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955 · Jun 2011
Sideways Glances
Cassie Mae Jun 2011
I caught the sideways glances
you threw at me.
I imagine second chances.

With each look something advances,
something neither of us can see.
I caught the sideways glances.

With each smile, inside me, a feeling enhances,
a feeling I can't let be.
I imagine second chances.

Forgetting all the past romances
forever I am your devotee.
I caught the sideways glances.

Thoughts of you trap me in trances.
With a fear I'll never be free
I imagine second chances.

Remembering tonight throws my heart into dances.
I wonder what you thought of me.
I caught the sideways glances.
I imagine second chances.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
948 · Nov 2011
Wintertime
Cassie Mae Nov 2011
fading wintertime
blankets of white melt away
exposing cold earth
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
934 · Mar 2012
Hadn't Yet
Cassie Mae Mar 2012
Last night you loved me
we hadn't yet fought
we hadn't yet broken hearts

I hadn't yet blamed you
You hadn't yet left me

Last night there was only us
I hadn't yet kissed another's lips
I hadn't yet turned away a second chance

You weren't ignoring me
You weren't disgusted with me

Last night I dreamt it all away
our fights, our broken hearts
our hurtful words, our feeling of loathing
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2012
881 · Oct 2013
Love Matures
Cassie Mae Oct 2013
The love I had with him
I'll never feel again
It was young
It was naive

When I loved him
I was selfish
He was nonchalant
We were jealous

The love I had with him
was meant for 19 year olds
© Cassie Mae Writings 2013
841 · Sep 2011
When You Smile
Cassie Mae Sep 2011
When you smile
I forget you broke me
and I love you for a little while.

I've stored it in your memory file
things I love to see
when you smile.

To witness I'd walk a million mile
recalling what use to be
and I love you for a little while.

My heart seems to be in denial
I want another shot at us, at we
when you smile.

All the memories I can compile
seem to set emotions free
and I love you for a little while.

Although the ending was hostile
my heart and mind disagree
when you smile
and I love you for a little while.
(c) Cassie Mae Wiritings 2011
826 · Mar 2011
Inhibitions
Cassie Mae Mar 2011
The first time I saw your smile
all inhibitions were lost.

Calling time my own, it's been awhile.

The first time I saw your smile
I knew for you I'd walked a many mile.
I'd do anything, pay any cost.

The first time I saw your smile
all inhibitions were lost.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
811 · Jan 2011
It was so easy
Cassie Mae Jan 2011
It was so easy to get to know you.
Almost like the stars lined up and brought our worlds together.
How cliche, but that's how easy it was.

It was so easy to be with you,
like we had been together before.
That summer could have been the start of an eternity with you.
That's how easy it was.

Talking about the past, the present, and the future was so easy we could have been telling the stories to old friends.

It was so easy to be apart because we knew we would both be coming back to each other at the end of the day.
There was never fear or concern if you were late.
It was so easy to trust you.

It was too easy in those two months to fall in love,
but we both knew you would leave.

It was easy when you drove away the first time.
We knew we would see each other again soon.
Keeping in tough was easy with phone calls and letters.

It wasn't easy when you drove away the second time.
I knew you wouldn't call back and that I'd never get a letter in return.

It wasn't easy a year later when I ran into our old friends or when his eyes reminded me of yours.

It was too easy to fall for you under all the stars.
It was too easy to let you in with the warm summer breeze.
It was all too easy to be so heartbroken when it came to an end.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
Cassie Mae Nov 2013
The sun still sets
and stills rises
without your "good night".

Miles away you sit
watching the same sun
but never thinking of me.

The moon rises
and lights up my room
and the empty pillow beside me.

The moon sets
making way for the sun
even without your "good morning".
©Cassie Mae Writings 2013
793 · Mar 2012
Distracted
Cassie Mae Mar 2012
Distracted
is how I remember feeling when I
saw your eyes sparkle in the fading light,
too young, so naive,
remembering that summer is
accompanied by a rush of emotion,
complete with lust, regret, and it
taught me so much,
even to this day I find myself
d**istracted.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
786 · Oct 2010
Crowded Room
Cassie Mae Oct 2010
In a room of hundreds
it is you I pick out,
it is you who stand outs from the rest.

Your jacket
Your hair,
dark
mysterious

Your face
Your smile,
innocent
young

It is you,
in this crowded room,
I want to be close to
I want to get to know you.

