Whenever I am with you
My worries will fly away
Whenever you're in view
It brightens up my day
Any time we are together
I feel like I am able to fly
Everyday I feel lighter
Until we say goodbye
I am relaxed as can be
I dream to touch the sky
When you're by my side
I feel like I will never die

It seems to be the simple things
Things that we remember most
All the little unnoticeable dings
As you drive from coast to coast
Going to get frozen yogurt together
It's simple and will be in my memory
Every passing day is getting better
When I see you smile in front of me
I try to create a smile on your face
I do the simplest things to succeed
You can try hard to fly over this place
But simple things is all that you need

It is the start of yet another day
You're awake an energized again
There is so much you have to say
But you forget and you feel insane
You awake with a smile on your face
Seeing the sun when opening the blinds
Hearing all of the sounds of your place
And smelling the fresh coffee grinds
Have a fantastic morning beautiful
I will text you whenever I am awake
I hope your morning is not quite dull
But it starts with a bang and a shake

Death sends you an invitation
You accept half of the whole
It sweeps across the nation
Accomplishing it's only goal
A world full of dark mystery
Something new every night
Darkness is all you can see
Giving any young one a fright
Sleep is a quick taste of death
Replenishing your necessities
It releases creativity underneath
Creating dreams with small keys
Sleep is death where we awake
It is where I mind is most used
It gives back more than we take
And leaves us all less confused
Sleep is something that I fear
I fear I won't wake the next day
The time for us all can be near
It will end in some kind of way
Sleep is death eating our lives
Cutting the time more everyday
Slicing slowly with sharp knives
Until our "sleep" has gone away

I will guide you until you succeed
I will give all necessary knowledge
I will give you all the help you need
To help flourish in life after college
I will teach you all the needed skills
I will assist you when you need help
I will turn all your maybes into wills
To help you believe more in yourself
It is my duty to brighten your future
It a must to push you through it all
It is my job to put you through torture
While I am friendly as you walk the hall

If you ever take a tumble
I will always pull you out
I will search through rubble
If you don't give a shout
When you fall, I'll be there
I will heal any of your injuries
I will heal any scrape or tear
When you fall, I'll have the keys
I will always be there to catch you  
Like no one else was ever able to
With one last thing that I like to call
I am here to catch you when you fall

Everyone tends to have a fall
Every once in a while nowadays
Everyone hits that invisible wall
Every once in a while it stays
I will be here to catch you always
No matter what anyone else says
I will be here to hold you up tall
No matter what anyone else saw

I am here to catch you when you fall
When there is no match left at all
I tend to fire away any harm nearby
It comes to the wire to when I cry
I am here everyday for a loved one
I am here in anyway to bring the sun
I am here for those close to my heart
Only those that chose to not depart
I am here to give happiness to you
I am here to live for everything new
I am not here for those that backstab
Leaving a tear and with nothing to grab
I am only here for those that appreciate
I am only near to those that can wait

I honestly have nothing to say
I am happier than I used to be
Every single day is a new day
I now live flying high and free
I feel like i have moved onward
From the difficulties in my past
I'm focused in moving forward
I know that pain will never last
If you keep your head up high
It's easier to stand tall and fly

First I will say you look wonderful
Despite being out in the humidity
Your spirit remains peppy and full
Even over a temperature of ninety
Your smile brightens those around
Your hair flows freely in the breeze
You try to help those that surround
Telling them to stop and to freeze
You like to be surrounded by peace
You're still with some that are a pain
Even those like me that tend to tease
Now you silly chipmunk orangutang
I must ask you one thing before I end
Would you, Madelyn, be my girlfriend?

It all started as a simple road trip to see the one I used to love. She's sick and doesn't have much longer. I drive there alone and almost get myself killed along the way, but I arrive safely. I get there, welcomed by her family. We eat and she's not there. Her dad gets a call that they all have to leave for New York that night, but she's still not around. They all decide to leave me in charge of her safety. I go to see her and tell her that she can go to New York and I'll take her there. "I would rather die here. Please leave me alone" she whispers to me. I push aside her request and take her to the airport. Along the way, we stop at the light I look at her, move closer in, and there's where it ended.
What a dream...

