You pass me on the street and our eyes briefly meet.
You hold the door open for me as I enter behind you.
I say thanks, but you have no idea that my mind is blank.
In the elevator you crack a joke, I flash a smile,
you have no idea that my heart is in denial.
You ask me how my day was and I say fine.
You have no idea that my brain and I are arguing as to whether or not I should cross the line.
My happiness is gone as I walk in this world.
The thoughts in my head have me wishing I was laying in a cold dark hole.
Once you lose your soul there is no turning back.
Everything you once dreamt of no longer has an impact.
You don't want to love nor do you want to have fun.
Your days are so long the problems in your mind make you question if you should carry on.
You smile so that's what people see on your face,
they think that you are happy but deep down inside you feel like a worthless disgrace.
Each day the performance you put on for people is Emmy Award winning,
But you question yourself and wonder if your way of acting is just a way for you to hold off your own internal sinnings.
When you wake up from a night's sleep you wonder to yourself if today is the day your heart will be back to its old self or will it still be skipping every other beat.
You wonder if things that once made you happy to be alive will make a comeback.
You wonder if the little things in life that made you who you are will have you once again dreaming to the stars.
You wonder if you will feel less empty hearted.
You wonder to yourself who holds the match to start that fire.
You're tired of running and losing your breath.
You want to hold tight to something that will help you once again enjoy the journey into lives amazing treks.
You want to feel that every day can be better than the last.
You want to turn your lost soul feeling into a thing of your past...

never tell me you love me
my lips are chapped with the thought of
destroying you
or maybe
you destroying me
depending on the weather

never tell me you love me
i’ll be so full of the fear of
deserting you
that
i won’t shut my eyes at night
until i’ve counted my blessings    

never tell me you love me
i don’t need any more reasons to live

I wear  my insensitivity along with my silence well.
Under those materials No one can tell
That I am messed up inside.
Or can they?

Because once we are snagged by the hook of their words
We sometimes want to release the pain.
We want to let the words speak for us while we take a back seat

Because once our hearts are chained to their power
we sometimes need to let the screams fill the pages in ALL CAPS.
Sometimes we need to bury our pain with lead and shavings.

Because sometimes the only thing that is stable is the rhymes and stanzas
The structure of 5-7-5 gives us control
The freestyles might not be enough
but they at least let us express how we feel with out being turned down.

This is why we write Heart Broken Love Poems.

I want to cry
I want to scream
I want to tell you mostly
I hate that I'm so afraid of everything
I hate that you’re the one thing I want the most but can't have
I hate that you let me go before I got even got to say goodbye
I wish that you would come back to me
I wish I were strong enough to say no to you
I wish I could believe my own lies I use to cover up the pain you left
I need to move on says my head
I need to hold on says my heart
I need to decide says my mind
I envy the way this hasn’t hurt you at all
I envy her
I envy the fact you don’t understand what this feels like at all
I want to hurt you
I want to be with you
I want this nightmare to be over
I wish I could make things they were before you
I wish I could change time
I wish I could change you
I wish I could have hurt you before you hurt me
I wish I would have given you the letter when I wanted I need you out of my thoughts
I need you out of my heart
I need to start doing things for me
I hate that you used me
I hate that I gave you something I can never have back
I hate that I wasted it with you
I'm tired of hoping aimlessly for you
I'm tired of wanting something I can't have
I'm tired of hurting myself for things that aren’t my fault
I'm sorry I wasn't good enough
I'm sorry I defended you when everyone else was right
I'm sorry I couldn’t make you happy
Funny though how you never once said sorry for hurting me, for breaking me, for not loving me.

Thinking about you,
Makes my day,
Every moment,
In every way,
Your smile melts my heart,
Like no other,
Especially,
When we stare at each other,
Your face gives me butterflies,
Whenever I look at you,
It makes me want to blurt out,
I Love You,
But what turns me on,
Is not just you face and your smile,
It's your personality,
And the times when we talk awhile,
Being with you makes me happy,
All the time,
That I wished you were forever mine,
But you have someone else
Which hurts my heart,
Every time I think about it,
It tears me apart,
I understand,
If you love another and not me,
Because the truth is,
I just want you to be happy,
But what pains me the most,
Is when we talk to each other,
And all you can talk about,
Is her,
If she makes you smile,
If she makes you glad,
I don't want to get in the way,
Because I'm not like that,
But to tell you the truth,
When she goes,
I just want to tell you,
I love you more then you'll
Ever know