Hold your hand
Kiss your mouth
Be your girl

Be the girl,
in this crowded room,
you want to be close to.
Cassie Mae Writings 2010
782 · May 2012
Lonely Too Long (Suddenly)
Cassie Mae May 2012
Suddenly I miss you
I barely know you
but I want to hear you laugh.

Sitting here alone
the sun fading before me
I want you here beside me.

I feel strange
wanting you around
thinking I need you.

Have I been lonely too long?

Suddenly I miss you
I really just met you
you always make me smile.

Listening to the winds
I know I might rush this
if you miss me, too.

Maybe I should forget
try to take this slow
but I suddenly miss you.

Have I been lonely too long?
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
777 · Mar 2012
Expendable Friend
Cassie Mae Mar 2012
I've got a lot to think about
now that we've spoken
nearly three years have passed
since I called you friend.

I've been filled with doubt
ever since that fight awoken
feelings of long last
that have come to their end.

I don't need you in my life
as harsh as it may sound
our friendship was expendable
but for some reason you seek contact.

All the years caused such strife
words thrown like glass shatter on the ground
you weren't so dependable
memories and laughter I retract.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
768 · Mar 2012
From Across The Room
Cassie Mae Mar 2012
From across the room
I'm falling in love with you.
Your eyes, your smile, your hair, your voice.

From across the room
I noticed your demeanor.
Your hands, your back, your legs.

We've barely talked
We only have one week.
But,

from across the room
I noticed how much I could love
you, all of you.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
761 · Sep 2012
Forgive You (I Can't)
Cassie Mae Sep 2012
I can't forgive you
for getting in the car,
no, for getting behind the wheel
of that car.

I won't forgive you
for drinking the whiskey,
no, for drinking before you drove
the car away.

I can't forgive you
for taking that corner,
no, for driving way to fast
on that road.

I won't forgive
for taking my friend,
no, for taking our friend
out of our lives.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012

RIP Pesh
760 · Jan 2011
blue
Cassie Mae Jan 2011
of all the colors my eyes can see
blue
is the worst.

blue
causes the most pain.
blue
causes my eyes to rain.

blue
leaves my heart in pieces.

blue
brings me the most hurt.

of all the colors the sky could be
its blue.
of all the colors your eyes could be
they're blue.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2006
743 · Dec 2010
You Never Called Back
Cassie Mae Dec 2010
Untrusting.
You never called back,
You never want to see me.

You Never Called Back!

Nameless.
I'll scream to your face,
I'll give you a name.

*******!

You never ******* called back!
You *******.

I thought you would be different, but you're all the same.
Cassie Mae Writings 2010
731 · Oct 2011
Loneliness
Cassie Mae Oct 2011
I'm too young to be stuck in this town
the laundry mat
the liquor store
aren't enough to satisfy my yearning soul.
If you would have stuck around
I wouldn't be here.
Even thousands of miles away
your memory makes this isolation suffocating.
Every heartbeat
breath
and tear
solidifies my loneliness.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
731 · Jul 2011
Heat
Cassie Mae Jul 2011
The last rays of sun
linger like this dream of you
the heat barely lasts.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
725 · May 2012
Slow Down, Settle
Cassie Mae May 2012
My heart won't slow down.
Blood pumps so fast
my face turns red,
hot.

My stomach won't settle.
Butterflies flutter
around in circles,
dizzying.

My heart won't slow down.
I'm feeling nausea
I want it to stop,
ease.

My stomach won't settle.
I feel nervous
I want to be calm,
relaxed.

My heart won't slow down.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
714 · Dec 2010
A Sweater
Cassie Mae Dec 2010
The sweater matched his eyes,
the little girl inside me cries.
The sound of his voice
left the pieces no choice.
They scattered around the room.

There's no more smiles,
no more words to exchange,
but so much left to say.
Cassie Mae Writings 2010
704 · Nov 2010
She's Pretty
Cassie Mae Nov 2010
She's pretty.

I bet she's really nice, too.
Someone you can count on,
someone to help you through.

I've never met her,
and I don't really want to.
I don't want to get to know her.

What do you want me to do?
Fight for what I never had?
Fight for you?

I'm better off watching,
although I don't enjoy the view.
Not at all.

I wanted to love you.
I was ready to fall.
I was ready to give my all to you.

