Everyone's love has
faded from my heart
starting with family
and ending with
friends.

Your arms are the
ones that i'll chose
to run in when drunk.
Your chest is the one
that i'll hide in. Your
collar bones is where
i'll bury my face in.

For it's you that will
wash me clean
from sin.

And wash my body
from the alcohol
drenching it from
within in order to
make me sober
once again.

It's you darling.

My mind and heart
will always chose
you even if in a
room with a
hundred or
a billion
standing* ~

Written with Nannette Wakefield and I :

Rose petals in the tub
are waiting for you and
I to jump in. Waiting
desperately to caress
our skin.
The night has come and
door bell never rang. Your
phone turns me to voice
mail. I'm all alone crying
on the bathroom floor.
Minutes after I get a
text that your with
someone else.
I cried as I took a few pills.
In the tub I went with my
night gown. The water
covered my every inch.
as I planned to drown. To
drown my sorrow to drown
my misery and shame.
As I was feeling low and
cheap I wanted to shut my
eyes under the running
water and sleep. So much
pain had filled my heart
and lungs. So much hurt
flowed along the blood in
my veins.
I heard echoes under water
of your name. I heard the
promises you've once told
me while I was in your bed.

How could a human heart
be so cold. How could you
kiss one's innocent lips and
play them like a magic trick ?
How could you fake love just
to please yourself and sin ?
How could you expect me
to cope with all of this ?
As I begin to sink slowly
down into the tepid water
I feel so disappointed to
have put my trust in you.
I feel so betrayed and
isolated and alone.
I start to feel the affects
of the pills I had carelessly
taken and then I start to
reawaken.
Who the hell are you to
make me want to end my
life when its you that chose
to cut me deeply with that
sharp knife.
You will not win.  And as I
see a petal float across
my face my heart seems
to be brought back to life
and race.
I sit up still groggy with
the effects of the pills but
with a new sense of my life
my purpose my will.
So don't come begging
me once more. Because
the girl you once knew
and loved does not live
at this door ~

If I walk into the forest
will I become like those
big old trees ?

If I walk under the violent
rain will I be a wrecking
storm of my own ?

If I walk into a meadow
will I bloom the same
way the daffodils and
tulips do ?

If I walk in a wedding
dress and stick flowers
in my hair will you marry
me and say your vows ?

Will you kiss me and
whisper the words of
"I do" in my mouth* ? ~

Some people cry with
screams. Others cry
with tears of blood
instead of water
and salt.
But I , I cry in colours.
I cry in shades of blue
and green. Purple and
raspberry pink. It
sounds weird.
But I cry in rainbow
tears. For every
colour has a
feeling of it's
own* ~

I'll build an igloo from
your snow. I'll build an
igloo from your winter.
I'll build an igloo so I
can get a chance to
eskimo kiss your little
buttoned shaped
nose in the
freezing
cold* ~

I'll be flexible enough
to fold myself into a
boat to save you when
your drowning. I will
draw you a sun with
my crayons and oil
paint to make sure
the light shines on
your face when your
own lights start to
fade. I will cradle
you behind the
bones of my rib
cage on those
nights where
insomnia
forces
to open
your
eyes* ~

Don't let the beating
waves drag me away.
Don't let the waves part
us apart. Don't let the
ocean's salt erode
our bones.

Hold me like a pirate
does with his treasure.
Hold me like a lover with
pleasure. Hold me the
way lost people do with
rain drops in the sahara
desert.

Keep me close to your
chest.

Let me rest my tired
body against your flesh
and bones. Let me rest
the way clams do when
they wash up on
abandoned
shores.

Tired and exhausted.
Lost and not found. But
yet they try not to
breakdown.

As they keep buried in
the golden sands with
their shells shut on the
pearls that rest upon
their rose pink
tongues* ~