The choice between
Feeling everything
Or feeling nothing at all

A constant battle of emotions

drowning deep in the ocean
And flying high in the sky

Or floating in an empty space
In the middle
Of nowhere

You,
with your tender
blue eyes
and gentle little soul,
are the warmth, and sunshine
in a cold and dark world.

You bring my life comfort
with your calm purr,
and your soft fur.
I love your
every little claw,
on your every little paw.

And i envy your tiny innocent heart
full of endless,
unconditional love.

You are
the most pretty,
and the finest little kitty.

Thank you
for being my best friend.

It seems that i keep searching for love,
in all the wrong places.

I beg for love,
from people who do not love me.
Though,
i beg silently.

The words dont come to me anymore like they used to.
They elude me.
Or maybe im the one eluding them.
Being evasive.
Hiding.

And what significance does this hold?
(none)

Disastrous jumbled up words
scattered across the sky,
reaching up
trying to grasp and
trying to understand.
Trying
and
trying
and trying...

When the mind regains serenity
The darkness will vanish
And there will be light
Once again

Stuck in a well at midnight.
I look up to see the moon and stars.
The wind whispers to me, and with each whisper chills run down my spine.
The well is deep, impossible to climb.  
The water gently caresses my lips with cold hands, but i cant feel.
Shadows creep over me from above,
i look up to find them watching.
I dont scream for help.
I dont need it.
At the bottom of that well,
i wait for nothing.
And nothing does happen.

off she goes
running as far
as her feet will carry her
towards nothing and nowhere
in particular
forever running
and never stopping
not even just for a second
to think

I yearn
for something i cannot name.
So fiercely,
that my heart aches.

It might be,
that i want to feel
the unconditional love
i never felt.

That i still cant feel.

Or maybe i want to feel
a connection,
a bond so strong
that it is unbreakable.

All i know is
the hole
right in the middle of my chest.
Refusing to be filled.
And the sadness,
that keeps me company
on my loneliest days.
That refuses to leave
no matter what i do.

**** anyone who tries to tell me
that "holding onto anger
is like drinking poison."
because id rather drink poison
than forgive and forget.

i will burn eternally,
brighter than any flame
anyone has ever seen.
Burning everything
and everyone
that stands in
my way.