I treat myself with a little more respect each day.

I can't cut
No more
No
No
No
I promised

But the feelings are so strong
Overflowing me
I need them to pour down my arm
And out of my body

I can't
I can't be that weak
I just need to breathe
...
My lungs fail me

But no
No
No
I can't reach for it
Not allowed
Not anymore
Done with that, right?
I really just want to grab the knife
Razor
Needle
Anything
And end this misery
At least soothe it a little

But no
No
No
No
I can't

You

I love you
Forever and always

I try so hard
To understand.  

Sometimes we are so aligned
and other times so maligned.

You have hurt me
So many times

These last few years
But I forgive
I give you

hell and
Another chance
To come back to me
To come back

To love.

And I’ll keep doing it
until you find your way

Back to me.

Loneliness is a record player
Sitting in an attic
With no record

It is when you look into life’s mirror
And see you’re not alone
You see the monster of your mind creeping up behind you
Whispering loud enough that only you can hear

Loneliness is the loudest silent scream of them all
Yet no one can hear how loud you feel it
Through any bathroom stall

We're living in these days at hand
The fall no less, the sin of man
Have caused a stir of fanning flames
In questioning, did God really say?

A sign of the times, this age-old lie
Working ever since our sense of pride
Both as of late and back in the day
To this date, did God really say?

From ancient times to here and now
So many lies that we've lost count
That over time have never changed
Like the one, did God really say?

The serpent whispered in Eve's ear
She must have not heard it clear
That very day paradise went away
With the lie, did God really say?

Man is so pleased with himself
And yet we still swim in self-doubt
Giving the whole farm away
With the question of, did God really say?