PASSING stranger! you do not know how longingly I look upon you,
You must be he I was seeking, or she I was seeking, (it comes to me, as of a dream,)
I have somewhere surely lived a life of joy with you,
All is recall’d as we flit by each other, fluid, affectionate, chaste, matured,
You grew up with me, were a boy with me, or a girl with me,          5
I ate with you, and slept with you—your body has become not yours only, nor left my body mine only,
You give me the pleasure of your eyes, face, flesh, as we pass—you take of my beard, breast, hands, in return,
I am not to speak to you—I am to think of you when I sit alone, or wake at night alone,
I am to wait—I do not doubt I am to meet you again,
*I am to see to it that I do not lose you.

I've got a lot of dead skin to slough off and a lot of people
that have forgotten how to love
of whom I need to let go.

You had to take my safe place,
the one place your hands hadn't touched

Every single part of my body
Shakes vigorously with
Anger, sadness, depression
My hands tremble aggressively
And I put my shirt in my mouth
So he won't hear me scream
******* and what you did to us
And I lay half naked on the floor
Of my locked room sobbing violently
When is it too much to handle

I text my mom asking her if I should go in there and tear him apart with words so truthful it'd leave him speechless
And then she says no, and I realize she's right
I'd be too scared of what he'd do to me afterwards.

sometimes I don't even have words
sometimes they don't deserve your words.

the air's a little warmer
my heart's a little freer
and I don't miss you as much anymore.