We howled at the moon
Like drunken fools
Drunk off of joy
Intoxicated with each other
It'll never be the same
I'll miss you this summer

I'm sorry
For hiding
Behind
Empty smiles
Sometimes
It just
Comforts me
To pretend
Everything's okay
For a while

I know I've been
Pretty quiet lately
I haven't been "myself"
But please don't
Forget about me
And run off
With someone else
I guess I just didn't
Wanna push you away
With my sadness
That rolls in
Like ocean waves
I know I've been
Pretty quiet lately
But please, this summer
Remember me

Water dripping
From the faucet
Coffee steam
Billowing up
Into the cool
Morning air
Though there's so much
To be done
I'd much rather
Stay right here

I was taught
That kinks and curls
Were only "pretty"
On little girls
Once you reached
A certain age
You simply must
Keep your hair at bay
Girls of color
Don't let them say
Your beautiful fro
Is just a disgrace
Don't fall into the trap
That is self hatred
Love yourself
The way you were made
And if you choose
To tame your curls
Do it for you
Not the rest of the world

Quick thoughts
Zip about
Like busy bees
Weaving in and out
Of flowering trees
Soon turn into
Stinging hornets
I can't get away
Please someone help me
I can't escape
Trapped within
A dream gone wrong
Trapped within
An awful nightmare
For way too long

Breeze blowing through
Old, rusty wind chimes
I'll always love the sound
No matter how much time goes by
No matter what season
Rain, snow or shine
Just a little breeze
Is all they need
To create a setting
So calm and serene

Walking down
The dark tunnel
Ignoring their screams
I refuse to return
To safety
Balancing on
The train tracks
Like a tight rope
Seems like that's
How life has been
Up until now
Starting to hear
The faint sound
It's drawing near
In its light I'm drowned

She said her thoughts
Swirled around
In her head
Like a merry go round
Children dead
Completely empty
But still going
Round and round
Without anyone knowing

Yawns
Sighs
Sleepy sounds
Crickets chirping
All around
Frogs singing
Just for us
Was it really
Not enough ?

It wasn't exactly
A pin dropping silence
It was more like
A screaming silence
It really was
Way too loud
So my mind filled it
With its own sound
Now I'll never
Be able to escape
The deafening sound
My mind creates

Rows of people
Lined the streets
Their empty eyes
Staring at me
I held my breath
And closed my eyes
But saw the image
In my mind
I couldn't escape
Their glassy eyed gaze
So I joined them instead
And faded away

You are a storm
Your hair
Falls like rain
Your voice
Is soft rumbling thunder
Your touch
Sends lightening
Through my body
Your eyes
Are gray skies
You are a storm
Yet you are
My sunshine

Perfect wives
Living perfect lives
Hiding bruises
Under perfect lies
Perfect children
Can do no wrong
Singing in tune
To their parents song
But I refuse
To go along
With crooked systems
And ****** traditions
I won't sing
I'll scream
Everyone's ashamed
Of me

Tell her you miss her
Tell her you love her
Tell her you'd never
Put anything above her
But don't just tell her
What she wants to hear
When she needs you
You better be near
The rest is for you
To figure out
Don't you dare hurt her
Or you'll have my fist in your mouth

If my heart stopped beating
Would it even occur to you?
If I suddenly disappeared
What would you do?
Would there be a disturbance
In your strange world?
Would you feel an ache in the pit of your stomach
For that troubled girl?
Of course you wouldn't
You wouldn't realize
You wouldn't care
And neither would I

As soon as I saw your face
All feelings were erased
It was you and I
Me and you
Nothing in the world
Could amount to
The relief I felt
To be by your side
To feel your hand
Fit perfectly over mine
It's crazy how
It replays in my mind
Yet for you it was just
A waste of time

Starting projects
I'll never finish
New interest
Now diminished
They say it's the depression
That makes it this way
Or maybe it might be
Just the age

