i understand an evil urge,
you can talk to me

i understand a binge and purge
of all of kinds of things

i'll do my best to soften words
hard to believe

i promise if you want that
you can talk to me

I bought a pack of pens
The nice ones
But I'm anxious so
I only look at them
I bought the pens yesterday
I've opened them
The nice pens
But I'm anxious so
I haven't used them
Even though I
Am very curious
About the ink
And if it
Flows fluidly
Or paints itself
In the depression
Of the pressure
From my hand
There is one sitting in front of me
A nice pen
I'd like to know how it writes
But I'm anxious so
I can't pick it up
It sits
I have so much to say
But I am anxious so
Maybe later
I'll have forgotten
What it was
I ever wanted
To write
With the nice pen
In the first place

pop visions,
ever-present
pop visions
cloud my dreams and nightmares,
follow us into the bathroom mirrors
where we powder our noses,
vibrant and tired.

energy, channeled
from the TV channels,
transmitting waves of hate
below perception.
Speak in subtle undertones,
control all of the animals.

pervasive, invasive
pop visions
warp my form and leave me
listing
for something so
familiar and foreign.
my best friend and most
threatening enemy.
And though I denounce it,
what would I be without it?

it seems there's no escape.
things have always been this way.

even in rejection,
all too fitting a reflection—
all consuming,
all consumed by
pop visions.

If you think no one can change
then you believe this of yourself
and if you think this of yourself
then this is why.
Don't listen to the parts of you
that don't tell you the truth
should they benefit
if you believe the lie.

a brand new
atmosphere
to breathe in
made of
whispers
from my dreams
lifts my heavy
heart to light
new stardust
decorates
the night

brand new
air to
fill my lungs with
scent of nectar
to collect
and lubricate
our twisted
tongues with

brand new
sweetness
like a wholly
different
world bloomed
to become it

The sunflowers' heads
hang heavy with beauty—
it would mean nothing to me
but I seeded the dirt.
I can stake them and tie them
and they will comply,
smile and greet passersby,
but I know how they hurt.