You
kiss the chill
upon my nose
each day
as
I
awake
smiling again
at the pieces of dreams found
fitting perfectly inside these solemn eyes
Caught, just before they disperse in each morn's dewy mist,
opening wide the cold topaz with fresh fires
which burn unanswered questions
into each new
sky
as
I
feel you there
in the warmth of Sun's new embrace
a gentle touch upon my upturned face
Held up, within the stubborn day,
when Normality beckons me
slowly,
Waiting
for shadows to be cast,
so that you may walk amongst them;
on the edge of my perception
Only
to return, later,
in our long sleeps final blink,
to the blissful night where
we dance upon
the stars
again
until,

we almost...

we were so close, this time.

Remembrance hits - I fall to bits.

"Why did you have to die?"

Lately

I think my muse

Is amused by me

I’m confused

Is she tired of being

Misused by me?



Writing only what glorifies my skill

Skipping the substance

And removing what’s real



She whispers

“Write something

So someone can be healed”

But instead I pander

With topics that have

A popular appeal



Sick of the fake

She escapes

Without notice

Just slipping away

Without a trace



Ignoring my invitation

To meet in my imagination

So I may sneak a kiss

Of her sweet inspiration



I know that

She won’t forever say no

Eventually she will come back

And the creativity will again flow

So

That’s why I’ve opened up

Every window

To my soul



I’ve opened the door

To my mind

Hoping that she knocks

But guess who is standing there

…I’m not shocked…

It’s my old familiar foe

Writer’s Block

I met you tonight.
You smelled nice
and I sat next to
you for two hours.
Sure, there was a
fifteen minute break.
But so what? Your
bangs hung straight
across your forehead
and you skirt lay
loosely around your
thighs. Your sweater
clung to you body
and you clung to my
mind. I know your
name and I know
your face but I know
not you.

It was your first time going to a show and you told me you felt like a white crayon.
It was my thirteenth show and I told you white crayons looked very nice on any color paper but white. So why limit yourself?

You had your legs
crossed and your
foot kept touching
my calf and instead
of recoiling I let it
happen. I talked to
you and when I took
my coat off it flailed
in your face and I
said "I'm sorry, sorry."
And you curled your
mouth into a cute
smile and told me it
was really okay, and
then the show was very
good and how many
have I been to. It's funny
how you're cute and I'm
me and you laughed
when I said stupid
things and I let our
legs touch and I even
held the door open for
you and said "Goodnight,
Lady. See you next Monday."
And you said "Goodnight,
Nolan. If fate wills it,
so it shall be." And we
laughed and I begged fate
to will it.

The young boy stuffed his hands back into his pockets and looked down.
His black shoes looked nice against the moldy, rotten, floor of the boat.
Water splashed up onto the back of his neck just as he pulled his hood up.
He had forgotten it was there and his ears instantly felt warmer.
Him, his old man, and his old man's friend had launched the boat 15 minutes ago.
After some trouble they got it started and began across the frosty lake.
The sun was still not up yet, and the temperature was below freezing.
"See the steam rising off the water?" the second old man had asked,
"The water is warmer than the air."

And so they had began their journey.

"Stand up for a sec, James, I need to get to the tackle box."
The boy complied and was surprised to find that it was warmer standing up.
Even with the wind slapping at his face.
Just as his father retrieved the box he shouted "Rich! Stop!"
There was another boat not 10 feet in front of them, running perpendicular to there boat.
Rich slammed the engine into reverse.
He smacked his head on the small windshield in front of him, knocking him out.
The boy's dad fell over and smacked his head on the side of the boat, almost knocking him out.
James went flying. He flew straight over the front of the boat and into the water.
Not even a second later the underside of the boat smacked into his back.
Not even a second after that the propeller from the boat sliced off his left hand
and also chopped down to the bone in his neck.

Time of death was estimated to be at 6:07 A.M.
Rich was alright, the crash causing a minute fracture in the second disk of his neck.
The boy's father was also alight, only re breaking his long ago broken left shoulder.
The single child's mother killed herself six days later.
His girlfriend never dated another boy ever again.
Until she met Bobby, who took her pain away with the knuckles on his strong right.
His father never returned to work, instead drank away his welfare and later his life.
Rich lived almost normally until his daughter was diagnosed with a rare bone cancer,
killing her within weeks of diagnosis.
Then, he moved to Arizona and was killed by a **** dealer.

And the world went on.

everlasting awe
a dance when sighted across the street
goodness, trust, virginity
stars and heights and depths
breathless, breathtaking words
late night is the only time to talk
smilekissing
he sun she moon one earth
the ******* of thoughts
the licking of dreams
youth, old age, immortality
afterthoughts of bliss

I’ve tried words
I’ve tried gestures
I’ve tried tears
I’ve tried letters
I wrote you one recently
About the love you refuse
It’s all I have to give
Still I’m not worthy of you
So like the good book says
If you’re not with me
You’re on the other side
But like a wise man said
Love thy enemy
We’re on the same side

I’ve tried brains
I’ve tried *****
I’ve tried heart
I’ve tried lotus
I opened a petal recently
It revealed the love you choose
And it’s all that I can’t give
To ask, who is worthy of you
So like the good book says
If you’re not with me
You’re on the other side
But like a wise man said
Love thy enemy
We’re on the same side

Please forgive me
I’m broken by misunderstandings
And I’ve turned my insides out for you
But your eyes belong to the world outside
Your eyes…
Your eyes…

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer’s lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimmed;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance, or nature’s changing course untrimmed.
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow’st;
Nor shall death brag thou wand’rest in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou grow’st,
    So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
    So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

My mistress’ eyes are nothing like the sun;
Coral is far more red than her lips’ red;
If snow be white, why then her ******* are dun;
If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.
I have seen roses damasked, red and white,
But no such roses see I in her cheeks,
And in some perfumes is there more delight
Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.
I love to hear her speak, yet well I know,
That music hath a far more pleasing sound.
I grant I never saw a goddess go;
My mistress when she walks treads on the ground.
    And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare
    As any she belied with false compare.

Tonight I saw Orion rise,
And chase the Pleiades across the sky,
The North star shone,
To give direction,
Vega offered introspection,
Ursa Major,
Too much to bear,
Gems of creation,
Everywhere,
Regulas rages in blazes of blue,
So beautiful now,
With the waxing moon,
The only star,
That will not shine,
Is the one,
I thought was mine,
But now you're in,
Anothers sky,
Why can't it be mine?

I will fight for you
If it's the last thing I do

I need you here and I need you now
But I have to ask myself how
How can I, when you're with him
My chances are very slim

My love for you is strong
But what you did to me was wrong
Although my heart aches in pain
In this cloudy rain

I'll take every chance I get
Without any regrets
I will make you mine
for one last time

I will still fight for you
If it's the last thing I do