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betterdays May 2014
3:39 in the a.m.
                   bats call,
cat yowls,
          dogs bark,
                                 partner,
                     snorts,
            snores,
                 ...  . farts......
grandma shuffles to toilet.... .... flushes.
             baby whimpers......
..... or was that me,
         a glass of warm milk to.......................helpmesleep
a dribble.... of scotch to help        .....me sleep
                         a mix of both to help me cope
              no just breath
partner,
             snorts
                      snores
                                 farts
...............must make......
Drs appt for him.
    
  sleep
that knits the
                  ravelled sleeve?
not tonight
           for me
                I do believe.

4.19 in the a.m.
                         To thelazyboy
                 I go to doze.....
perchance ....
                   40winks more
80winks before
          dayshift specialbeautifulcrazy               ....        .....   dayshift begins..  
      DOUBLE SHOT LATTE           .                   PLEASE.               .
...already it is a long day...
700 · Sep 2017
random heatwave thoughts
betterdays Sep 2017
going through spring heatwave here
tempretures that are hot for summer
the last three days.

sweltering
guzzling
perspiring

phhht so hot
the lizards are seeking shade
the devon rex has declared
the bath tub as his and hisses
if we try go move him


sweltering
guzzling
sweating

found my boy
sleeping with the fishes
really he had climb into the fish pond
and was pretending to be asleep
while the fishes swam around him

perspiring
guzzling
sweltering


sweltering perspiring guzzling

sent the surfer dude out for some beer
he was taking a long time
rang him....hes said i live her now
in the beer fridge...at dan murphies
come join me....bring pizza and the boy
we will be happy
my so was pefectly safe in the pond my husband was watching him....and he is a nipper snd knows water safety protocols
698 · May 2014
almost...
betterdays May 2014
i kiss, the nape of your neck,
while you still sleep
and inhale you.
spearmint, sandlewood
and citrus combined
with clean sweat.
you stir and roll over,
you are healthy
and in your prime.
more than my heart stirs, more than your heart, responds.
your lips, meet my skin
for the first time,
allover again.
i am drawn...
like moth to flame .
i am before you,
barely, contained,
but your teasing,
tendril,torching, tongue
scatters me to
richochet,
without
thought or sense.
my lips seek
the curve of your
collar bone and neck
as if to feast
upon your soul.
my hand behind
your head holding,
kneeding, that spot
on the top tip of spine
that makes you growl.
our desires grow deep,
our arousal complete,
we move,
to connect our hips
in early morning,
grinding, greeting,
i quiver,
as you,
rampant,
touch my lips...
....and our son
begins to wail and sob.

we break,
with regret.... unrequieted.
i go to see to him,
you, to a cold shower.
our day begins,
with love and frustration.
but then,
there is always, the art of...
delayed gratification.....
698 · Jul 2014
tweedledum, tilt
betterdays Jul 2014
down amongst
the rubble,
i babble,
whilst
i fiddle
with the
thoughts,
from
the middle
of the riddle,
that is
my brain.
but,
this time
the only answer
i gain
is
tilt!! .... tilt!!
try again
later
when more
sane??
looks like
it's
gonna be
one
of
those days
697 · Mar 2014
Want ad.
betterdays Mar 2014
WANTED:
one poet!
garret trained,
impractical in many ways,
scatterbrained, dark, mysterious.
and lovelorn.
must be at the very least lovesick.
not adverse to occasional starving and bouts of woe.
even able to adapt to living
in a continual cycle of manic depressive flux.
able to overcome writer's block...
and worse!....word drought
able to converse in both, straight and rhymed verse.
desirable; an understanding of
freeflow and rap
must have ability to write,
day as night and night as
day
must work for minimal pay,
read: mostly zero $$.
just occasional compliments.
should be able to empathise.
and in a position to consider (as a carreer pathway)
attempted suicide.
applications by way of
verse
can be sent to the reader
via the internet eather
and will be read of course
but be warned the reader
is fickle and may not deign
to reply...

hallmark cardwriters need not
apply
just a little fun
lol
696 · May 2014
a hollow man
betterdays May 2014
john donne, was wrong ...

you know,
there are times...
when a man, is an island,
set alone far out to sea.

when,
he is bereft.
just a void, of sadness,
a gape, of hulking misery,
a chasm, of blankness,
in diminished and weary desolation.

with,
nothingness,
barren nakedness,
abject defeated melancholy,
as mountain range and peaks.

with,
indifference,
listless malaise,  
the emptiness of depression, fatigue and lethargy,
as his meagre crops to eat.

with,
despondency,
distress, grief, affliction, abject and ineffable, sadness
as, the rivers that run through.

with,
tribulation,
torment,
desperate lamentations,
now, covering,  
the fields with bitterness
and bereavement,
where once, the wildflowers,
used to grow.

now,
he is an island, alone.

deprived and dispossessed.
wanting and widowed.

