What happened
Between then and now
Or whenever it happened
I can't figure it out
What made you decide
That I wasnt enough?
That I wasn't worth your time?
That I wasn't worth your love?
I can't keep blaming you
For the monsters in my head
They've been around for a while
But they took over when you let
They're moving things around
Re-arranging my brain
So much has happened since you've gone
So much has changed

You never gave me a reason
So I came up with a few myself
I actually came up with a lot of them
Searching for some resolve
I've come up with so many ways
So many things I've done wrong
I'll never be anything
I'll never be what you want

I was so scared to loose you
So I followers you away
I followed you to the ends of the Earth
And ascended into space
Now I can't breathe
Without oxygen around me
And you've gone away
I can't go back now
No one understands
Twinkling stars
Glowing hands

Relying on numbers
And blank screens
We walk around headless
Mindlessly
Somehow convinced
That we know what it means
Yet we wander
Aimlessly

Staring into the darkness
Something stares back
Small pools of moonlight
Occasionally switching to black
Only to open again
And simply stare at me
This thing in the darkness
Is driving me insane
I tried to call out to it
I gave it different names
The eyes simply gazed at me
The thing silently remained
And in a fit of madness
I screamed into the night
The mirror broke
I was alone
The thing in the darkness was I

I wish I could stop moving
And never move again
All these worthless, empty words
They'll never understand
All these sessions I can't remember
Every ticking office clock
All these things I wouldn't ever
Think of now refuse to stop
Chanting over and over
In my overwhelmed head
I want to rip out my hair and scream
I wanna tell everyone I wish I was dead
I want to go to the busiest place
In this wretched town
And finally loose control
Throwing myself on the ground
I want the police to come and restrain me
To put cuffs on my wrists
I want them to lock me away where I belong
And allow me to be consumed by the things in my head

It'll start out
With some girl you met
That made you laugh
That sat by your desk
It'll be the beginning
Of the same old pain
That I felt the last time
Someone went away
I can feel it now
Though comfortably numb
It'll hit me soon
In the same cold rush
As opening the door
On a cold winter's night
How many more days
'Till I lose your smile?