We used to once have it all
With happiness and hope
It struck an imaginary wall
But that hung on the rope
I used to say that I love you
Now it's an I love you not
You left me stuck in glue
Leaving me behind to rot
I do not love you anymore
But I still will always care
Life has been a downpour
But our life will never be fair

It seems to happen at night
My happiness suddenly dies
My old self is back in my sight
Back to the distrust and lies
I look back to many years ago
Remembering how I felt then
Those years took a heavy blow
Making me retreat to defend
I look back to the happy days
When I had someone to hold
To guide me through the haze
Warming me in the harsh cold
It is nights like this where I cry
When I regret something I said
I will always continue to try to fly
Until my heart is cold and dead

I am thinking about what to do
Should I move on now or do it later
Thinking like this was never new
I just don't know if I can date her
She is a wonderful young woman
I am thinking about her everyday
Her great smile with my dull grin
It doesn't go together in any way
But opposites attract one another
I like her but she may not like me
It's as unpredictable as weather
Whether I'll be stuck or set free
With each and every passing day
I push another opportunity away

I can clear up all this endless agony
With one slick decision I can't make
I think of anyway to become happy
And I'll do whatever it will even take
I'm pretty sure I found where to start
She's energetic yet has a calm soul
I wonder if she can fix my dark heart
Making life energetic instead of dull
I fear that I could hurt someone else
I went through it and I am still stuck
I can't seem to get out of this mess
Even whenever I muster some luck
I wish I was able to make the choice
To say a thing to a certain someone
It is me that has a controlling voice
To end more chaos before it's begun

I know these annoy you a bit but I hope that you understand. I know that you know that I'm a mess and I know that you know that I know nothing that's going on in your life. You do know, however, that I know that you know that I miss you and everything but I know that you know that I know that you're happy right now it seems and I don't think you quite know it yet but I know myself that I am very grateful that you're happy even though I know that you know that I know that I wish it could be me but I know that we both know that there is nothing left that we can do. I do not know if you know what I'm saying but I know you may know what I'm saying now because I know you're intelligent and my hopes with this is that it helps you know the truth more and helps us both know our past so I can know that you're doing okay. All because I miss you and I hope you're doing okay. I'll try not to do any more of these because you know that I know that these confuse you a tad but I just decided to do something that I used to do a while ago. Anyway, goodnight, have a good day, and maybe we can talk again. If not, I hope you're doing okay. Yeah, I'm done know. Sorry for annoying you with this

I don't even know why I'm giving advice
I haven't been able to move on my own
I have nothing left to give as a sacrifice
But I'll share my thoughts with my tone
First you have to forget about your past
This is something I can't even complete
I like to take my time and not go too fast
In the end, I seem to always face defeat
The next step seems to be out of sight
You must cope with any known difficulty
Because at any time in the day or night
You can fall apart in your own captivity
I would say then you must find someone
A special person you can trust with it all
A person able to cheer you up with a pun
Every time you're on the verge of your fall
The last step in my mind is quite obvious
You need someone to fill in your other part
No one that seems devious or mischievous
Someone that can heal your injured heart

I live through every lonely day
Always thinking about my past
I think about what else to say
Until those words are my last
No longer involved in your life
But you always appear in mine
Consistent struggles and strife
Kept my reality senses in a line
I tend to always brew a memory
Like the day we became a thing
When we met, when you left me
Seems to always rip away a wing
All I want to do is fly far far away
Leave all these memories behind
They constantly appear everyday
Making happiness harder to find

I know that there is nothing left
It's all gone and left in the past
I'm not expecting any response
But this message will be my last
I just hope you are always okay
I hope you're life is always great
I'm happy to see you've move on
I'm not able to at that same rate
I'm still stuck in the past, oh well
I'm glad you went to prom and all
I'm truly happy that you're satisfied
But I wish us both didn't rapidly fall
If you wish to stop this is the place
I want to keep this short and clean
You're forever my only Polish buddy
Both of us made one amazing team
If you are to continue, just good luck
All I'm going to say is absolutely true
I am not the person you remembered
I am not a hundred percent over you
I do fear getting in another relationship
I fear getting way too deep once more
Just to fall even harder again and again
Just to get up and fight my internal war
I think I found someone else to be with
But I'm not sure anymore with my mind
It's been playing tricks on me for a while
Distracting me and making me fall behind
I still remember some dates clear as day
Someone can question me and I'll know
I can't shake these details out of my head
I wonder what it'll be like if you didn't go
I've been thinking about you a whole lot
Wondering what you're doing everyday
That's nothing I should even think about
I have my own life to worry about anyway
If you wish to talk, I will always be here
If you don't, that's fine, you can be free
Free of my annoyance and complaining
Now is the time that you can forget me
I really had to say that for some reason
I'm sorry if this will hurt you in any way
I just want you to be happy and you are
And maybe we can talk again some day