Now here I sit,
pining for something new,
other than this thought,

She's pretty.
Cassie Mae Writings 2010
701 · Dec 2013
I love too intensely
Cassie Mae Dec 2013
I

looked into his eyes
overlooking the pain in mine
vanity
enveloped all other emotion

touching him
overtook my heart with
overwhelming devastation

i
never
thought he wouldn't change his mind
even after my pleas, my tears he
never budged on his
stance to
erase me from his
life and leave me
yearning.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2013
698 · Aug 2012
Monday Afternoon
Cassie Mae Aug 2012
I
though I
saw you board
the plane but it
was just my imagination. I
close my eyes and pretend it
was you and you turn around to
say that you're sorry, that you still love
me but it's not you, you're not her. I
open my eyes to the years and memories fall.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
697 · Jan 2012
I wonder (About you)
Cassie Mae Jan 2012
I wonder
is your chair still in the corner
do you still sit there every Saturday
with your pepsi and bag of chips

I wonder
is your life still fairly solitary
do you still walk after the sun sets
with your hands in your pockets

I wonder
is your favorite band still Snow Patrol
do you still turn up the bass for Postal Service
with your fingers tapping on the desk

I wonder
is your life still playing out the same
do you still dream of all you used to
with or without me by your side
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2012
692 · Oct 2010
Silence
Cassie Mae Oct 2010
The sunlight does not brighten
The warmth sends a chill.
The birds sing noise,
never song.
Darkness is a comfort,
silence company.
Cassie Mae Writings 2010
683 · May 2012
Tonight
Cassie Mae May 2012
Tonight
is one of those nights
when I just need to stare at the ceiling.

When I over analyze a word,
a punctuation,
an emoticon,
in an email.

Tonight
is one of those nights.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
682 · May 2011
Alpha
Cassie Mae May 2011
Brisk air chilled his bone
rising sun called him home.
Frozen earth crunched beneath feet
his chest grew tight accepting defeat.

Lone stranger wanting acceptance
tail between legs recognizing deception.
Howls filled the meadow
snarls directed at the young fellow.

Coward runs from menacing yips
avoiding jaws at heels that nip.
Mist rises from the water
following him as he wanders.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
680 · Nov 2011
Rotten
Cassie Mae Nov 2011
The lights flickered, went out
my world turned upside down.
Memories I've forgotten to forget about
form an ocean in which I drown.

Walls around me collapse
images of you wash over me.
I suffocate with this relapse
of a distant memory.

Words left unspoken
tears spilled into the tide.
Nothing left me more broken
rubbing raw a tender hide.

Never so easily replaced
never to be forgotten.
All the kisses I still taste
but feelings have gone rotten.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2011
676 · Jan 2012
Back In Town (Chagrin)
Cassie Mae Jan 2012
Just when I thought (frown),
'I'll never see you again',
I hear you are back in town.
In memories I finally drown,
can we go back to "then"?
Just when I thought (frown),
'you'll always bring me down'.
I don't know where you've been,
I hear you are back in town.

Young and in love, me the clown,
I always "remember when"
just when I thought (frown).
Nine years ago my world turned upside down,
six years since your blue eyes, your grin.
I hear you are back in town,
"my first love", you wear that crown.
Of all the emotions suppressed, I feel chagrin,
just when I thought (frown),
I hear you are back in town.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2012
674 · Jan 2013
Haven't Met Yet
Cassie Mae Jan 2013
Does he think about the girl he hasn't met yet?

Does he wish she was there when he's upset,
when he's happy,
when he's lonely?

Does he think about what her hair  feels like?

Does he wish he could look into her eyes
tell her his hopes,
his dreams?

Does he think about what her laugh sounds like?

Does he want to see her smile
when he's had a bad day,
when he brings home flowers?

Does he wonder if she is thinking about him?

Does he picture me
the way I picture him
as the man I haven't met yet.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2013
674 · Nov 2011
Whiskey Eyes
Cassie Mae Nov 2011
Your whiskey eyes
drunk with lies
call to my gullible soul.

But to feel your touch
to want it so much
burns a hole in my heart.

When I smell your skin
I feel that I can win
over the love of a boy.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2011
673 · Sep 2012
My Shoes
Cassie Mae Sep 2012
He said he liked my shoes
sitting across from me
after he said we haven't talked in a while.

I want to tell him everything
as I laugh at his ridiculous beard
then I tell him it's the middle of summer.

When we make plans for tomorrow
my heart and my lips smile
then he looks sad, he forgot he has to work tomorrow.

Some other time I say
happy I got to share this moment with him
because we haven't talked in a while.

I don't realize how longs he stays
until he says he better be going
I smile and tell him I'll talk to him tomorrow.

He tells me he'll call
after he reminds me he has to go home soon
I know I may never see him again.

