I wanted to post you some autumn leaves

blood red
jewel like
littering my garden

enclosed in an envelope they withered
darkened to dull

the love that nearly sent them glows

I sit on a beach
the sea is rough
a pair seagulls hurtle by
a mere foot above the waves
I try to imagine what it's like
to be them
moving through the air at that speed
looking down
wild ocean frothing foaming
surging below me
so close
that when a wave breaks
it reaches up to pull me under
feeling the cold spray splattering my chest

so you finally get to have her
on her deathbed
how perfect
would you ****** as much
over me
on mine
of course not
that's too real
you'd run away
as you already have

got a rather large
rabbit
hopping round my garden
without even
a beg your pardon

every atom
blasted apart
reconstituted
in an instant
random fragments
of memory surface
then spin out of sight
permanence and solidarity
laughable
dissolving
everything tissue thin
friable

truth has teeth
of that I'm sure
cos when it bites
bods bite back more

do me a favour
while im here
keep your crush
tucked in your pants
if you want this thing
to go forward
not end
in the same old dance

Past the age
for intrigue
I read my old diary
so urgent
those underlinings

you are the most intelligent man ive ever met
and yet
go against your own best advice
does the second statement
render the first
null

It's been years
you knock on the door
i open it
you come inside
i close the door
we turn to each other
glide into each others arms
faces buried in each others necks
we smell
inhaling deeply
brains click into gear
a process started
i want you with ALL my being
you want me too tho fight it
we undress
no words spoken
clasping each other we couple
urget
over
fast
we cling
inhale each other deeply
again
slowly
we come to
start to part
feelings change
each feel ashamed
of this red hot raw
cool settles in
creates a din
in our brains
we separate
feelings abate
procreation...

are you
******?
when you write
your poems
he asked
as if they were
nothing
more than
that

the
thought

of
you

passes

across
my tongue

like

the
taste of
bitter coffee

The church clock struck
midnight
in muffling fog
a familiar yet
ominous sound
like the warning bell
on an ocean buoy
tolled by sea's
rythmic swell

A soothing mien
he has not
but like a shark
in a swimming pool
he has unignorable
presence

full moon
on the beach
altar to prayers
i sacrifice
vain hopes
and climb
stars
stairs

Impulses signalling
the state
of bone and muscle
come pulsating
along nerves

we dice
and hold the upper hand
with fortunes won hard but
life is a dog and we are curs
with fates befit a mutt

Almost overnight the landscape
seems to have shrugged off
winters debilitations
and risen refreshed
garbed in the bright clean fabric of spring
the sun soars high
in a cloudless sky

I move into some private space
looking for what brings me here
to this place at this hour
the church clock strikes midnight
bringing me out of my reverie
the last note sounds out across the green
rolling out beyond the sleeping cottages and farms
past the nearby meadows
over the silent flowing stream
finally fading to nothingness
in neighbouring valleys
outside I look up
brilliant stars shine down
on the dark unheeding village
I move on looking for what brings me here
to this place at this hour...

nothing
prepares you
for
the ****** decrepitude of old age
an obscenity of
plastic bags for *****
plastic bags for *****
fear of losing
your teeth down a drain
egg white and crackers are all you keep down
grumbling old hags in the coffin queue
waiting for the shroud

drifting through mist
scouring the sand
looking for shells, pebbles
twisted driftwood
ancient treasures clutched in hand
skeins of seaweed
splayed on the beach
foaming white lace
i dance
out of reach

red pulses
heartbeat
where have i been
you
in my veins surge
on re discovering
no hope
we lie
dying

Tranquilizers
make her
soggy
and hard
to light

look at them
a cackling flock
nails,  painted claws  
plucking and clucking over scatter cushions
@ only $5 each
it's a wonder the stuffing doesn't spill

electric shock!
there you are
why didn't i see you
bright star
i knew

poems that sound like the flow of a brook

don't occur to me.....


statico bursts of  hollow pain                        
my golden elm again
and again


music perhaps to those
not quite sane
?

why is this rhyme occuring....

When you opened
the poem
i wrote for you
did you see
my heart fall out

***
those flowers
I can almost taste them
like icecream
berry and vanilla
delicious

the arborist is coming
he will cut limbs
from my golden elm
no longer will they almost climb
into my roof
birds will still nestle in her branches
declaring their territories
at dawn and dusk
but she will be without hands
for awhile

she had wonderful roses
in many a hue
colours glorious
one even blue
but in her vases
stand only a few
for on her rose buds
the possums chew

in gold leaf litter
electric blue wrens

black birds sing
day
ends

flowers faded
petals torn
pattern on
my carpet worn
dusty tread
frayed thread
i'll buy a new one
instead

I've never recalled dreams he said
although it isn't true
re creating history
is what he likes to do
it some how makes him feel good
as he would rather be
the man who has a perfect brain
no need for him to see
i wonder why he does that
i really couldn't say
should i just ignore it
and go my separate way

a
mish
mash
of
absolute trash
my
poems
or
any
thing
that
gives me pause

at 55
i can feel
the
process
of
people withdrawing
children distance
acquaintances die
no longer
a person
more than 1/2 way to a corpse

those unspoken words
that show in the eyes

Little girl
you could see
the poetry
in all around
with toddlers walk
still yet to talk
wide eyed in wonder
without sound

i'm looking at getting a global map up
with all the addys of everyone who responded
pinpointed somehow
just for fun
probably take awhile
anyway thats what I'd like to do
will link it when it's done

If the beginning
started out of
chaos and the void
did they not exist
before the beginning

A lost child
takes you all the way
and beyond
for
no matter what others tell you
of hope
urge you to strength
you are already over the threshold
into the grey land of loss
of grief
of living death

feelings on being dragged back
from that land
joy
gratitude
happiness painful in intensity
compounded by bewilderment
resentment
at being returned to that state
where crossing that threshold
still remains
a possibility

You always take it with you
wherever you go
the heartache that comes from loss of dreams
from pain inflicted by lovers true
taylor made to exactly fit you

please dont give me
any advice
about infinities rewards
there are none

but then
theres the sun
the moon
and stars
birds
bees
deciduous trees
you
me
infinity

what was that
i
said

no I didn't go to work today

birds in flight
crystals falling
breathless silence frozen
sun explodes
dazzling light
wings shatter imploding

how can you tell
the diffeance
between love
and gratitude
can somebody please tell me
cos I'm feeling quite confused
both of them make you happy
one of them sometimes sad
both of them fill your heart up
tho one can feel quite bad
I think I've found the differance
no need for your advice
love can make you miserable
but gratitude feels nice

oh god how is it possible
to love one another
so intensely
yet rub each other up the wrong way
no saving us
i want to dissipate into mist
invade your pores

if
love

is
subject

to
too much
friction

will it
wear
out

as
even
the sturdiest
of
fabrics
do?

i didnt know wether
to leave you
a note
or not

The hills
huddle together
fog draped
around their shoulders
a shawl

why do you love me better after
you've made me cry

i become supplicant
and your love swells

you become
sweet again

tender loving concern pours forth

i lie spent
on the floor
exhausted

is it exacted punishment?
                                         on all women?

on she who sent you to that place of inhumanity?

that destroyer of boys, men and
ultimately women

will it ever change