Lets throw it away
For a night
Only one

The differences and struggles
The anger and the fights
Just so we can sleep in peace

One night only
Is all I ask
But you cannot even give that

I know she's
In the bathroom stall
Letting the magic dust
Work it's way to her dreams
And she comes out
Her laugh airy

Her windows meet mine
And she halts
Her smile fades
Her laugh stops
And she sniffs the dust and snot
Back into her happy place

I take a step towards her
Eyes wet
With knowing
And she takes a step back
And collapses
Against the concrete

She sits and let's her sadness
Drip down her nose
Her eyes
And her mouth
Speaks of her past in one blurr
Stuttering

I don't even know her
But comfort her I do
And I take
The white dust
In the bag from her hand
And toss it down the toilet

I whisper it's done
All gone
And that she needed to pull herself together
And leave
She whips out her cell
Phones for a woman on the other side

And I leave the bathroom
Thinking maybe something broke tonight

We tell ourselves
It won't hurt

We promise ourselves
We won't cry

What a crock
Of *******
*******

I've begun it
The distancing process
You say you won't leave
But well wait and see

That wait won't be long
Before I'm left all alone
In our park
When it's dark outside

My love, you'll find someone prettier
Smarter, with the body
Way out of your league
As I sit here wondering where we went wrong

If I distance myself from you
Maybe it won't hurt that bad
It will be easier for the both of us
You won't feel hurt at all

Because you'll have her
While you hate me
For distancing us
Loosing all those secrets and trust

It needs to be done
To save us both

But as I write this
I miss you already

18 seems so close
But so far away
It doesn't arrive quick enough
Here I don't want to stay

I screamed at him
That I hate him
That he has lost all my respect
All trust has been trimed

He shrugged because
He doesn't care
He thinks I'm just angry
He doesn't know my heart is bare

Where that trust used to be
I never fully respected or loved my father
But now he has lost what little he had
Of his depressed daughter

He screamed back at me
Fine get away from me then
So I went, screaming, stomping away
With the thought of I hate men

He doesn't realize
His actions impacted me bigger
Than he thought
I just want to pull the trigger

My body pillow
Isn't you

My diary
Doesn't talk back

My razor blades
Hurt me in a different way

And my heart
Isn't the same