I am tired.
Tired of a world where I live by morals.
Why do they not exist for others?

I am scared.
Scared of people.
Scared of what they do to each other every single day.

I am small.
So small sometimes I cannot be seen.

It frightens me.

I am myself. I am an open book. I am a melody.
But why can no-one read me –
Why can no-one hear me –
Am I a different language?
Am I a different sound?

Have you ever been so lonely that you felt quite close to
tears
And your thoughts went racing backwards to the happy by gone
years
To the days when you were twenty, fit and sprightly and
care free
And no challenge seemed too daunting you'd try climb the
highest tree? .

Have you ever felt nostalgic and your thoughts went far away
To the school yard in the lunch hour where you used to romp
and play
With your school friends from the old days have you wondered
where are they
Have they too grown slow and settled do they show their
years in grey? .

Have you ever been in a bar room on a night out with the
boys
Felt the lilt of drunk man's laughter an intrusive sort of
noise
And a sudden rush of sadness bring the teardrops to your
eyes
And you go off to the toilet where your feelings you disguise.

And back home you think about it in the peace and in the
quiet
Whilst the others were so happy I felt down a bit tonight
And you feel you'd one too many and you blame it on the beer
But you've often drunk more liquor and tonight your thoughts
were clear.

Have you ever at house party asked yourself what brought me
here
And you feel obliged to linger though you'd like to
disappear
And the people seem so friendly but you still feel out of
place
And you get the strangest feeling your's is not a welcome
face? .

Have you ever on the train home after working hard all day
Felt your effort has been wasted and at home you ought to
stay
Whilst the boss drives new mercedes you must struggle all
the way
And about that man you work for you don't have good word to
say? .

Have you ever felt your best friend really not your friend
at all
Why he often pass your house by and he seldom ever call
Except when he is after something and for him there is some
gain
And though he claim you are his best friend in your heart
the doubt remain? .

Have you ever been in the company of a humorous sort of
bloke
And there were peals of laughter when he cracked a funny
joke
But the punch line seemed to slip you it went way above your
head
And you were left to wonder why they laughed at what he'd
said? .

Have you ever watched a young man kiss his girlfriend on the
street
And you thought him a bit cheeky felt he ought be more
discreet
But you silently were wishing he were you and you were he
And your feelings on the matter only sprung from jealousy? .

Did you ever meet young lady and she smiled and looked your
way
And your ego felt inflated she had helped to make your day
Till you realized much later for you she could never fall
She was just a friendly stranger and no feelings there at
all? .

All these sort of situations you will meet along life's way
And this game of life and living is no easy game to play
In a simple situation a great challenge we can see
And this thing called human feelings is too big a thing for
me.

If I lay the stars out for you tonight,
Tell me, would you stand under them with me?
And If I could get the moon to shine just right,
Could you pretend you were the one for me?

Could you spend the night with me under a starlit sky,
Pretending theres no such thing as the morning sun?
And if the planets and stars would comply,
I'd make sure morning would never come.

If I could, I'd show you what it's like to fly,
And we'd sail through the night.
If I could use the clouds to sail the winds in the sky,
I'd show you the world from incredible heights.

If I could get the wind to blow the waves just right,
And the birds to sing along,
I'd book the world for the night,
And have them play your song.

If I could lay the stars out for you tonight.
Baby, would you look up with me?
And if I could get the moon to shine just right,
Tell me, would that be enough from me?

you make my heart flutter like the pages of a stop motion sketch pad
you make my voice stutter like a skipping cd track
th- th- that girl is my true horizon
pure perspective through the looking glass
dance stop make it fast
make it slow
make me go in in in
and out of phases like the moon
wane on wax off
stars shining and i am lost
in your constellations
in your subtle body language
i find full conversation
colorful like a diverse nation of words
and thought
bringing movement into still life paintings
you make my canvas come alive
inspire me hire me to enhance your dimensions
dynamic with multiple angles
you've got chimes in your voice
vibrating like wrist bangles
gently placed upon an angels wing
because when you speak you sing
melodies and harmonies
lullabies and symphonies
take me please to live in your music box
and ill be your ballerina dancing when you wind me up
twirling without giving up
faith in you.

you are my muse

you are the object of my poetic affection.

It's not fair that I'll have to see you,
All dressed up and looking perfect, as always.
While I'll be dressed in the usual jeans and t-shirt.
Why?
So many why's.
Too many.
I'm sick of the questions.
I'm sick of the doubt.
I'm sick of the pain.
I just want to throw it all away.
I just want to throw you away.
Why're you forcing me to see you?
Why're you forcing me to feel pain?
Why can't I just remain in the back of your mind?
Why can't you just remain in the back of mine?
Why must you continue to torture me?
Does it make you feel loved?

Death is not the final word.
Without ears, my father still listens,
still shrugs his shoulders
whenever I ask a question he doesn't want to answer.

I stand at the closet door, my hand on the ****,
my hip leaning against the frame and ask him
what does he think about the war in Iraq
and how does he feel about his oldest daughter
getting married to a man she met on the Internet.

Without eyes, my father still looks around.
He sees what I am trying to do, sees that I
have grown less passive with his passing,
understands my need for answers only he can provide.

I imagine him drawing a breath, sensing
his lungs once again filling with air, his thoughts ballooning.

I still taste your sweat on my lips
I still feel your soft skin on my palms
I still smell your scent on the sheets I once slept in
I still hear your sharp words cutting through my ears
I still see your ice cold eyes looking back into mine

I still taste your mouth against mine
I still feel your coarse hair in my fists
I still smell your sleeping body beneath my cheek
I still hear your heart beating into my head
I still see your ice cold eyes looking back into mine