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Lawren Jul 2015
I am excellent.
Not because I conform
To someone else's standards,
Beliefs, or expectations of me,
But because I choose to live with integrity.
I strive to be the best I can be
Without expecting perfection.
As I am also human.
I falter and fail.
But failure is not the absence of excellence,
It is simply the cataracts that cloud my eyes
And prevent me from seeing
My own arete.
For when I look in the mirror,
All I see is dark spots, blemishes.
And no matter the angle from which I view,
I am inferior, a mistake.
I must first accept my perfect imperfection
And ask for help,
Before the flawed lenses with which I was born
Can be replaced,
And I can finally see with unwavering clarity
That I am a person of worth.
I have significance.
And though I may not always trust
What I know to be true,
It is my intrinsic value as a being,
And not a doing,
That makes me excellent.
The Virtue of Excellence
Lawren Jul 2015
Unity through working together
For we cannot exist without each other.
I need my lungs which need trees,
Who need the sun to rise every morning.
The same sun who kisses my cheek and warms my heart,
Darkens my skin and calms my soul.

As joyful music enters my ears, my mind is quiet
And a gentle smile forms-
Easing left over pain from the day before
Releasing serotonin in my brain, and
Signaling to my body that we will be OK.

Because today is a new day,
A new chance to live harmoniously with the other beings
With whom I co-exist;
To dwell on earth in synergy
With the energy of atoms outside my mortal chassis.
Those which I cannot control
But upon which I must depend
To simply
Subsist.

For alone, I am nothing but
A random collection of carbon and hydrogen atoms
Vibrating at different frequencies.

But with the help of gravity and other natural forces
They are unified into one.
Moving together,
Pulsing together,
To form the being that is me.
The Virtue of Cooperation (07/12/2015)
Lawren Jun 2013
A calm and cool breeze
Passes through the leaves of the trees,
Persuading the branches to sway,
Like algae in a turbulent sea.
Without a cloud in the pale blue Arizona sky,
The sun radiates down-- hot and glaring.
It reflects off the shiny paint of the cars around me,
Illuminates the brown mountains in the distance.
And magnified through the thick lenses of my glasses,
It blinds my sensitive eyes.
The surrounding sempiternal desert
Is so clear and sharp,
That no one nor nothing can hide
(With the exception of the beings who can blend,
And despite my tiring efforts,
I am not one of them.)
The nearest Creosote bush
Eminates of the smell of water,
As it passes through a hose.
I am instantly transported back home
Where sand is replaced by grass and plants
That require regular watering to survive.
When I close my eyes I can see
The illusion of a waterfall, created by the uncoiling hose
As it ejects tepid water for us to traverse.
But upon unveiling my windows,
I allow the sandy landscape to penetrate into my soul
And I am brought back to the present
Where life subsists, illogically,
Through a dearth of water, and inordinate sun.
Lawren Jun 2013
Strength is the ability to protect yourself
Emotionally, physically, spiritually.
You are strong when you need no one
You are self-sufficient
The desire is there sans the need.
Acceptance of lacking in one area
Will allow you and behooves you to
Increase strength in another.
Because without strength you are vulnerable
To external forces.
Like newborn turtles as they make
The dangerous pilgrimage to water,
Picked off one by one,
By carnivorous, unforgiving animals:
People out to hurt others to falsely improve
Their own self-esteem.

Strength is the courage to challenge your fears
And make an about-face to run toward them
Not away.
This abrupt "180" seems incongruent to our
Beliefs, desires and thoughts
Because our subconscious mind proclaims
That to confront our apprehensions deems us
Weak.
And as naive beings, we listen wholeheartedly,
Believing that what we ignore does not exist
And we regress to an age when object impermanence
Unsettled our feelings of safety.

Without strength we cannot breathe, eat or think
And without fulfillment of these basic human needs
The question is, Do we really exist?
So we must define and develop our own strength
In order to thoroughly define and develop
Our sense of self.
Lawren May 2013
Today, my body aches with sadness
For I am caged inside the ribs of this body
And the confines of this mind.
My screams and sobs radiate upward from my belly
And violently explode into silent butterflies
Rising and falling like frantic waves:
Colliding and twisting with every breath.
Inhale.
Wait.
Exhale.
The pause is the most important.
It holds the fear and excitement around life and death,
Right and wrong,
Me and you.
Because we cannot be together.
It’s been too long
Too exhausting, too ugly
And I won’t take your ******* anymore.
We are done.
I’m escaping from the cage
The confines, the prisons
And releasing my butterflies into the sky
To fly any direction they please.
Lawren Mar 2013
Resistance is:
The lack of willingness to change,
A desire for control.
We resist when we feel
Angry or hurt,
Because really we are scared.
The act of resisting takes so much energy,
But yet we continue because
We are slaves of habit.
So we waste away
Robbing our bodies and ourselves of
Everything, anything.
Because we want what we want and
Not what you want.
We have hissy fits and revert back
To our 2 year old selves
Trying to assert our independence.
Denying the fact that we have tied
A brick to our feet,
In the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, and
Proud of finally doing something on our own
We are alone
Sinking.
Unless we resist the urge to resist and
Call out for help
We will continue to sink
Then drown in our pride
Too resistant to try something new
Or do something different.
Lawren Feb 2013
As I sit here in front of you,
I am in awe.
I envy your uniqueness and
Your strength to be different.
Your thick trunk holds you up
And roots you to the ground.
I see the remnants of your traumas:
Cut, infiltrated, branded, punctured
But yet you continue to grow.
Your branches become thinner
As they move away from your body,
By hold the leaves without which
You couldn't survive.
This, your physically weakest part
Makes you vulnerable,
Yet you reach out, steadfast,
Inviting any and everyone in
Because without you we cannot survive.
We must depend on each other
For that which we need.
So here I sit,
Gazing up at your interlacing arms.
Absorbing the wisdom you bring and
Hoping that I can do for you and others
All that you already do for me.
This is the second poem from the tree assignment.
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