup too right?

THEN
THEN
I will make you carry all that food
and lead the way to our old hang out
Under the playset
of the elementary school

ONCE we are settled
and snakcing happily
We will talk about stupid ****
lets add more inside jokes
to the list we already have

LIGHT BULB,
devils opera,
repo the genetic Carnival
It's only hard enough to stay Stiff

Please
Let us do this
Please
I beg of you

Becuase I can see it in your words
I can hear it in your voice
You're slipping away again
Just out of my grasp

And I don't want to almost lose you
Like I did last time

:'(

What can I say
I knew of this kitty
She was always there
Never closes, just been told about
Didn't really knowing any thing good
Had no reason to think any thing bad
After ever thing that had happened
There was no reason to know any thing more
Then the kitty tapped on my window with her paw
Thinking about it for a while
I let her in
I never would have thought this kitty would
be my friend

Hey baby Where were you today? I needed you so much but you werent there {Deleted, to afraid to send}

So we havent talked all day. Why? {Deleted, to afraid to send}

Again we havent talked all day, And whats scary is, I'm starting to be ok with that {Deleted, afraid to send}

Why don't we skype anymore? I have my Ipod now. We could skype everynight! {Deleted, afraid to send}

Baby please tell me this feeling is all in my head, But I fear we are growing apart {Deleted, terrified to send}

Baby, whats happening to us? *{Deleted, afraid to send}

His arms,
are my,
protectors.

His smile,
is my,
sun.

His voice,
is my,
lullaby.

His laugh,
is my,
music.

his kindness,
is my,
comfort

His humor,
is my,
Entertainment.

His love,
is all,
I need.