My mind is yearning
Fires churning
Gears pull and turning
But with every pass my soul is burning

I have bin lost for years
Thinking it was a brave new world
And all I needed to be happy was soma
But I have lived a life that has brought many to tears
And to me it just felt like a coma

Sounds reverberating in my ears
My eyes have bin forcefully unfurled
A rotting putrid smell replacing the sweet aroma
I must awaken to face the horrors and my fears
Because if I don't make things right no one els is gonna

The past has become scars and pains
Trapped in its bars and chains
Let's look towards the stars and move forward with what remains

The poisonous deadly floral rose
Just a flower on a stick in a sensual pose
There's a joyfulness power that only a true admirer (knows / will expose)
But soon they all see the pointlessness while its aroma hits their nose
Because with a swift ***** they die painfully contemplating as their final hour goes

Lost in devastation
Fighting of inebriation
Hopelessly lost
Clawing out at all cost
To divert Death's sweet sedation

12:00 am, The 13th of Friday
Under the full moons light
I will end things my way
This time it'll be done right
No need to search
In front of the church
In plain sight
Under the crane's sway
My body will lay

I timed this to message your number
So try don't and call
As you slumber
I will fall
And with a  swan dive
I'll end it all

I don't want a grave
No one to save my ash
No a funeral or mass
And if my soul refuses to pass
I want to be drugged to end any pains
Plugged into my veins
And then to be unplugged
With my young brother to own my art and property that remains

I wish this wasn't the end
But it was a fate I couldn't defend
Since I had a father
Who did more then viciously beat me since I was a toddler
And a Mother
Who saw saving me as an inconvenient bother

But I hope you don't cry
Even though I will die
I will always be your baby bird
But at least now I can fly

I want to die
But I can't say bye
It's hard to justify
I would be a disgrace
For those I chose to mortify

I got to try
But my feelings intensify
Try not to cry
Put on a brave face
Or a filthy lie

I can't untie
But I feel like a spy
Any one can identify
With just the trace
Of a look in my eye

I want to fly
But I can't even get by
I can no longer deny
I can't keep this pace
My end is nigh