and
with beaches, ravaged, bankrupt and heartsore
the reefs, encircle,
tho, fragmented, incomplete they are short, sharp teethed
coral.

waiting with,
patience absent,
anger rampant.. that

make,
the currents turbulent ,

those,
miserable, mournful, waters,

those,
sad, sorrowing, suffering, waves

that,
break, upon his grief-laden
shores,

tide, after, tide, after, tide.

he stands,
among the grieving.

unreachable.

an island.
a hollow man.
alone.
for Lazlo with love.
696 · Apr 2014
a cacophony of leftovers
betterdays Apr 2014
the cacophony of whispers speaks again ....giberish spouts from my bloated brain ....my head is .....
rotating.. tating around the room whispering at a decibalac boom . . .  up is down and down. .  . is no left turn... drumbeats skid off my dishpan brain... i see a mark.... liqour green.... an unholy stain.... parrot like my mother squawks.... that won't soak out ... you've ruined your best brain ...
my my mind is ... listing to the right....and feels.... decidedly....  strained like ....custard bumpy..  and lumpy...... the whispers....... screams chunk about... and i ****..... awake.....sweatslicked,
drymouthed....... and ......jit...jitt....jittery...jitter...

i sit a second ...and then reach for reality .....a toddler who's had a bad dream.
...no more...leftover pad thai
and  double choc brownies
followed by an afternoon nap......a decidedly bad idea.... lol
695 · Apr 2014
siberia....last night
betterdays Apr 2014
when we fight,
it is not with
violence and
closed fists.

it is, with walls of  frigid words
and corridors of cold silence,
it is with bricked up
bittered rooms
and frozen tundra spaces.

when we fight,
it is not catastrophic,
or volcanic.
its a slow and grinding glacier.

it is, kisses of frost,
and polar bear hugs.
it is, with pointed,
icicle words,
and smiles,
of snowman coal.

when we fight,
it is not coming together,
in hot blooded fury.
it is surviving,
the boreal glares
and minus zero words.

its is surving,
the arctic
ice wind swirl,
of being,  
alone together  

when we fight,
it is,
waiting for,
the ice to crack,
the snow to melt,
and the sun to shine.

i consider it a good thing,
that we don't fight often
694 · Jan 2016
bright things...
betterdays Jan 2016
bright things,
glisten and shimmer
in the corner of my eye


little fairy wings
flit and flutter
in the outer circle
of my sunny day sky

my oak and acorn
plant seeds in the sunshine

no hope for sadness
no room for forlorn

today is bright
daffodils and roses
happy faces, happy poses

small sloppy kisses
and large heartfelt ones too

the last days of summer
shining, shining through...

dappled sun ...
green grass too,

we all lay down,
soak the heat
from the ground

happy to, look for fairies
and pixies, and gnomes,
lady bugs, inch worms, skinks
and grasshoppers too.....

dragonflies hover
and race the wind

butterflys, flutter
art on the wing

and in the tree
the kookaburras  chuckle
the magpies warble
wrens chatter

these are memories
although, destined to be lost
these are memories that matter
these small things and lazy days
are the backbone of our lives
holding us upright in times of strife
giving us grace to cope, with the darkside of life

these bright things, lead us home.....
692 · Apr 2014
virtualality
betterdays Apr 2014
virtual ink etched on vitual paper.. synapse rebounds taken down, on tablet... applet releasing the
imagin- ed pressure in my incohezant brain. little bytes of... making it right sent into.. the webby ether clouds....... zip drive compressed, pixelated, ram driven,memory boosted, data mined, spam shot,
drive by.... now encrypted ... password denied... .....virtual ink lost to the .....link ... .......... 404 error ...... page not found... virtual paper, now, lost forever.

destined to be in
www. miscellaneous file/ never to see the light of day. not org. nowheres
just lost another one...
******....lol
692 · Jun 2014
do not disturb.
betterdays Jun 2014
the salt tangs and swirls
in the mist
giving the world outside
my door
an ocean lisp
all the tree's now indistinct
and ghostly
all the world now mostly
secrets and whispers, soft this morn
the cloud have come to visit
and the sun....
he is up there somewhere
the little blucat has made
his decision....hibernation
is the mode of coping...
the boys of the same intonation...
who am i to disturb the flow
....back to bed with book i go,
691 · Sep 2017
into the breach...
betterdays Sep 2017
into the breach i go
no heavy footed
but on tippity toe

into the dark night i sail
in a boat shaped like a whale

into the forest  i run
with a smile and bread crumbs

the highest mountian
i will climb, only to
roll pell meel down the other side

i will walk on clouds, swim each
and every sea...i will be as magnificent
as only i can be...

i will dive with polar bears
and fly with albatross
will run with  giraffe
and stand with rhinoceros

and when i am done with this day's play
home to you i will come,
with clothes, *****, ripped and frayed...
and you will sigh and grump and say...

