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here's how it begins:
you're driving along exit ninety five and suddenly
his favorite song comes on the radio and it still knocks
the air out of your lungs it still shocks you and
sends you into a spiral of flashbacks and memories of
him humming and mouthing the lyrics unconsciously and
he's tapping the window to the beat next to you
and you're laughing and telling him to stop because he's
distracting you ******* it he's always distracting you
and the car behinds you honks it's horn and the memory
of his hazel eyes leave you almost as fast as they came
it reminds you of a curve ball and now you're thinking
about baseball which reminds you of him because he loves
baseball and it's awful and you barely make it home in
one piece but you do, not necessarily because you want to
but because you needed to see him one last time,
you needed to read all the letters he wrote you because you
needed a reason to keep living you need a reminder
of why you can't give up but instead he texts you a lyric
from her favorite song and you introduced him to
that band before but he never really liked it until she did
and your hands are shaking, your eyes are blurry and
that's it you don't need anything else, no letter or song or
picture will ever fix anything because there's no hope he
is not yours anymore and he never will be so you
climb into bed and cover yourself in blankets even though
it's fifty degrees because your heart is freezing and
that is all that really matters

(h.l.)
therapy by all time low
i am not pretty i am not beautiful i am not
poetry i am not music i am not inspiration i am
not good luck i am not strong i am not lucky i am
not smart i am not a relationship i am never looking back
i am mondays i am not fridays i am not red or blue or
gray or black i am not a disaster i am not a tornado
i am not a hurricane i have no eye in me
i am not captivation i am procrastination i am a constant
dark sky there is no light in me i am not honesty
i am a bundle of never ending lies i am insomnia i
am a biting insect called insecurity i am not a butterfly
i am not a night owl i am more like a tree that never grows
i am not sunshine i am not the moon i am not a star i
am an asteroid i am a college workload i am an infinite
amount of excuses and insults loving me will not
be like falling into a cocoon of warmth it will be
more like being tied to a rock in the middle of the ocean
i am not a model type skinny i am instead a bag of twigs
i am not a calm swim i am drowning i am your last shot of
***** that turns into 20 i am the penny stuck to the bottom
of a jar i am lost money i am scalding hot chocolate
i am times square i am letters i am gigantic words that you
can't pronounce i am late night studying i am your favorite
coffee shop that closes early i am not the girl that
you will spend the rest of your life happily with i am the
key to a motel door and a night you will regret i am the
one night stand you wish you could stop thinking about
i am auto correct that is never right i am the phone number you
cannot forget i am reliable i like to think about running away
but i never will spending your life with me will not be happy but
it will also never be sad because i cannot stand to see
people sad even though sometimes i am and i use big
words and if you can't pronounce them then i'll teach
you how to and i procrastinate all the time but i'll help you
be organized and i'll wake you up early so that you can
get to your favorite coffee shop and i'll warn you that the
hot chocolate is scalding hot i'll cut you off after your
last shot of ***** and i'll write you bad poetry that'll make
you laugh to make up for it and we'll spend the
entire night watching bad romance movies and cursing
love so that you can try and forget that one night stand and
because i never learned how to swim i always stick by the
life guard so i'll save you if you drown and i am not
perfect but i am also not broken; instead i am a never ending
cycle of both regret and loneliness and so much more
but i'll make sure that you'll never have to suffer any of that
because i am your july thirty first thoughts, and you are mine

(h.l.)
don't ask me how this happened because i wasn't even planning on writing a poem. also the line "i am not a hurricane i have no eye in me" is from @hs_poetry on instagram
 Aug 2015 Cristina Dean
daniela
charlie chaplin
once told his daughter
that her naked body should only
belong to those
who fall in love with
her naked soul.
now,
my soul’s hardly naked.
it wears layers and layers
to keep hurt out,
sometimes to keep love out.
but if you can manage
to strip me down,
my soul bare,
and the rest of me clothed
but ******* shivering
like a little kid who got
caught in a blizzard,
trying to catch snowflakes
to keep under my tongue;
if you manage to pull that
all away
and strip me down
to a mess of
private parts –
the parts i don’t tell people
about,
the parts i sectioned off
and hastily labeled
mineminemine
because i wasn’t ready to
share myself,
and the parts of myself
i deemed too fragile
to withstand
your gaze.
you see,
i don’t dismantle
my walls
for just anybody.
but if you strip me down,
past the things we all use
to hide out,
maybe you could love
my naked soul.
i’ve never been the kind of girl
who liked the idea of
“belonging”
to someone but
there are much worse fates
i could think of
than belonging to
you.
this is 2+ years old and somehow i still like it
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