The scars will be lost within the creases and wrinkles,
this sea will have been traveled and never unraveled.
love left its stain,
time wanes and ebbs the fervor of the summers.
Legs now twigs as fragile as the first,
limbs and bones become limp
soon won't be able to even lift my hand
to write to you a reminder of the marvelous passages
I've traveled.
Sentences running on in place of me whom lies in bed asleep.
Soon, in the dawn of a day my words will lose their sense
and I'll ramble about incomprehensible things.
You'll get tired of me.
I'll fade away to me, forget my face and name;
forget the pen and paper.
Too lost without a reason to be afraid.

There is too much I want to say now that I can-
but the words stumble upon each other.
all I can do is but put on a smile as I stare in to the mirror.
There is not a note of sound but for
the silent gesture of its affliction.

Although it seems ancient now,
and although it may mean nothing to you,
with the changing season,
and the cold settling in,
I am reminded heavily
of you
and the time that
we never spent together
and how my porch remains as empty
as it ever was,
even though it sure felt like
it was all reality.

The metal in this brass knuckle heart
punches my chest from the inside out

The valves, a semiconductor for the static
electricity of your touch

Who ever thought a defibrillator could be so soft?

And in the challenge of this love
I wonder what kind of mettle you're thinking
of now

And I think patience is found
on a molecular level inside the iron
in your blood

And love then, a stone ground down
from your ashes

I mean, pressure and heat are
what diamonds are made from

Tell me again of the struggles you shone through

And through that logic, we are precious stones
but so much softer than that

I want to hold you like the focused light
from a jeweler trying to make a sale
but so much more earnest than that

And what of the contradiction
between hardness
and softness

Because there is you

How can you be so hard
and so full of life?

How can you be so beautiful?

i wonder if the doors in the house you grew up in
started slamming themselves to save your father the trouble.
i wonder if you can remember the last time you prayed,
and if you had trouble unfolding your hands.
i wonder if your mother knows
about the collection of hearts you hide in your closet,
i wonder if she could tell mine apart from the rest.
i wonder if your shoes know the reason why
you keep them by the back door and not your bedside.
and sometimes, i wonder
if you ever think about that night when i told you,
you wouldn't need to drink so much if you had me.
but it seems like we only speak when you've got body on your brain,
whiskey in your glass,
your judgement is overcast,
and you know i'm too weak to ignore you.
i learned how to translate your texts
from drunken mess back into english.
i am fluent in apology, but i don't ask you for them anymore.
this is just how it is.
it's not enough for either of us
but ******* it we are not above settling.
so i will ignore her name on your breath,
and you will ignore the fact that this means something to me.
i always thought the first time i kissed you,
it would be on your mouth.
i just wanted to be something warm for you to sink into,
something that could convince you to stay a second night.
but i sneak you out in the early morning,
and you take a piece of my pride with you when you go.
i am left to nurse the hangover from a wine i've never tasted,
wondering how this is possible.
waiting for the next drunk call,
for the next time i get to pretend we are lovers,
the next time i get to live out the fantasy i am most ashamed of.
it is the one in my head where you want me when you're sober too.

- m.f.

The very eyes of justice are blind folded from seeing the truth

America where are you?

For we shall perish away if the hands of the guilty go unpunished from all crimes committed against the  citizens of The United States of America.

jo.