Loud thoughts
Silent cries
Long sleeves
Petty lies
Bottled emotions
On the rise
Laying in bed
Wide eyed

Believe it or not
I'm doing just fine
It's not like I think about you
All the time

I want it to rain
For a thousand days
Not a gentle drizzle
A raging storm
I want to hear the thunder
I want it to pour
Lightening stretched
Over dark skies
Will open up
My tired eyes
I want to lay on the pavement
And feel the water on my skin
And maybe
Just maybe
I'll close my eyes and pretend
That I'm laying under the rain
With you again

Just close your eyes
And try not to cry
Cause tomorrow will bring
Another try at life
It's not over yet
So don't loose your grip
Just hang on tight
We'll make it to the end

Paper skin
Glass bones
Endless sin
Broken homes
Bold bruises
Quiet cuts
Never really
Quite enough

Life is going
Way too fast
What if I'm not ready
To give up the past?
Time is seemingly
Prying it from my hands
And leaving me with memories
Of bright green grass
Sugar soaked smiles
Candy coated days
Now everything's dull
Dismal and gray

To you
Her body
Must be
Uncharted territory
Free and wild
For your fingers to roam
You might pitch a tent
And call her your home
How bored of me
You must have been
To brush past me
Like summer wind
So quickly gone
In the blink of an eye
Not even a chance
To say goodbye

When you ask me
What I'm thinking about
I truly don't know
What to say
There's a world
Inside my head
That takes me far away
It takes me to
A sunny place
Where I don't have to
See your face
Maybe I'm thinking
Way too much
Or thinking
Nothing at all
But the longer I sit
In complete silence
The deeper into my world
I fall

All around I see happy faces
Of course everybody has troubles
To live is to suffer
But in that very moment,
Their faces radiate light like the sun itself
They reflect each other's happiness like mirrors
But when it shines onto me, it doesn't reflect
I'm not a mirror
Instead, I'm a void
I absorb the happiness
And turn it into despair
Maybe I recycle their emotion, and manifest it into the people that live in my head. Maybe that's why my world is so satisfying. It never ceases to amaze me. As I learn new things about the "real world", mine grows. Maybe that's why this world seems to be falling apart. People are dismantling it, and adding pieces to the worlds in their heads. Maybe one by one we'll all disappear into our own little worlds, and this life won't be "real life" anymore.

I'll never forget
The sound of your song
It still rings in my head
It seemingly mocks me
Now that you're gone
How loud it was
It could be heard for miles
It ended so abruptly
I'll miss the sound

I'll always be
Your forever flower
Through December snow
And April showers
Please love me
When I'm no longer vibrant
And resilient
Please love me
When my petals are dull
And wilted

I'm tired of hearing
My own voice
I'm tired of listening
To the same songs
I'm tired of seeing
The same things
I'm tired of this
****** town
Everything
Sounds the same
Everything
Looks the same
Everything
Blends together
It's yours to interpret
What it means

Walking along
The side of
The highway
Under the
Drizzling rain
Cars pass
Me by
As if they're running
From me
I see my life's events
Flash
In the reddish
Glow
Of their tail lights
Their wheels
Spray up water
Drenched in pain
It feels so cold
My hands in my pockets
Are the only thing
That feels like home
I'm tired of walking
This road alone

Laying in bed
Wide awake
Thinking of nothing
Mind blank
Hypnotized by
The sound of the rain
Daydreaming
The day away

I want to get lost
In your garden
Forever
Where things are okay
Where there's perfect weather
Canopy trees
Shelter me
In the grass
Life teems
Untouched and raw
Completely wild
I'll drift away
All the while
The world goes on
Beyond the trees
My thoughts at rest
My mind at ease
Leaves cast shadows
That dance on the ground
My ears are drenched
In the sweet sound
Of birds singing
Wind chimes ringing
Squirrels scurrying
Our soft laughter
Who knew
Such a perfect place
Could exist
Why can't life
Always be like this?