We all have an uncontrolled amount
To be able to make everything okay
Making every single moment count
To that last breath on your last day
For some of us it is in the unknown
Time is and will never be unlimited
At times you'll feel afraid and alone
You can't fear your fears or be timid
You near the end with every moment
Not wasting a moment on nonsense
You can't wonder where it all went
Because it will leave you more tense
We all have a endless ticking clock
It shall never stop or slightly bend
It will continue to move and to rock
Until your heart had reached the end

You can't just assume it's alright
You must be positive at all times
It's better to know than assume
Everything can easily go wrong
I think about it every single night
I try to think inside the faint lines
I sit every night in my dark room
Wondering where time has gone
I still worry every night about you
I know that you don't do the same
You get rid of everything about me
Just forgetting the fact that I'm here
I miss you a whole lot and that's true
You probably forgot my simple name
You're living happily, alone and free
While I'm here alone with no one near

The truth about me is plain and simple
I'm just a shattered mess in need of help
My heart has been stolen from my body
Locked away and never returned to me
I always have a smile on my hidden face
I hide my true emotions from the world
No one knows how I truly feel in any way
I'm broken in search for a fantastic day
I don't know when this day will show up
Not sure if it will ever appear to my eyes
My life is full of lies that feeds my pain
Losing control, nearly making me insane
The truth is I do it all to myself unwillingly
I feed my body with pain to strengthen it
I'm not physically strong by any means
But I am mentally strong it sure seems
I have no control on my life right now
I'm on a bull losing total control of itself
It's unclear what I'll be able to achieve
To be successful this agony must leave
Maybe the music isn't helping life much
Drug and alcohol references drag me in
I still don't drink or do any kind of drug
I'm the type that just tears away the rug
I don't take my anger out on any others
I take it all out on myself and myself only
I generally don't accept help from anyone
In fear of dragging them in as well alone
I don't like who I am today and that's clear
I want to be the old me once more in life
Maybe this time I can not ***** up again
And then I'll be freed from this hated pain

For some strange reason
I feel that I must write this
I am not sure what to say
I guess I'll just start anyway
I'm not sure how I feel now
I'm having ups and downs
Not liking who I've become
I wish this was all finally done
I put myself in pain everyday
I never try resisting any hate
I use this hate and fear to rise
Rise above all as a surprise
I miss the person I used to be
Happy and loving of the world
Now I wish to just leave it all
Letting myself continue to fall
Unsure where to go with my life
Going with where the flow goes
I'm not sure where to even start
I could just follow my dark heart
But that's been wrong all along
It pointed me to failure in my life
I thought it could help me through
But it just led me straight to you
I thought you were the only one
The only woman important to me
I know now that I was just wrong
I know it was never you all along
You just destroyed what remained
I now have nothing in my heart
I can't blame everything on you
It was my fault, I hope you knew
I was the reason it all went to hell
It was and is my fault it all fell apart
I am the reason I'm who I am today
It was my fault with this price to pay

I remember it all clear as day
Every simple date we shared
You had to just push it all away
Like you no longer even cared
You left my life a long time ago
It was before when you will think
I just kept on going with the flow
As it crept nearing to the brink
You've been now for a long while
I still have all dates in my memory
Leaving me down and in denial
From the start until you left me
You're already gone in my life
But you still live in me somehow
You pushed me through strife
But that's far behind us all now
I wonder why I still think about you
Or why I still worry about you being
You seem to no longer have meaning
Other than that one girl I once knew

