my wrists feeling tight and also ripped apart
they've been strapped down,
my legs hurt
they've been amputated at the knee,
I try to scream
but my lips have been sewn shut,
what did I do to end up like this?
tortured.
in pain and all alone..

Last night, I did not think of you once ...
Every time I lifted the can to my lips, I knew you were just memory !

A tasteful, hurtful memory !
One that I can't get rid of the taste ...

Maybe I didn't .. Maybe I didn't forget you last night ! I just thought I did ..

“wrong number” came from a familiar voice,
On the other end of the phone before,
Hanging up.

“wrong number” the voice being very familiar,
It rings over and over in my head,
Who could it be.?

“wrong number”
“wrong number”
“wrong number”

…..

I called her the other day, I pretended it was the wrong number
I just wanted to hear her voice one last time,
I needed to hear her voice.
“hello?” her voice still
Clear in my mind,
The last persons voice I wanted to hear,
Before my car was wrapped around a tree.

My screams are silent,
My thoughts too loud.
I'm lost but can't make a sound.
This.
This is what society has done.
Anxiety holds us back,
Depression rids us of all hope.
The self-conscious hear your whispers as screams,
And suicide is on everyone's to-do list.
This.
This is what society has done.
We let our fear control us,
Shape us,
Become us.
This.
This is what society has done.
It has destroyed us.

I'm falling,
Back into this abyss.
You are my ladder,
My hold,
I've climbed so far,
But my grip
Is weakening.
I'm falling,
Returning to the place
I'd been before.
God help me,
But wait
There is no God.
I'm alone,
And I'm falling.
Rock bottom,
I've hit hard.
My skin splits,
And blood seeps through.
Wrists.
Thighs.
I'd avert your eyes,
I'm carving out my goodbyes.

I woke up at 3AM,
"Old time Rock n Roll"
Playing loud and clear.
Your face glowed upon the screen
That smile devoid of fear...
Before we knew,
Before you moved and this,
Us,
Became so strained.
Before you left me alone,
And after-
After you told me,
You loved me...
After I replied the same.
Three hours ahead,
You called with no shame,
No care whatsoever but,
Only because I asked.
You called to say,
Good morning.
And I answered,
Goodnight.