There's nothing I've wanted more than the ability to forget.
I've tried but I haven't been able to master it, yet.

I can't forget your scorching touch,
You left scars, more than enough.

You were trying to mask your impotence,
I should've shown more than just indifference.

Tell me did you understand what you were doing, did you notice my change?
Must of since you'd repeatedly ask "Why are you acting so strange?"

I never admitted, never told a soul,
I never seeked help- I turned numb, bitter cold.

Tried to convince myself I was strong, stronger than you.
I was completely wrong, you knew this, too.

You hold so much sovereignty over me,
I still cannot comprehend how this can be.

You knew who'd keep quiet, you knew which prey to choose,
You're so clever, made sure you'd never lose.

Do you know how indefinitely f'cked up I am now?
Are you happy? Are you proud? Do you want to take a bow?

Your time is ending, your death is near,
You'll be gone, yet I'll always have so much to fear..

I feel* very hopeless,
Completely worthless.

I feel the strength oozing out of me,
Pooling up on my bathroom floor- staring up mockingly.

I feel the vibrations of your voice, loud and clear,
They always know where to hit me, just like a spear.

I feel as if I do not belong anywhere I go,
I'm a laughing stock and guess who's the main attraction at this wicked show?

I feel my "loved ones" quickly drifting apart,
I was your rock but reality has crushed me down with a mighty start.

I feel the non believing eyes boring down,
None of you care as deeply as you claim, you'd rather I swallow my misery and hurriedly drown.

I feel you changing your mind about me,
I'm not the person you cleverly made me want to be.

I feel the stomps of your feet though I am thousands of miles far,
You make yourself believe you provided the necessary with a house and a car.

I feel the love I have for you slowly disintegrating,
It's funny how it's your world that is now changing.

I feel myself going crazy, completely insane,
and you're the only one who can carry that blame.

I feel** the way this is going to end,
So let me get the blade, my old friend.

seashell minds, if you
listen closely you can hear
the salt roars of oceans.

the emerald ebb
and flow of ideas that
adds spice to our lives.

we are all drops of
liquid fantasy in this
untamed sea of life.

hope is a reflection
held in a tear
drop. a mention
of beauty in
a wet ball of fear
or sadness. when
all seems unfit,
a reminder that here
is Nature with
a warm touch of beauty
to quell the despair.

question mark eyes,
dust specked with
anguished lies.

his graceless feet
are always dancing
but not to his soul's beat.

songs sung with unknown
notes, so he drowns himself
in the bars that are shown.

perhaps one day, he'll
read the sheet music,
but for now he's still
dancing to the mysterious
tune and he always will.

stuck with what he's got,
tortured by what he sought.

that's the tune of the world.