Everyday seems like
the worst of the worst.
What have I done
to be placed
upon this curse?
I swore at the sun.
I swore at the air!
I've never found,
solace,
a n y where.

I don't know where to go.
I don't know where I am---
it seems.
Please,
wake, me, up,
from, this,
dream.

Everyday seems like
the worst of the worst.
I've toiled and toiled
under the beating rays
of a wrathful sun
to quench this
vehement thirst.
I swore at the moon.
I swore at the rain!
I don't know
what will roll first.
My tears, or this droplet
on the windowpane.

I don't know where to go,
I don't know where I am---
it seems.
I, just, want,
to, wake,
up.

But then a gentle
sunflower is what
I saw.
Winter's icicle shards
began to thaw.
A rainbow coalescence
of dreams in paw's reach.

Everyday seems like
the worst of the worst.
Then everything changed
when we
met.

I don't know where I am!
I don't know where to go---
it seems.
Yet I feel like
I'm, at, home,
with, you.

I hope you feel
the same way
too.

Sometimes,
I would like to rest my eyes;
take a deep breath;
enter my sarcophagi.
My happy time machine.

Awaiting for the time
where I
would find myself happy,
and only happy.

Gone of the days:
When I treat my lungs like a chimney.
When I poison myself up to my limit.
When I get hurt because of love.
And when I would gaze upon myself
in the mirror,
I would find myself,
to be the man that I wanted to be.

Wish.
I could only wish.
My time capsule seems to be busted.
It used to work,
but it is now rusted.
Exhausted.
Exhausted, of being exhausted.
Exhausted, of being myself.
Exhausted, of existing.
But with enough wishful thinking,
I think I would arrive at my destination.
Someday-----
I wish sunflowers never wilt.

I've got a lot of friends,
but I don't hear from them;
not anymore.

I've met them all
last summer.
Let's just say
it was in a cabin.
Let's just say,
maybe,
it's now their coffin.

Lately, I've been getting phantasms.
I've been seeing them
staring back at me,
white,
blank,
starry eyes;
standing amidst
tall colonies of wild grass.
When the sun
changes its hue into black,
it sends a frightful shiver
down my spine.
Their bodies morph
into a demonic *******
of an amorphous blob
with several human legs
and slick tendrils
pouring out
off their orifices.
Their eyes sinks back,
their brows and lashes shed,
their eyelids seal shut.
Out of their mouths
emerges a fist-sized eyeball.
Their skin secretes
inky mucus
which fuses them together.
Then they begin to chant.
I couldn't make sense
of their eldritch gibberish
blasphemies at first,
but after you get used
to the terrors they spew,
you could hear them saying,
"Nyarlatothep heeded
thy call.
Nyarlatothep heeded
thy call.
Nyarlatothep heeded
thy call."

Months have passed since.
I just want to tell my lovers,
that their slumber
is for the betterment
of all existence.
The sky looks
like an eternal void;
devoid of life.
The Black Pharaoh
reigns in the cosmos.
All hail Nyarlatothep.

Her chariot
glimmering off
feint blue dust.
Lighting up
dwarfish torches
in the night sky.
Selene rests above
in her crescendo;
shrouded by
a gentle
spectral shawl.

She watches me,
as my weary back
relaxes on
a lonesome headstone.
They keep me company.
Selene,
a silver flask,
and my revolver.

"What could I have done
to change this fate?"
Selene remained quiet,
and stared back at me.
"What is life's essence?"
In which, still,
she replied
with silence.

The bitter
winter zephyr
rustles against
my flowing locks.
She smiles at me.
She's beaming.
She basks me
with her radiant presence.

"How did you get up there?"
Her eyebrows
arched at me.
"How did you folks
become haughty
and powerful?"
In which, still,
she replied
with silence.

The gentle winds
turns into
a roaring behemoth.
Vehemently howling
amidst pine trees
which surrounds me.
I took the last sip
of bourbon
from the ol' tin.

"How could man
swim against
Chronos' current?
How could man
muster strength
against the Fates?"
For the nth time,
she replied
with silence.

The frigid muzzle
nips my forehead.
Sweat trickles
down my temples.
I could hear
my own heart
drumming.
My hands
are shaking---
almost vibrating.
My breath
releases
sullen spirits
from this
broken vessel.

Before I closed my eyes,
Selene gleamed at me,
before hiding behind
her faint shroud.

I bowed down,
said my final prayers,
and concentrated
on my friend's
farewell kiss.


"So, long, Selene.
When, I, wake, up,
I, wish, I, would,
reek, of, sunflowers."
---
---
---.