My mind is a little street beggar boy
covered in scars and sores,
freezing by a bus stop,
no blanket nor expecting any.

                 …Tell me:
if you could remove
pain or fear
from your life
which would you choose?

Mind is a little beggar boy.
In a street market.
In a riot.
Not pretending
that a life of despair
is good enough for him
when it isn't,

more free,
more free,
so far surviving
slum and street,
decorated
with scars,
just as he is

meant to be

A lifelong promise
Is broken in an instant
With a court date
And a stack of papers.
Fights and arguments
And misunderstandings
Have broken the bond
Between two that seemed
Inseparable,
In what feels like just yesterday.
They tore apart the one thing
All humans need;
All humans strive for.
How can something so strong
Fall apart so easily?
Didn't you promise?
For better or worse?
In sickness and in health?
"Till death do us part"?
I'm afraid.
This chain of broken marriages
Seems to be hereditary;
But I am also fearless
Because now I know
Just what not to do.

Home,
I’m going home,
Words I hear all the time.
Words that I envy,
Syllabic distress…
Jealousy.
What is home?
For you, it’s the place
You’ve lived for eighteen years.
The place where both parents
Welcome you with open arms.
Laughter
Smiles
Hugs
Kisses
That’s not my life.

What is home?
The place where I moved
When I was thirteen?
A brown shingled roof that hides
Hurt, divorce, a mixed family
That will never get along?
Screaming, yelling, fighting,
Something different every time, and
They wonder why I want to leave

She sits there pretty with eyes that call me near,
and it's clear,
the sun shines down on me
if only for a moment,
I am free
Now I don't know what went wrong,
the sea has yet to calm,
and the storm has begun,
as we stand wishing,
waiting for the sun,

No, I'm not what you wish me to be,
who I am is not who you wish to see,
but I am here nonetheless,
ask of me nothing more,
nothing less,
everything but you is meaningless,
I see you smile,
and now I can finally feel how it feels to feel okay,
I live to fight another day,
If only for a moment,
I am free,
and the sun shines down on me,
Now, I don't know what went wrong,
the sea has yet to calm,
and the storm has begun,
as we stand wishing,
waiting for the sun

Some time has come to pass,
and the sunshine has all but disappeared,
can you see through my eyes?
Can you see anything at all?
Take a picture from my point of view,
can you see what you've become?
No longer does the sun shine through,
you say you love me with all your rage,
I find it hard to believe,
hard to breathe,
hard to see,
your heart's a dusty book now,
I can't stand to turn the page,
can't stand to take a peek
at why you're so ashamed,
why you are so crazed,
but act oh so brave,
at times when I'm so afraid,
I don't know what went wrong,
but you are gone now,
leaving me to drown,
the sea has yet to calm,
and the storm has begun,
as I stand here by myself now wishing,
waiting,
waiting for the sun,
but it's not sunny anymore.

Alone in a cold place,
No escape is in sight.

All my thoughts are against me,
But I can no longer stand and fight.

I'm drained and empty of emotion;
Not a trace of a care.

Leaving a huge opening,
For the negative thoughts I can't bear.

Everything adds up,
One issue after the next.

Then they give me their problems too,
The only time I'm worth a text..

But I listen intently,
I let them speak their mind.

I take in all their pain,
And then it becomes mine.

My so-called 'best friends';
That's definitely not what I see.

How can they expect me to really care,
When they won't even try to for me?

So I'll pretend that I'm okay.
Not that they can really tell.

I'm dying on the inside,
And so I wish them all well.