I inhaled you
And I felt alive
I wont exhale
I'd rather die

A shooting star
Moved through the sky
It was gone
In the blink of an eye
But I didn't blink
I kept my eyes wide
I'll never let go
I'll never say goodbye

The taste of you
Is still in my mouth
It once was sweet
It tastes bitter now
It won't seem
To leave my tongue
It tastes so bad
I want to jump
Out of my skin
And run far away
To back when I used
To love the taste

Life dangled from your fingertips
Death in your palm
I couldn't help but grab your hand
I knew it was wrong

I'm convinced that
My insides are
Clockwork
Instead of organs
Some screws are loose
Some wheels are stuck
I'm pretty sure
They're covered in rust
But when you touch me
They start back up
Being around you
Is just enough
To shake me from this
Lethargic state
I fall into
The longer you're away
The worse it gets
I'm hoping that
When you come back
I'll still be able
To reach for your hand
I hope that you still
Remember who I am
Or has time erased
My face from your mind
Like footprints
In the sand?

Douse my brain
In alcohol
Into the abyss
I slowly fall
I watch as stars
Pass me by
My arms hang limp
Too tired to fly
If I could grab
All the stars
Those near
And those far
White
Blue
Hot
Cool
I'd burn my skin
To bring them to you
But even stars
Cant make you love me
You don't care
That I'm falling
You wont be there
When I reach the ground
You wont hear
The gut wrenching sound
Of my bones cracking
Against the earth
Of my blood splattering
On the dirt
If there's such thing
As spirits and souls
I hope that mine
Dies with my bones

I'm a mess
And you're okay
Maybe I'll forget
About all this someday

I'm feeling like
I just cant hold on anymore
You were my world
I was barely a portion of yours
I didn't expect you to love me
I just thought that you'd care
Now it seems you're out of reach
You said you'd always be there

Im sure these feelings
Are hot as flames
But I've felt them so many times
I know them like my name
Like the back of my hand
Like the words to a song
Like frequently traveled land
They barely even feel wrong
But I know that I shouldn't
Feel this way
Many things have happened
Since yesterday
But its just so hard
To put these memories on the shelf
Its as if they keep falling off
All by themselves
Or maybe you're an earthquake
That makes them fall
Like hundreds of paintings
Off the wall

Your fingers danced
Along the strings
Producing pretty sounds
To which we'd sing
Your voice so quiet
So sweetly low
Hummed in my ears
I loved it so
The smell of the fire
Hung in the air
We sung the night away
Without a care
The fire went out
Your fingers tangled in my hair
The morning came
And chilled me to the bone
But I was okay
I felt at home

You said my name
And I melted
You touched me
And I felt it
Your warmth reached
Every part of me
There's nowhere
I'd rather be
I've searched my skin
For your fingerprints
Over and over and over again
But they're no where to be found
And you're not around
It'll never be like it was back then

If I screamed would anyone hear it?
If I stabbed myself would I even feel it?
My existence is drowned out
By the sound of the rain
I'm caught in the storm
I'm drowning in pain

She's been hurt a thousand times before
She cant take it anymore
She's built up walls, and an iron door
She's trapped within her own endospore

The days are going
Way too fast
It's hard for me
To even keep track
Time slips through my fingers
Like soft beach sand
Memories that linger
Are like paper cuts on my hands
So in moments when time
Seems to slowly drag by
I try to embrace it
Instead of wondering why

Parched throat
Dry lips
Skin stretched
Over bony hips
Prominent collarbones
Sunken in eyes
Irises the color
Of Pennsylvania skies
Atop her shoulders
Rests her head
She's very much alive
But looks so dead
Her breath escapes
In shallow pants
Her slender fingers
Comparable to spiders
Crawl over her hair
Of black, silky webs
Effortlessly perfect
Yet endlessly hurting
You'll always be worth it
So don't you worry
Beauty truly is
A burden of it's own
Beauty can't survive
Being alone  
The unlovely
Make beauty
Beautiful