They depend on so much to work out
They need faith and trust in each other
It needs believing in anything just about
Help is needed from father and mother
Just to make sure everything is straight
Criticism will always occur in such thing
Certain criticism can actually be great
Because more faith is white it will bring
You can try your hardest just to succeed
I don't think they work out at the very end
There is other necessities that you do need
I don't have anything there to recommend
I learned from experience they tend to fail
Here are a few tips if you choose the risk
If your partner communicates less just bail
Meaning something can no longer be fixed
Remain in contact as much as possible
Try to see each other with some device
Keep your schedule clear and flexible
To talk to the other or you'll pay the price
I don't find them successful but that's me
You may find them amazing and perfect
Mine left me alone but always feeling free
In the end it left me in a disastrous wreck

I often tend to wonder why
Why I even think about you
As I look for hope in the sky
I can never find anything new
I could be overly sympathetic
Or just easily be able to forgive
I am simply just really pathetic
I must push to continue to live
I have compassion in my head
Forgiveness is in my cold heart
Without it I'd probably be dead
Never again with a fresh start
Trying to forget your presence
That will forever be incomplete
My mind seems to feel dense
Clearly full of undesirable defeat
Moving on from you is my key
I can't live life remembering you
Although you've really helped me
I must move on to someone new
It's going to be an agonizing ride
Trying to push you out far away
These memories I must now hide
Maybe to see again another day
A necessity finding someone new
Not as easy as it is in my dreams
Not clear when I can forget you
I need someone seal loose seams
I'm not sure who this will soon be
I do not even know where to start
Finding someone to make me happy
Will heal my lonely and cold heart

It must mean you're never tough
Making you feel inferior to us all
Even if your life is becoming rough
You can't even cry when you fall
Tears can't flood from your eyes
Tears can't escape from your head
Even if family or a close friend dies
You can't cry tears of dense lead
All I wish to do is sit down and cry
I want to forget what others will say
I wish that no one close will ever die
But that won't ever happen anyway
I would sacrifice myself for anyone
No one will waste their tears on me
Once I'm gone my tears will be one
My soul and dignity will be set free

Let the search now commence
Although it started so long ago
If I had enough common sense
I would be confident and know
I'm looking for someone to hold
It's simple and easy as can be
I take all of this advice I am told
Using it just to let myself fly free
I feel pressure holding me down
Keeping me from flying far away
I wish to search out if this town
But that shall begin another day
I'm searching for a heart healer
Not a pretty face to to peer into
Everyday I will be able to hug her
Being the best guy she ever knew
I wish for her soul and heart near
I'm searching for happiness in me
I wish to wash away all inner fear
Of being blinded and unable to see
Unable to see the world as a whole
Blocking away my heart and my soul
This search keeps on moving onward
The only direction to head is forward
Not remembering failures in the past
Finding myself true happiness at last

Sometimes I want to curl up in a ball
Just to cry and let the tears flow away
Sometimes I wish to give you a call
Just to realize I can't do it anyway
Sometimes I hope I can just fly home
Just to be told that I am already here
Sometimes I feel so cold and alone
Just to realize I am with no one near
Sometimes I wish to be happy again
Just to realize I can but I just don't try
Sometimes I want to get rid of this pain
Just to see that my tears have gone dry
Sometimes I wish to leave this place
Just to realize I'm stuck for a while
Sometimes I wish I can let my heart race
Just to realize my heart is now in denial

I feel like life is a giant ride
A roller-coaster of mystery
No place to run or to hide
Past is gone now history
Once in line, no returning
You now are strapped in
Your stomach churning
Shoulders in a tight pin
Just like your emotions
Changing automatically
No remedy or a potion
To cure this lone bully
Sad and happy all day
Not knowing the change
Knowing in a distinct way
It's now in a different range
Can't control the machine
But you can control you
In a world of bright green
I only see a brownish hue
I want to get off this ride
I want to run as far possible
Before it gets close to my side
Leave behind all chaos and rubble

I have been unobservant as of late
Many opportunities have flown by
I feel like I currently have a full plate
I sometimes wonder why I even try
I feel like breaking down in a mess
I wish I had come through at times
Now that it's too late I must confess
I want to cry as if I bathed in limes
I wanted to see you here once more
I feel like this could've been the last
Another opportunity now out the door
I'm not imagining a blast from the past
This is only one that had come and gone
Out of the many that I can't even count
More will happen before the break of dawn
If I had to count this impossible amount
I would need every hand in this town
I have missed opportunities everyday
With missing all these, I feel like a clown
I must take control is every possible way

