Faint-hearted.
Have always been afraid to fail
Scared that what might happen could be something unwanted,
Anchored on the shore not wanting to sail.

Emotional.
A slightly rude word could crush the heart,
Always upset, treating everything as fatal,
Easily feel hurt.

Perfectionist.
Too much attention on a very little thing,
Obsessed of perfection,
Ending up missing to see the bigger picture.

Timidity.
Too shy to speak up,
Doesn't want to get others attention,
So everything was kept hidden inside.

Love.
Wanting to make everyone happy by showing affection,
Trying hard not to hurt anyone,
Ended up making self-sacrifice actions.

Please don't try to tell me that my love is not enough
And please don't try to save me, I am too broken to touch

My shattered glass is poison to your complex hopes and dreams
When you try to comfort me, I'll place you somewhere in between

My smile drifts like butterflies looking into weary skies
You give me happy lullabies, and I give you my tired eyes

You bloom like May flowers
While I rain down like April showers

Soon enough you'll get sick of the rain
And search for something sane.

I thought you and I'd fit together like a railroad and it's train
But your sunshine-sweet weather didn't fit well with my pain

What a shame our colors couldn't blend
But Black loved every shade of Blue until the end

And while I watched blue search for hours,
He'd never find a love like ours.

If you pause awhile and look into their eyes
You would find sadness tinged with surprise
These sentinels of trust, with themselves at peace,
Need your love a little, but you hardly notice.
None really knows what goes on in their head
As they forage in the dirt for a crumb of bread
If they chance upon a scrap in a dingy by-lane
They wag gratefully in the shadow of men.
Food is so scarce though so often they waste
The men are too miserly to share with the rest
Yet they bear no malice as they flock the dustbin
These loyal creatures never know how to be mean.
Today on the street if you see one of them
Don’t just pass by its emaciated frame
Ignore not and notice, it’s there on the street
Waiting for your love in the dust and heat!
Stop awhile and look deep into its eyes
Step out of the shadow and reach it sunrise
See how it returns the love you warmly lend
And rewards you with truly a lifelong friend!

It was 10pm when I decided to leave my apartment
there was snow on the ground
patchy from the dry cold half winter half sun heat
I decided to check the mail
I had been drinking three dollar wine for hours staring at old paintings on the wall
paintings of kansas
paintings of tornadoes
paintings of Van Gough
I had written a poem on the wall
dedicated to the cockroaches and lamp posts of new york city
I wrote it in lipstick and spanish
I opened the mailbox
I felt the moon on my shoulder
I saw a shadow that wasn't mine behind a fence
it was from Florida
a woman I had once fallen in love with
with her brown hair curly like that of smoke of a cigarette
it read “i miss you”
I had decided to die right there
with the half melted snow
the half grown grass that was green and brown
the cigarette butts
the broken glass
with the moon still on my shoulder
a thousand miles behind winters blanket of clouds
I decided to die there
lighting a cigarette
wet from my lips
I lied down
with the orange letter in my hand
with the orange cigarette lightbug in my mouth
smoke dancing out like Amazonian women in heat
I pictured swamps
I pictured the city on fire
I pictured her naked in my hands
giving her self up to me
letting me have her lips and her legs and her stomach and her love
in the distant
behind the city buildings ears and belly button lint and sirens and swing music and the flickering of beer bottle caps and the burning of tobacco
from lips to tongue to throat to lung
then back out
in a ball of stretched smoke
headed only to the clouds up above
which angels and the moon slept behind
It would have been good to die there
the ground felt good
I thought of Texas
rivers
cow skulls on top of lamps
I thought of Mother and her
rose bottled liquor
I hought of Father
and his eyes that were enormous with
poverty and Tommy Hilfiger sweaters
I thought of
Her
alone in florida
full of sun
full of days and full of nights
I thought of Death
and how he must envy me
I smoke cigarettes to make it easy on him
he knows I wont go
without a fight
without spit in his hollow eye
without my blood
on his fur coat
when he comes in winter on a horse
or a Cadillac from the 1930's
I thought of many brave men
drinking their hearts
their bellies
their eyesockets to sleep
with Tall bottles of gloriously cheap whiskey
I thought of war
and I thought of lighting another cigarette
but it was cold
and I decided to go inside
with my windows
with my Van Gogh paintings
with my blind cat who purred at the dishwasher

You're building up a palace
For the world to see
How great you are
But do they know how loud the echo
In your walls.... is outdone
By the echo in your soul?

All pretty things to fill your life
And make you feel so useful
But yet, your day is dark and grey
And you still feel so blue
Oh, the echo in your soul.


Refrain
Why don't you stop....
Why don't you-ooh stop?
And tend your heart
Oh, feed your mind
And fill up your soul, oh
With beauty that
Cannot..... be seen.


It's easier to see your faith by showing
But then you're stuck in a rut
You'd surely nev-er-er leave
Outdone by the echo in your soul
The echo in your life
The echo in your smile
Oh, the echo-oh.... in your words.

It's harder for you to totally live your truth
For, it's not how you LOOK, but HOW you look
Take off the trappings and reveal
And see who you really are
See what you really are
See what you have become!

And now you're feeling all alone in a crowded room
You try to sound intelligent yet make no sense
Your stilted humour is outdone
By the echo-oh....in your soul.




Star Toucher, 26 March 2013

Take me as I am
Or take yourself away.
I'm sick of all your lies
And all your little games.
I'm seeing just how crazy it is,
That I haven't realized this before;
How much you play, and how fake you are.
If I had, I'd have never opened my door.

Trying to justify yourself
By turning things back on me.
But I no longer feel sorry for
The ***** you turned out to be.
Get mad because I 'ignored' you,
When you tried to fake a smile.
Sorry I didn't expect that one,
Haven't seen it in a while.

So now you turn your head away from me
When I tried to catch your eye.
To acknowledge you as you wanted
Intent turned from a sorry to just goodbye.
But if that's really what you wanted,
To walk away alone.
You could've just been honest
And I'd have let you go.

Instead you decided to hurt me more
Pulling me further through this hell.
The burning flames of liking you
Consumed me as I fell.
And you just stood there and watched
Beckoning me farther on that track.
And as soon as I was close enough
You changed your mind and stepped back

Sleeping on the floor
Same clothes on.
Night before,
How many juices of the gods did you imbibe?
Still feeling its heroic effects.
Night filled with swirling, incomplete memories
Shared by your soldiers at your side.
Some may say we fight too hard,
And too often.
We say we fight because we are obligated,
And, to guard our youth
For one more week.