I hope we still talk
maybe we'll even visit one another
for now I'll just look at my shoes.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
672 · Oct 2012
The Love We Had
Cassie Mae Oct 2012
We both lost who we were
when we lost each other
an identity crisis of sorts
you grew a beard
I grew out my hair

When you turned away
we turned on each other
a 'look at me now' game
you went into a depression
I went on a rebound

Now neither of us smile
we took each other's with us
now no one else compares
to the love we had
or the hate we have left
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
671 · Jun 2012
The Mother
Cassie Mae Jun 2012
Wind I can not feel
but hear atop the pines
brushes ripples across the water
at the sight I begin to cry
I am so tried, so weary
that the bird songs are a funeral march
and less a lullaby.

Cold breeze reaches my cheeks
freezing tears within my eyelids
the sudden pop of a tree startles me
but I do not feel fear
I only ache for a touch
something besides the rising light
something warm to cover me
someone to reassure me.

It is silence louder than nature
calling me to close my eyes
try to sleep through the wild
wind and water move
birds and dreams call
as the squirrels chirp I lie down
I give into the Mother.

As the woodpecker drums so does my heart
the wind has calmed if only a little
clouds hide the sun's warmth from my body.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
670 · Oct 2011
In The Dark
Cassie Mae Oct 2011
In the dark

I consider turning on the lamp
beside my bed
so I can write my words on paper
or read someone else's that are bound.

In the dark

I pull the covers under my chin
and close my eyes
pretending that sleep will greet me
or at least tease the edges of my conscience.

In the dark

creativity seems to come to life
but I push it aside
hoping I'll remember my thought come morn
when I won't have to roll over to turn on the light.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
668 · Oct 2010
Sleep
Cassie Mae Oct 2010
In my sleep,
dreams,
we are civil.
We are friends.

We laugh and smile like we used to.
We talk and share secrets.

You are no longer my enemy.
Someone I loathe

hate

In my sleep,
dreams,
we are not lovers again.
We are friends.

And that is all I ask for.
Cassie Mae Writings 2010
663 · Jun 2012
Just A Friend
Cassie Mae Jun 2012
I am at the wall again,
nose in the corner,
just a friend.

Please tell me when
I'll be no foreigner,
I am at the wall again.

How long has it been?
Will this ever be over?
Just a friend.

'Keep it up, your chin'
says the mourner.
I'm at the wall again.

When will it begin?
I'm done being a loner,
just a friend.

Stop the sin,
find my heart's owner.
I'm at the wall again,
just a friend.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
654 · Oct 2013
Fine (Don't Worry)
Cassie Mae Oct 2013
Don't worry
I'll be just fine
sitting here
waiting for your text

Don't worry
I'll be just fine
sitting here
waiting for your excuse

Don't worry
I'll fine
waiting alone
contemplating your words

Don't worry
I'm fine
waiting alone
reading between your lines
© Cassie Mae Writings 2013
645 · Nov 2012
2003
Cassie Mae Nov 2012
Where did these memories come from?
I haven't seen you in years
yet here you invading
every thought
every dream.

Your eyes are just as grey
your smile just as intoxicating
as when I was fifteen
just as naive
just as in love.

Ten years ago you were my greatest muse.
Today I found out you still are.
The way you made me feel
that night in the rain
is still with me today.

If I could look into your eyes today
would you still see a little girl?
Would you accept the woman I've become?
This morning I'll play our song
and 'remember when'.

Remember when
you'd say my name
you'd offer me your jacket.
If we ran into one another today
would you remember when?

Remember when
you left me for her
you wanted to just be my friend?
But if I saw you today
I know I'd still want more.

When I was fifteen
I loved the grey-eyed boy
who loved my best friend
but smiled a smile
meant just for me.
© Cassie Mae Writings 2012
638 · Oct 2010
Alone
Cassie Mae Oct 2010
The silence fills the empty heart
clouded by unsaid words
bruised from being beaten,

The loneliness breaks the crying soul
cold from being untouched
dark from being hidden,




The shattering hope breaks the silence.
Cassie Mae Writings 2010
631 · Mar 2011
hurricane you
Cassie Mae Mar 2011
the cold air
seeped through the denim
the seat of my jeans.
the damp ground
warmer than your eyes
looking into my soul.

looking at you
in that moment
i knew i'd never
forget that feeling.

the rain fell
all around us
forming puddles.
the clouds broke
basking the hurt
in new light.

in one summer storm
in one cool afternoon
in one blink of an eye
in one bitter heartbreak.

the taste of salt
lingering on lips
mixing with acid rain.
blurred vision
clearing up
like the weather.

i sit alone
on the soaked earth
on my empty bed.
i cry surrounded
by memories
by the storm

that was you.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
629 · Jan 2011
Dark Sunrise
Cassie Mae Jan 2011
It was the dark
that held me.
Laying on the grass
collecting dew,
breathing steam.

