Obnoxious words
I carry between my teeth
No, no
I can't let them escape my grip
Jaw locked
Mouth dry
Shaking

Why do you have so much to say
Keep it in, keep it in

These are secrets
These are spells
Enchanted
Charmed
Distraught
Look what ache you can cause
Don't you dare release them

The overthinking *****
In my body
Harasses me

Emotions linger
The guilt
The shame

In the end,
I know if I release these obnoxious words
Nothing--
Absolutely NOTHING, would ever be the same.

We lived in parallel universes but decided to meet here
Strange how I was enough for you and too much at the same time
On the night you held me, you let me be the remedy to all your problems
I kissed away monsters and let you take control of my body
I listened to your words
But my speech was slurred and you didn't understand so you took to my skin and bones instead
I have flashbacks now wondering if I should label myself as the fool
The potions and words made a recipe for a hurricane of emotions
But I refuse to let regret be one of them
I'm not ashamed of the flaws I let show
I'm not ashamed that I told you my dreams
I'm not ashamed that I flashed you a peak of my earliest heartbreak
and that I played it cool when you told me that I'll never be the one for you
I'm not going to play the cute victim
I exposed every wound and scar to you
I carried more courage than the Lion
A weak man like you will never know
This will never be something you'll own
You were right I do have magic
and it lives in me whether you believe in it or not.

I find myself
Dangerously intoxicated
By you
So smooth
Effortless
Stringing words together
In a perfect line
And like ***** shots
I take them all
Let them burn my throat
Hole in my stomach
Toxicity
My brain is aching
Splitting headache
Sharpness in your words
Bitterness on my tongue
I crave your concoctions
Passing out in bathroom stalls
At your mercy
Don’t you stop
Sweet poison
Willingly I drink
Mad scientist
Crazy poet
You know your way
With words
And there
There I sit
Slurred speech
Muddied brain
Nothing intelligent to say
But--

can I have another drink?