I've got a heartbeat
that's irregular
like the narrative
strings on which
I have danced
throughout my
brief time here
so far

A burst of energy and I'm alive,
My self esteem comes out of hiding
I'm floating on the surface
With the help of a form of aqua
No one hears me,
No one sees
I'm in the middle of a sea
I created myself
Am I dead?
I feel it in my bones,
I should be dead and gone
Life feels worthless when you're alone
I just want a sign,
A reassurance that there is a reason
I'm still alive

I write poetry
for strangers
instead of my friends
because I can't see
my fears and dreams
reflected off the eyes
of strangers they way I can
in the mirrors
that are my loved ones
and looking
at other people is far
easier than looking
at myself
trying to find
the spots that gleam
in the sunlight

i'm really tired of being alone.