I'm bored and the title says it all
I really have no life
I only have a girlfriend
(Sorry I mean fiance)
But I'm home alone like always
And there is absolutely nothing
For me to do
Time to start drinking
SALUD!!!

I dream of a broken glass
A broken glass of dreams

Today , when I woke up
the tears were right there
eyes beholding something behind
the feeling which words cannot express
just the language of tears....


what was there the last moment,
and what is there right  now
Tears… ...Tears…… …. & tears………..


This world knows nothing about
Of ,their has been a big drought,
In the valley of the hearts where I lived,
Today I am alone but ……..
Something still there in the heart of hearts,
Pushing me up to shed
Tears…………..tears………..& tears…………………………




is there no way???
it is not easy for
me..........................
i cant

One day, I'm begging for help, screaming and crying
Another day, I'm silent, knowing that I don't deserve it.

Thus, I end up getting help when I don't feel I deserve it and not getting it when I desperately need it.

*I hate rollercoasters like that.

Darkness closing in,
Growing hard to breathe,
Air running out,
Classical Music Playing in My Ears,
Creating a false illusion of hope,
Driving me insane,
I,
I am fading away with the flicker of the flame,
Dissolving into a mist,
Life grows cold again,
The Bittersweet symphony plays on,
Love lashes out,
Grasping my throat,
Choking,
Fighting to Live,
The music grows louder,
Chaos ensues,
The Flame Flickers,
The Candle Wick fades,
No where to turn,
Love once again pushes me down,
Battling for life,
Battling for breath,
Battling for the chance,
The chance to find you,
Whoever you may be.

After years of thinking and considering I know
That I am an Atheist.
Hours on end I have thought about it but the answer was always No you don't  believe
Everyone who does believe tells me that it might be because I am gay and don't like what they say about
           people like me. And if they don't know that I am Gay they say I just haven't let him in my heart
I* will not lie and say it didn't cross my mind that my homosexuality might have been a factor but it's
               not. And I can't let something in my heart when I don't believe that it can even be there.
Saddest person I might be for the ones who tell me that but At least I never Waver in standing for my
     belief.
The answer as to why i don't believe is A) I am more on the science side and B) I just never did.

If you are a lover of words,
you’d understand the
beautiful curse      that befell us,
those who strive and endeavor
with a passion planted inside us
that flourishes and thrives.
Like Athena and her web,
our webs are made of
hundreds of words, woven with
our pencils like needles,
and so we get better at
sewing our works.

A girl
once loved words
wholeheartedly,
but occasionally tried
to let love go
before sewing poems
became her favorite thing
and nothing more.

With you not at my side, i spend my days looking into the blue hills.
I watch them as they guard my homeland and then as time makes them turn  into a deeper state of sadness i watch the skies.
The sky is a vast black blanket with tiny holes that allowed some light to shine through but those holes don't keep me warm and i start to feel the solitude.

Alone with only my breathing audible i feel the cold creep up beside me overshadowed by  the night and i welcome both for i need the company.
Without you i am nothing. Just a mere shell and the only evidence that it still works is the heart that is cracked but still manages to beat, slowly but still manages to beat.

I'm alone.
I am alone.

I am very alone.