When I close my eyes
I see yours
Staring back at me
The spaces
In between my fingers
Feel so empty
The bed
Has never felt colder
The nights
Have never been longer
And my heart beat
Has never been slower

There are times my arms ache
To hold someone else
Because this heart break and loneliness
Is slowly killing me

I still feel your fingertips
Tracing my skin
The way your lips
Always tasted like smoke
Is imprinted in my brain
I memorized
Every line
On the palm of your hand
And I can't forget
I can't forget
You

Is there a cure
For the brokenhearted?
Some type of fuel for the long forgotten?
It seems I'm going down with this ship
I'm the only one whose fallen

In vino veritas
They say that drunk lips
Speak sober thoughts
Maybe thats why every time you say you love me
You have a bottle of ***** in your hands
I'm always scared when you talk to me
Your lips are painted with lies
But I kiss them anyways
Hoping to wipe them clean with mine
But I know thats not how it works
I feel like I'm intoxicated by you
By your essence and aurora
Because my head feels fuzzy
I get giggly
And I feel kinda sick to my stomach
But its the good kind of sick
Ir there is such a thing
And I know that when I wake up
You'll leave me with this enormous hangover
And I'll just lay in bed
Longing for one more touch
Even though I won't get it
Until you tell me you love me
With that ****** bottle of ***** in your hands

I honestly don't want to
Erase you from my mind
Or my lips
Or my fingertips

I'm just so tired of this
Because it makes no ******* sense
I'll apologize
When you're the one who knocked me down
If I were to slash my wrist
I would use my last dying breath
To apologize
For getting blood on your shirt
All you do is victimize
You never seem to realize
That no one even likes you
You like to act like you're so great
And that everything you say goes
You are manipulative
Vindictive
You make everyone around you
Feel like absolute ****
And then guilty
For not doing as you say
You pompous ****
You're nothing but a *****
Upset
Because you've got a tiny ****
And you make up for it
By acting like one but
It doesn't make you desirable
Just liable
For all the stupid **** you say
I remember the first time you told me to go **** myself
I contemplated it
I held the blade in my hand and thought
"If it's what you want, it must be right"
But there has been no greater wrong
You told me my depression
Was caused by myself
And that its a good thing I had an eating disorder
I was getting fat, anyways
As for my anxiety?
"Get over it, quit being a little *****"
And I agreed
I let every word
That tumbled from you lips
To cut me like knives
Because if you say it
It must be true

I tried desperately
To break down your walls
Pounding my ****** fist
Yelling
Let me in, let me in
I can take away the hurt
If you would just let me IN
But really
I'm just asking softly
As tears form in my eyes
And I will keep knocking
Until the skin on my knuckles
Is ripped
The flesh is bleeding
And you can see the bone
I won't stop
Even if my wrist breaks
I won't stop
Until I break down your walls

I'm on my eight shot of *****
And I'm still trying to forget your name
But all I managed to do
Is forget mine
This just goes to show
Even when I'm intoxicated
Inebriated
Incompetent
And incomprehensible
You are the only thing that is clear
In my clouded mind

You kiss me as if you were drowning
As if I were oxygen

You overtake every part of me
Embracing me into yourself
Until I disappear

It's not fair
Because you are the blood in my veins
While I'm just the dust on your shoulders

I give and give
Hoping for something in return
But all you do is take
And I refuse to stop giving

I'm afraid I'll disappear
That you'll become my own oblivion
And you'll take every piece of me
While I return to nothing