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 Jul 2015
Alyssa Yu
1:00am
I cannot count on one hand
(the) number of times I've fallen asleep to the rhythm of your breathing.
It's hard to believe I've (only) known you for two weeks minus two days.

9:15am
I'm convinced that no(thing) in all of history has ever tasted sweeter than waking up with you on Halloween morning
As your sighs match time with the unfamiliar sound of raindrops
and your arms pull me under the covers to keep warm against the cold.

12:27pm
Pumpkins on the street laugh while the sky cries.
The hours are long when you're gone.
(I'm) not sure how I feel without you beside me.

2:01pm
I met a boy from my past today
who reminded me that my heart is still haunted by the ghosts of all the times I ****** up.
And I'm (scared)
-no, terrified-
that you will not be able to escape the spiderweb (of) failures that I've gotten entangled in.

2:23pm
Homework (is) not an effective distraction.
Trying to write out (how) I feel doesn't seem to be working either.
Maybe that's the consequence of always hiding behind masks: you try to look in the mirror one day and begin to wonder if anything is real.

3:40pm
I shouldn't miss you this (much) after only seven hours.

3:42pm
I shouldn't miss (you) this much after only seven hours and two minutes.

4:01pm
I'm sorry I get in these moods sometimes.
I would blame it on the leaking clouds more often if we weren't in a drought.

4:01pm
What I (mean) to say is that I'm sorry I am selfish when it comes to you.
You deserve so much more than the mess that I am
But I'm addicted (to) you and I can't seem to pry my cold hands from the warm life in your bones.

4:33pm*
I never believed in superstition
And I'm having my doubts about heaven and hell
All I know is that you must've been sent to rescue (me)
Because you are the closest thing to I've got to prince charming and I swear I am under your spell.
 Jul 2015
Alyssa Yu
last week, (i) spent almost every waking moment by your side,
yet my needy heart somehow still missed you terribly in the minutes and spaces in between.
the loneliness had started to find its way back again,
and i think maybe the fire in your soul was the one thing bright enough to burn it away.

or maybe that's not true
maybe it was (just) that you had started teaching me how to light my own matches,
beginning with the night you kissed my scars and read them like braille
and i was hopelessly drawn to the idea of outshining the universe,
since the last thing i ever (wanted) to do was weigh you down with all the ways i wasn't good enough

see, i used (to) feel irretrievably lost, laying awake every night wondering whether i was, or even could be, a good person
because we always (say) that life is short
but someone once reminded me that it is still the longest thing we will ever experience
and i am slowly realizing it might not be too late to become someone (i) don't regret seeing in the mirror every morning,
someone i don't mind you seeing.

this is also a brief apology for writing less lately
poetry was my medium for romanticizing reality
but it's getting harder and harder to create anything more beautiful than the (love) that's been glowing brighter in your eyes
and words can't seem to capture the way (you) smile like it's impossible to stop

i guess what i'm trying to say
is that you were always (too) good for me, miles ahead of the curve
but i would run beside you my whole life
if it meant that one day, i could finally be the kind of person you deserved
 Jul 2015
Alyssa Yu
If you were a storybook character
I would write you as the princess of a kingdom
centuries and lightyears away from this dull planet
finally living (all) the fairytales you once tried to escape to

If you were a storybook character
I would write you as a shimmering mermaid
following the call of (the) ocean and slipping through hands like water
far, far away from those who try to keep you anchored to the surface

If you were a storybook character
I would write you as a woodland faerie
planting sunflowers in every inch of the (world’s) surface
and surrounded by a myriad creatures
from soft bunnies to beasts that only quiet at the sound of your voice

If you were a storybook character
I would write you as (a) warrior
with a bow curved like your smile and arrows as sharp as your wit
eyes blazing, hair flying, feet shaking the earth
as you (stage) a revolution against everyone who has ever tried to **** your spirit

If you were a storybook character
I would write about how you talk like you never need oxygen
how your face somehow shows everything (and) nothing at all
how you quietly notice little things that people overlook
how (you) strive to always do good to others but never to the point of losing yourself
how you love so brilliantly the universe can’t contain it
how you dream big and live boldly because we both know you (are) meant for much more than what they tell you to be

And I know you try so hard to be courageous and good and a hell of a woman
but I just want to tell you that you already are.
(In) all the ways that matter, you are.

Sometimes I wish I really could write you into an epic narrative
a heroine in (its) age-old battle between good and evil,
so the strength and loyalty and bravery I see in you can finally live under the (spotlight) where it belongs

But the one reason I can’t bear to let you become a legend
is that my selfish heart still thinks the greatest thing you do is call me your best friend

— The End —