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I looked at the photographs

And felt 

The weight of all of the people
I could have 

Become.
You said I was the best,
no really,
you said that
As you drunkenly horse pet my face
then I said something
nowhere near as funny as I thought it was
but you laughed anyway
laughed as I told you I wanted to see your face on the other side of that glass pane
oh but you'll come visit me right?
of course I will say I'll visit you
but between you and me
plane tickets are expensive and I've always been a man of leisure
No lazy is not the right word
it's definitely leisure
you were scared
God knows why
as scared as I am when the time comes when I see you in person
a moving statue to the things I hold close
you said I was the best,
believe it or not,
as you drunkenly horse pet my face
and I said
only when it comes to you
Be careful sharing your heart with me.
I fall in love with those who open up.
Like a levee breaking
my love with flood in to your heart.

It will be beautiful and it will be fierce
and the currents will be of a Biblical magnitude.
So please be careful;
you're far too pretty to hurt.
Ups, and downs.
I see us through liquid smiles,
you saw us with regretful frowns;
We stand on opposite ends of the isle.
You are high when I am low,
we are but deadweight to hold onto for control.

What matters is past and present:
I still keep the photos of us,
while your heart's still not shaken.
I still see us in my dreams,
and as for you, you are not keen.
Oh, how I pity my poor pessimist
Do you not mind what I scribe?
Does curiosity never approach you
When I know you can't sleep at night

If you do, I hope you discover
That I write simply- you & I.
With my being beyond the horizon
In these words you must rely

A carpenters daughter,
(It's true) I was never taught, how to fix the lonely
But I assure you dear
You won't be in the slightest disappointed

My entire life is an intricate patchwork
Of multiple afflictions
Through hotel rooms & glamour
Abuse & drug addiction

"Through bathrooms & ballrooms
On dumpsters & heirlooms"
Baby, we'll be fine
I know in my minds eye
We'll be fine


As for the sea
I feel the vibrato,
A ripple when you're lonely
But the tides will greet you, excited at the pier
To bring you back home to me  
For darling,
I long only to bury my tear-stained face
In the man too far to say he's home
I do not choose the life I live but it's the only one I can call my own.

*One day
I promise
You will wake in bliss
Between ruffled sheets
And my petite, contented figure
The pessimist will embody nothing
But the purest form of happiness
 Dec 2013 Carla Michelle
-
Loving you drove me to the edge
And now I seem to have relapsed
Devotion put me to the test
It caused a major collapse

You broke me again
Just like I knew you would
All of this pain because
You were hard not to love
© Natali Veronica 2013.

I hate myself so much right now.
You're all of which I
love
and    
hate.        
All in which I seek to
destroy
and            
create.                
The sky above my subdued brow

  the              Sunbeams in the nape of your neck
fingers tracing lines
on the inside of my thighs
up towards my stomach.      
the curvature of my naked breast
my ear succumbing to your hot breath

My heart rate fastens
"Look into my eyes".                                    
Hand on my jaw, he purrs
*"You're mine."
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