I don't know what to do anymore
I can't make a simple decision easy
I'm clueless deep down in my core
My view in this world is quite hazy
I don't know which direction is right
I don't know which direction is wrong
I can never find the ever glowing light
I hear nothing but the fading of a song
This song pointing me somewhere near
Someone near where in supposed to be
I don't follow because of what I now fear
I fear there is no more happiness in me
I don't want to go through any more pain
My heart is currently torn without repair
It's not a simple fix as if it were a strain
Nothing can fix it unless love is there
But love to me is nowhere to be found
I have to yet decide what sign to follow
I choose which way by a distinct sound
Hoping it can fix my heart which is hollow

This poem is more of a rant
If you don't read, that's fine
I just feel like I need to vent
Share the recent life of mine
I don't know where to begin
I'll start at about a week ago
We were in Hawaii, a big win
Love there continued to grow
Yet I also felt down and alone
There's a lot she didn't know
All the times I called her phone
I'm was starting to fall for her
I didn't even see this outcome
I thought I had found my cure
To take me out of my own glum
I can't decide to just go for it all
Or sit back and watch it unfold
I'm always the first to give a call
She called first which was bold
I don't know what to do there
But I have something else to do
I wonder if she will even care
But I could see someone I knew
I haven't seen her in over a year
We had been apart for some time
We were close and our hearts near
But now it's hard to even combine
I kind of want to pay a simple visit
But I'm not if that's her preference
I don't want to strike memory's pit
Especially after our new indifference
She seems to have moved on better
I'm stuck in the happiness of the past
My mind is still stuck in the gutter
I'm looking for just a simple blast
To shake me loose so I can decide
If I want to move on or just to hide
I don't know if I should make a move
Or continue to move with the groove
Im stuck between two tough choices
I'm trying to follow what my heart says
I can only hear many different voices
Each telling me about different ways
Telling me all about any possible end
Telling where my life could possible go
Telling me which decisions to defend
Right now, I'm clueless and I don't know
I don't know which direction to go head
But I'm done for now, after that's all said

I have quite a lot to overcome
Many decisions must be made
Quick and quiet like a faint hum
Few with some prices to be paid
Deciding if I should give you a visit
Deciding if I should ask someone out
Each could carry a consequential hit
In could also benefit without a doubt
I know both can course some harm
One can be a last time to see someone
The other could easily set off an alarm
I with that both could be easily done
I'm not sure what to do in this mayhem
But time can be running short with each
I know I but be quick with both of them
Both ******* the life out of me like a leech
I must decide what's best for us everyone
But if I don't think soon, it'll all be gone

These islands are magnificent
So much to see and a lot to do
Between people, money is lent
As we always see something new
Full of romance and pure beauty
Sights some may see in photos
Up an extinct volcano feeling free
What's new to see, no one knows
Now my time here is far from boring
I'm enduring pain and also confusion
Busy with free and organized touring
To me it all just feels like an illusion
I think I found someone that I like
She happens to be pretty and sweet
We talked on the Diamond Head hike
And got through it together in the heat
I don't know what to do in this moment
It's not the first I've have to quickly decide
While climbing the volcano that's dormant
I realized that I am no longer able to hide
I'm limping around with a strained calf
It happened while swimming in the ocean
It felt like my calf had been ripped in half
Now it's in pain like a while ago it had been
I'm in this romantic area full of compassion
But I'm alone with my own unique fashion

It's simple, I really need someone right now
I need not two nor three nor ten, just one
Not an animal like a dog, cat, hamster or cow
But just as simple as a human being and done
A someone or somebody, it's the same thing
They both are singular for only one reason
It's a someONE, a man to always be a wing
Or a female, it never matters any season
I need someone to always be able to hold
I need someone to talk to all the time
I need someone to help me remain bold
I need someone to have our powers combine
I know that this person can be hard to find
Maybe not as hard as you think, I can try
But with all past somebodies, I got declined
I wonder why, I am loyal, kind and don't lie
I need someone to rant to about every topic
I need someone to clean up this mess I am
I need someone to care for me when I'm sick
I need someone to patch up my leaking dam
These are only needs, not wants or demands
I'm missing an important aspect of my life
I need someone to talk to and to hold hands
I need someone to help me through this strife
I want to have a somebody always with me
So I can stand up with confidence once again
So I can rise to the top and again be free
Free from the grip of agony and constant pain
This is no small matter as I continue onward
I want to turn around and head the right way
Because I don't know what that's now toward
But I'm hoping happiness returns another day

