I feel like I should do something important to achieve some important result to feel like I had done something worthwhile rather that sitting here with nothing but a bookmark a few hundred pages in and a screen littered with metawritten words that don't rhyme put in some sequence to represent the flowing of my thoughts some uneven syllable arrangement I want structure like a new London building where the glass is black and unresponsive to the onlooker but from inside from inside the world is clear and unbroken apart from the seams where the glass meets apart from those small strips of darkness because why merely wish for perfection?
The silenced words are 'I think I could love you' due to this chilled heart pumping its last chamber empty over the corpse of his affection and mine laying side by side by the main road arms outstretched because need is what got us in the end. Imperfection has never been an issue until your imperfections made me smile until they made me m e l t and want you through the darkest ditches of your personality. I wonder if you realise that you are insane and I am you, 2/3/4 years ago when innocence, for you, was tangible and honesty was automatic like the gun in my chest.
I glare at the clear and unbroken sky, its blue a hue that made young girls weep as they gazed into some unattainable stranger's eye; I am grass greener than sin chewed by cattle older than time and as I sway to any trickling wind I point accusingly at that clear and unbroken sky because it shunned away the clouds with their heavy weeping cargo of life with their voluptuous bodies that would cushion the chariot as it stops at ninety degrees from my weeping skin; I am a bird lost on the canvas as the backdrop is wiped clean when the chariot thunders past and, blinking, I gaze helplessly - for I am as young as this moment - into the clear and unbroken sky.
He poured the coffee Into the cup He put the milk Into the cup of coffee He put the sugar Into the coffee with milk With a small spoon He churned He drank the coffee And he put down the cup Without any word to me He emptied the coffee with milk And he put down the cup Without any word to me He lighted One cigarette He made circles With the smoke He shook off the ash Into the ashtray Without any word to me Without any look at me He got up He put on A hat on his head He put on A raincoat Because it was raining And he left Into the rain Without any word to me Without any look at me And I buried My face in my hands And I cried