The moon,
the stars,
black wrapped me up,
and held me.

Then,
there was you.
Then,
there was morning.
A sunrise,
red, orange, yellow.
So bright I shut my eyes,
you shielded yours.

The dark came again.
I felt something,
deep inside,
a tug,
a pang,
a hurt.

Fumbling,
crawling alone
into the dark again.

I can still see you.

There's no more sunrise.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2006
617 · Mar 2012
Inaccessible
Cassie Mae Mar 2012
I
never thought I'd find someone like you
appealing
carefully avoiding this situation
creating a fantasy in my head
evaluating the consequences
sick of myself for the thought
someone else's husband
I** could never do that to a family
believing you're not that kind of man
leave it alone
entertaining the thought
© 2012
607 · Jan 2011
My Worst Nightmare
Cassie Mae Jan 2011
My worst nightmare
is that in the end
you'll love her.
And all my hoping, wishing,
dreaming and believing
will have gotten me nothing,
nothing but a heartache.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2004
599 · Apr 2011
He never called it love
Cassie Mae Apr 2011
He never called it love,
but I held his world in my hand.
How strong he felt we never spoke of.

A pedestal he had me sit, high above,
to look upon his heart, his sacred land.
He never called it love.

It seemed we fit, our hearts, like a glove.
Reciprocation was too much to demand.
How strong he felt we never spoke of.

Persuaded was the heart, gentle shove
to a feeling not willing to expand.
He never called it love.

Up on a pedestal, so high above,
wind blew feelings away like sand.
How strong he felt we never spoke of.

Losing him I never thought of.
Eternity was pictured and
he never called it love.
How strong he felt we never spoke of.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
594 · Jun 2011
Claim me
Cassie Mae Jun 2011
You never wanted to claim me.

I was just a ******* your arm. You never made me feel special.
Maybe I'm the one to blame. I could've committed more to you.

But maybe I never could give more,
because

You never wanted to claim me.

It hurts now that she's something more to you. What more is she than me?
Does she put up with your insults? Do you tear her down, too?

You never wanted to claim me.

I was never your girlfriend. I was someone you were seeing.
I was not someone you saw the future with. I was the girl you ******.

You never wanted to claim me.

You *******.
(c) Cassie Mar Writings 2011
591 · Oct 2011
Naive Again
Cassie Mae Oct 2011
That night you took your smile
     and put it on my heart
Like a brand it burned
     away the hurtful words
     a hole so charred and black

With each new sun the feeling of your hand
     on the small of my back
     clasped around mine
fades a little more until
     the memory no longer
          makes me smile
     the memory only
          makes me cringe

at being so naive
     again
© Cassie Mae Writings 2011
588 · Mar 2012
Lonelier Every Day
Cassie Mae Mar 2012
Lonelier every day
a strange tugging on the heart
this girl can't walk away.

Wishing he would stay
never would they be apart
lonelier every day.

Making your own way
leaving would be smart
this girl can't walk away.

Edges of the heart fray
where did it all start
lonelier every day.

Blue skies fade to grey
seas begin to part
this girl can't walk away.

Waves splash and spray
salt in the wounds smart.
Lonelier every day
this girl can't walk away.
©2012
585 · Jan 2011
The Right Reasons
Cassie Mae Jan 2011
Do I love you for the right reasons,
or is it just your reputation
that has me so infatuated?
If you weren't what you are,
if you were simply you
would your smile still ease my mind?

I've set you on a pedestal
and I'd do anything for you,
to hear your laugh,
to see your smile,
to hear you speak,
to look into your eyes.
And still I wonder,
do I love you for the right reasons?
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2004
585 · Jun 2011
At a wedding
Cassie Mae Jun 2011
The thought of seeing you
at such a joyous event
breaks my heart in two.

Will you be with someone new
celebrating under the same tent?
The thought of seeing you,

I don't know what I'll do,
knowing I'll never be content
breaks my heart in two.

I begin feeling blue
and I suddenly resent
the thought of seeing you.

Since you there have been few
all because the word you never sent
breaks my heart in two.

Someone should tell me to get a clue,
the love we had has came and went.
The thought of seeing you
breaks my heart in two.
(c) Cassie Mae Writings 2011
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