In the past we were the same
Both compassionate and kind
Full of joy and always energized
Ready for what life threw at us
We were together in young love
Nothing will be breaking us apart
We felt invincible to our open world
We could do whatever we wanted
Today is now the opposite storyline
We are now separate in our own ways
I'm not sure about your characteristics
But I'm not as kind nor compassionate
I am a fragile human being in this world
Every word spoke, all actions, can hurt me
You now seem happy with someone else
And I'm alone in my own cruel universe
In the future who knows the outcome
The future is something of the unknown
You can't base the future from past facts
But you can create speculations from them
You can predict you life in another ten years
But you can't be positive that'll be the result
I do know however that I'll still be living life
While you're gone from here, in the afterlife

It's been quite a lot as of late
Of living in complete darkness
Here in my world full of hate
With a lack of true greatness
It seems like a hated place
But here it is easy to hide
Myself from any other face
I can't see that far ahead
Nor too far back behind me
The past is gone and dead
The future is still can't see
Full of unanswered questions
I live in my lonely dark dystopia
Peace is what I never mention
Because fear haunts every día
I don't know what happens next
My past memories are now gone
My life is confusing and complex
Never seeing another break of dawn

Does it even matter anymore?
Us together is now out the door
All communication has stopped
This mess can not be mopped
You've moved on and I have not
You just left me out here to rot
You seem to really not even care
As I slowly tear out my own hair
I'm in pain and regret at this time
I'm in despair and your just fine
Why do I always seem to worry?
With moving on, you're in a hurry
I'm sinking in this endless quicksand
I hope to reach out and find a hand
There is no help nearby to be found
As I'm suffocated under the ground
I'm now defeated by my own heart
As I'm slowly getting ripped apart
Now nothing seems to matter to you
You've even forgotten friends here too
You're focused on life away from here
But I still feel the presence of you near
But it doesn't matter anymore, right?
It's time to end it all and end this fight
I'm saying goodbye now when possible
Maybe after all this pain, I'll be invincible

I'm not the same anymore
I'm different in every way
The old me is out the door
Not coming back another day
I'm not the person I used to be
I'm always changing each week
I was full of joy and always free
Now I'm alone and feel like a freak
I do not like who I am at this time
I hate seeing myself in my mirror
Feels like I committed a federal crime
As I think who I was and about her
My mind is swirling round and round
It won't stand still and I easily get lost
I will search for my old self until it's found
I don't mind a sacrifice or an unwanted cost
I wish to not be in this state full of fear
But it won't change now that the end is near

It happened a year ago in this date
I saw your face for the very last time
Although that day wasn't that great
It keeps my shaky life somewhat in line
Wasn't thinking about it much back then
I thought I'd see you in the near future
Now it's a matter of where and when
Your face blooms again like in nature
It feels like such a very long time ago
Much longer than this one lonely year
When I'll see you again I don't know
I do know an opportunity is now near
I wish to see you in my life once again
Yet I will worry about seeing your face
It'll bring back memories and the pain
That are frozen and locked in place  
My feeling have changed a lot since
Us no longer close is one of my fears
Thoughts about you makes me wince
As I try to hide my emotions and tears
I know since then we've drifted apart
You've moved on and are now different
I'm the same, healing my broken heart
I'm wondering where my old friend went

There is a haunting whisper
Every so often in my dreams
Each night getting crisper
All the same by all means
An old friend falling in my arms
A relative lying on the ground
The sounds of sirens and alarms
Showing signs of death are found
Sounds of gunfire in the distance
Screaming children cry for parents
Seeing they're creating a resistance
They hide behind the last defenses
Peace flows through the old city
No signs of life in the end remain
The town ends rough and gritty
The new ghost town is full if pain

I'll leave it plain and simple
I'm currently living in the past
Each memory creating a wrinkle
But these times were a blast
I had enjoyed my life back then
I had a person close to my heart
We talked again and yet again
I thought I found my missing part
That's what set in undesirable pain
I fell deep into a hole of nothingness
I'm standing alone out in the rain
Waiting for the return if greatness
But that shall never come to me
I'm living in the past and losing hope
My life is now dark and terribly nasty
This nastiness can't cleaned with soap
I'm living with a questionable future
I want to relive what is in my past
I want to leave this horrendous torture
And erase all thoughts of you at last

