I check my phone,
all the time,
hoping for a text,
from the one who left,
the one who owns my heart,
but as usual, nothing from you,
like, girl, I ******* love you so strongly,
I know I was a fool but I want you near me,
I can't sleep or eat when we're apart,
I fall asleep in the dark, tears making my eyes hurt,
I stay up every night, waiting for a text,
an 'I miss you' text  that I'll never get.

When I lay in bed, I think of you
I wanna cry my eyes out
When I'm awake, I think of us
I wanna tear your heart up
Not for lying, but for saying
That you loved me and ****
And for playing with my emotions
Like I was losing myself
No more venom in my system
But I'm still not over your presence
You are haunting and consuming
Sometimes I hate my own existence
You were amazing, ******* amazing
But it was all an illusion
Now I'm smashing
All the mirrors
Because I no longer
Feel safe behind closed doors
You were a liar but I fooled myself
Into thinking you were your true self
My heart keeps beating for someone
Who was lying to keep me in their bed
As if I didn't suffer enough
You filled my head
With thoughts of forever
Really thought we'd be together

I believe I love you
You thrill me
You know you do
I believe you're the key
To my heart & I
My thoughts are up
In the clouds
In the sky