I don't love you.* you said.
And my heart dropped down to hell.
The word played over again in my head,
and my tears began to spill.
Why are you yelling?
WHY ARE YOU YELLING?
YOU PROMISED YOU'D LOVE ME TOO.
I'm not yelling, you said; Just telling you the truth.
So is this what you meant,
when you promised with your arms?
When you laid down on  my chest and swore you'd never go too far?
Do you find joy in seeing the eyes you once claimed to have loved,
spill tears of broken glass and the secrets you promised of?
YOU'RE STILL YELLING.
EVERYTHING IS SO ******* LOUD.
Why would you ever say those things when you were just planning to let me down?
Have you noticed this is all questions,
cause you've made me question myself.
Every time I speak or move,
my head is filled with doubts.
Will I lose her, will she come home?
Will she be safe with me again?
I doubt it, it's quiet now.
They must have killed each other,
the voices in my head.

She's everything to me.
She's my light in the dark, my shelter from the rain, my warmth from everything that's cold in this world.
We fight.
A lot.
But through the frustration and the anger and sadness.. All I am ever thinking about is how much I love her.
How much she means to me.
All the moments that I've had with her;
hearing her heartbeat for the first time;
holding her while she cried, while she held my scars in her lovely hands;
watching her rest and seeing her smile so beautifully while she slept..
That makes it all worth it.
Everyday I see her,
Everyday I get to hug her for that one moment,
makes it all worth it.
There is so much I need to say to her.
So much that I wish I could explain so she could see what she is to me.
I can't ever lose her.
She must never go from me or leave me.
I couldn't handle life.
She is my life.
She is everything good and beautiful and  heavenly in this world.
She's my world, my everything.
And I will never leave her side.
I thank God everyday for her and ask that He keeps her happy and safe.
I hope she loves me forever.
Because I love every part of her.
My best friend.
Her.
M.

I love her forever..                         .