Going on nightly walks together
Hand in hand, happy as can be
Extremely fair and clear weather
Walking with heads high and free
Going together to the school Prom
Having the best time in our lifetime
Feeling like that is where we belong
Enjoying time when the moon shines
Laughing at every single pointless joke
Talk about al ideas coming to our heads
Going on dates together until I'm broke
Chatting all night while we lie in our beds
This should be us at this very moment
But you left my life fast than you came
And now my life is in constant torment
As my life always has a constant rain
This should be us living the best we can
You're now with you guy from your dreams
I always though I was, but you weren't a fan
Apparently this guy is better by all means
You're happy now; I'm in constant despair
You're constantly smiling; I am now crying
I always thought we were the perfect pair
But that idea is leaving as you're dying

We used to be extremely close
But that's now gone I suppose
We no longer speak anymore
You just walked out my door
You try to keep your life a secret
Hiding something important I bet
You're hiding something from me
But that's fine, you're alone and free
You're probably hiding a lot that's untold
Your secrets will quickly open and unfold
But it's your life to control, not mine
I'm trying to put us extremely far behind
But nothing seems to be working now
Everything you're hiding now raises my brow
I don't know what to expect next from you
I do know it's something that's always new
You're hiding stuff you don't want me to know
I'm alright with that because I'm letting go

It disappears and then it shall return
Each time it is leaving a new harsh burn
Leaving me a brand new lesson to learn
As the pages of life continue to turn
It's been 126 days since the disappear
Happiness doesn't seem to come back
Happiness came to me this past year
A year ago on this day, I left the black
It seemed to stick around for a long while
Until it left 126 days ago, not being the same
It has left me lonely, depressed and in denial
And I do not have anything still to blame
Because I can't control my own destiny
But I can control how free I shall always be
I should always be happy with what I have
It's friends and family that make you laugh
Being with those are close is good enough
Especially when times turn and become rough
I don't know when happiness shall return
One thing from this experience I will learn
Is that you can't depend on one human being
If you depend on only one, you end bleeding
Because your mind and heart will quickly break
And you'll eventually have way to much to take
You will think there is nothing left in your life
But I learned you need to fight through strife
Because you only grow stronger every day
With time, life will be easier in every way
Just try to remain in your one happy place
Take your time walking through life's race

A wise man in our past once said
That change is what makes life
We'll all eventually end up dead
And live together in our afterlife
Change is needed to keep living
Change gives life an endless flow
Things go south, in you're giving
Keep your head up, don't sink below
Live life the way it's intended to be
Not by having it perfect the whole way
You need rises and falls to remain free
In the perfect life, everyday is a new day

As the time continues to stretch
I find myself fading further away
Creating a new me, an evil wretch
Never returning back another day
I have nothing to peer forward at
Nothing but memories left behind
Future wiped away at the door mat
Not able to look back and rewind
Slowly fading away from the source
I want to fight against no resistance
But I'm letting life finish it's course
Cause what's killing me is this distance
I'm fading away from all my close peers
They don't seem to notice at the moment
But soon after many of these gloomy years
They'll know I lived through pain and torment

It seems like life now is great
Your life consumed by dance
You seem to have a full plate
Seconds will not have a chance
You've posted a few photos
And there's a smile on your face
If it's true or not, nobody knows
It's just sitting perfectly in place
I don't want to intervene anymore
It's your life and I intend to stay out
Ignore all I say and continue to soar
I'm always nearby, just give me a shout
You're happy now it sure seems to be
And if to remain that way, forget about me
Because your living life as a women so free
Flying high above where others cannot see

Every single time that I can manage
I try forget my many thoughts about you
I'm always left in a deep disadvantage
Resulting in me feeling down and blue
I have my good days and then my bad
I have the great days and then horrible
Remembering the memories I once had
Leaving me alone, afraid and vulnerable
I see you smiling doing what you love
I lay here, remember how I made you feel
Everything was fit for the perfect size glove
But now I need time for my heart to heal
My world is not the same without you here
I miss having my sweet friend here so near
I miss seeing you happy with me my dear
But it's over and the end is near, that I fear