So I sit in the corner of the room
And I will myself to conjure something
An aura
A pulse
A telepathic beacon
Anything.

I can almost feel my bone marrow
Shudder and weep
Against this powder keg of neurosis.

I just want that eye contact from a stranger,
That speaks a language
Beyond that of the most effacious of tongues,
And stretches beyond time and space
To comfort me.

“I see you
And I understand
And I know you and I love you
Even though we have never met.
You are beautiful
And you shouldn’t worry so much.”

More than this;
I wish I had the power to do this for someone else.

The rain in the air falls like strained whispers.
The pebbled ground under my feet tingles from each single contact made
With every cloud’s tear-release.
The cold that chokes the outer world
Pushes us closer together,
As if we are two caterpillars,
Whom for the sake of warmth join
In one singular silk-thread cocoon.
I can feel a thousand invisible hands
Against my back, nudging me closer.
Your hands are holding my face;
They are so soft and sure,
These must be the hands of an angel.
Your angel’s palm on my skin
Spreads a blush over my face,
A blush that I alone feel
And the night’s dark alone sees.
Or can you feel the heat?
Space and seconds materialize away…away…
Now both our mouths taste one another's saliva.
Moister takes over the dryness that was, in that space before.
Between your angel’s palms,
Between your lips,
Between the cold that envelopes this cocoon of perfection,
I am a diamond tear that in the space of something never known,
Has no wish, no thought or desire.
I am a diamond tear,
Between your angel’s palms and lips.

You almost kissed me,
and you shouldn't have.
On the gingham tablecloth in the yellow light,
you lifted me from the counter top onto my feet
putting your hat on my head and tickling my ribs.
You know it's my sweet spot,
leads straight to my heart if you're gentle enough.
I told you to stop and you walked away,
eyes lingering on my bare skin between where my top ended on my waist
and where my dark denim jeans began to hug my hips.
I flipped my hair back around, joining in some conversation too late
between a girl drunk on grape juice and a wedding crasher straggler
in a forest green flannel with camel cigarettes in the pocket.
That's when you came back over and started yelling
some story that happened to you the night before.
You told it well,
the circle captivated, me mesmerized
by how blue your eyes stayed all this time without me noticing.
You  had the whole room laughing with your wit and stupid vernacular,
but I was smiling because you looked so beautiful in those drunken
honest moments
where I recognized the person beneath the banter
where I saw you.
I was saying my goodbyes to the carhartt boys and their one night girls
when you grabbed me by the hand and spun me around
like we were dancing,
pulled me in by your hand pressed on my shoulder blades
the other around my waist
I gasped as your lips almost touched mine,
but then you looked down at me
with those same blue eyes
and took a deep breath,
slowly letting your hands glide down my back then to your sides.
I just stared back at you,
wishing you'd forget the logic and put your hands back where they were,
tracing your lips with that almost kiss,
and I could feel how much you wanted to be in this moment
desperately searching for a way to my lips
but something stopped us.
And I think it was because we knew it would only lead to something messier
than where we were at
it would be a backwards romance, reversing our ***** footsteps
in something we've tried and tried to understand
that it never works out the way either of us plans.
We were both doing so well, moving on
but in that moment we almost gave all that strength up
gave into something too tempting and too wrong.
Because we can't really stay away from each other all that long.
I mean,
you almost kissed me
and you shouldn't have,
but I swear
I wish you would have.

I know what it is like to feel passion;
the way my skin tingles at your touch
Leaving me breathless and wanting more.
The two of us entangled in the darkness.
your blinds drawing shadows across my figure
As your fingers gently graze my cheek.
you penetrate my soul with your own
and I feel so close to you it hurts.

I know what it is like to love another;
denounce your whole being unto him and trust
Him with the power to destroy your essence.
He will never know what he has done to me.
He will never know the power he has over me.
He will never know the passion I have for him now.

I know what it is like to be in love; for
I am captivated by your eyes,
by the upturned corners of your mouth
and most simply by the feeling I get around you.

She wore black velvet on a blue moon summer night, she heard the blue birds sing, she's losing her friends and family, the shattered roses sit on the floor, turn to the sunset my love, watch the light turn blue and fall apart, as the cigaret smoke clears and the wind blows, the car lights come through, screams go through out the air and as you lay there, the kiss of the softest rain falls on your lips, as the vine rings around your finger, will you just fall in love with me so we can be forever.

I hear you
like the ringing in my ears
in the time
between consciousness
and dreams

fading scar tissue on my skin
feels so far from healing

aggressive breath
anxious sweat
pearls at the base of my neck

like puddles reflecting
that one lit up window
that spoke volumes
on the subject
of loneliness
and surrender

smog drifting higher
hugging the sun
in its suffocating embrace
so let the kids play
because tomorrow
the headlines could tell you
that it's finally time
to give up
give in
give away
anything
and everything you tried to save

cough like
your eroded throat
is the holy vessel
and your pain is scripture
pretend you didn't repeat
the things you pretended
to not have heard
so give me your last breath
and I give you my word
I'll never let your anguish
be remembered

so come on
and cough.

Melting madness and shimmering isles
The bubble-gum boils in drug pedophiles
Let's teach the East to love Western style
We come in with strap-on's and pillage with smiles
The rest of the world watches their watches
People keep saying we're at hour eleven
We're changing the design on our gold lockets
From a heart to a blackjack, Seven Seven Seven!

The college boys assure you that they know the lyrics
And the meanings behind them for they've been enlightened
They swarm out like locusts and pretentiously parrot
Verbatim the textbooks they read when they're frightened
That they'll die with nothing to show for their efforts
They want everyone else in the world to remember
That they did exist on some scale of importance
Even though we're just spun yarn of grass, dirt and oceans

Intelligence streams the consciousness seeds and conscientious objectors it seems
So pardon me for the fallacy of pardoning tyrannical dictator queens
It seems these days to be discovered you need to cheat on your spouse or your lover
You'd think that with all the war crimes we've seen we would have hung at least one or the other
We've got two parties, so pick one or scram! (Look at them squirm as fast as they can!)
They're starting to think for themselves again! Quick, strangle the market and feed this man
Acid and bath salts and give him some tear gas and send him on in to disarm the smear traps
And **** everyone so we'll jump to conclusion with no where to turn, the final solution!

I'm drunk again and we're falling in, the shoreline is riddled with explosions
We don't speak of the war, we have no comment, we're almost out of original content
We're frantically searching for a brand new contest to prove that our nation is still the best
Whether you're China, Russia, Israel, Pakistan, the U.K., or India, the U.S. or Japan
Let's take all the gangbanging **** out of Oakland and drop them in to the Atlantic Ocean
Or better yet, set them loose in Uganda, let's see how long they last in Rwanda.
I'm done with religion and socialized medicine, this aristocracy of pull and deception
So for once in our lifetimes, let's seek a vision, because God knows people can't make ******* decisions.