"little man, what did you get up to, today?"
my little man's anthem...
690 · May 2014
no time for games
betterdays May 2014
******!!!
carkeys...
where have you gone??
this time...

i know you think,
this is a wonderful way
to pass the time.
but i am a busy woman.

and when i put you
down,
someplace,
i expect you,
to stay there.....

not grow legs,
scurry away....and hide

now....
i am going to,
close my eyes,
count to ten
and then, when,
i open them,
you just better be
sitting right there
in front of me!!!!


and that
goes for you too...
ya silly sunglasses.
just a bit of foolishness
690 · Mar 2014
streaming#372
betterdays Mar 2014
bright ....butterfly.......talent
.....flicking tongues
of ......allitrative illustratation
unsure..... of present improv
packaging.....puckers lips to pout and preen....
........grunge moth in hoodie
comes to sauce the play....
tounge twister fandango
...... paperlace lizards ...dreaming...days streamin by....
all the mouths....... of ritual making.......
fourth wall breaking. ..
.....accummulate the method
scribe..... to the write
........formulate the figure...
linguate the lyrical....
left..... to the pintered flighted sighs.....
.....shake the speare this night
with finger drumming colour rhythms..... reveal the reasoned might ........of the fledgling dramaturg.....
foot stomping . ...posse blighted ....... brainstorms
.  .burn limelight bright burn...
throw your fleeting..... searing glow....on these little dramatic vacations from lifes realities.....
freezeframe ......moments.....
......of luducrosity..... and. . humming allocentricity ......
....egos pay homage to floor
door and wall...
drink..... the life ....the love ........the fear
pinprick and bucket dance it ......come one ..... come all.
learn the art of the comic pratfall ...... here at the home
of drama 171 improv
. ....by the pants of your seat
and other mellowed..... dramatic.......completes
thoughts on a residential drama/ theatre studies school i taught.
689 · Mar 2015
thought and process
betterdays Mar 2015
conjugating,
thought and action,
is harder than it looks this morning,
think,
get out of bed.
act,
hit snooze button.
think,
drink coffee.
act,
miss mouth, wear coffee.
think,
what to do next?
act,
blank look.
think,
rewind start again.
act,
go back to bed.

conjunct made!!!
687 · Mar 2017
;
betterdays Mar 2017
;
;*


Her story will continue

Rest in peace

others will take up your sword
and battle call

the war continues
Amy Bleuel acknowedged founder
of the "semi colon project"
which alerts people to those battling
mental illnes by the battler wearing a
semicilon  tattoo
tattoos  are also worn in remembrance
passed away recently
She is one of many small
whispering voices that have changed the world
Please remember her and her closest
to the heavens today
RIP
686 · Aug 2014
hearthside
betterdays Aug 2014
it is three a.m. here
and the unseasonable cold
has etched itself onto the knobby bones of my spine
and eats voraciously at the
callous of bone and metal
that now suffices as my
lower left leg...

in answer, i sit in front of the
newly stoked fire, as close as i can without becoming fuel
and await the painkillers sweet surcease.

i drink russian caravan tea
and as always,
it draws my thoughts to you.

the time spent with cup in hand and eyes full of laughter.
the way you rolled each teabag up into a neat little
parcel...

and those times of ceremony, birthdays and
big announcements.

when the tealeaf was allowed to swirl joyously and swim in the squat blue teapot,
releasing the aroma of
a gypsy campfire...
all rowdy, with celebration
and then served with the
orange and ginger cake,
(so **** good)of which,
i never did get the recipe.

always, the tea, served
in fine bone china
the tea, visible through
the white translucent pottery..
and we still,  playing at being, civilised and grown up...

the tears slide,
gently,down my cheeks
to fall and be comsumed
by the warm hearth...
as the gypsy songs fade

and i do not know,
whether, it is from the pain or sad and grasping grief,
that they come...
                          but they come.
betterdays Nov 2014
S Creeker

Just have to say
read your poems
and it was a wild ride.
from the hunter
onwards,
you laid down your words
in a pattern,
i read as truth...

at the moment,
your book here is small,
but i hope you stay....
and create a sheaf
of poetry so freakin tall.

you take me...
where i have never been,
or likely to go
and with style
and flair.....
i see it all.....
i be a ******, standing, gaping in the corner there.

so please,
take these words,
as  a compliment due...
and encouragement,
to let me again
ride pillion
on your mind's wild side.
as part of the dear blank challenge....
founs this new to here writer
great panache and style
give them a look-see
684 · Aug 2016
Mr Lot's Lament
betterdays Aug 2016
pick my bones
weary broken
heartsore
up
from where life has
scattered them on the floor

dust off
the grime
and salt rime
from tears shed.
regather thoughts
from whence they fled

straighten up
the bowed back

plant the semblance
of a smile upon my face

take my place,
near the end of the rat race

and put my best foot forward
even as the other foot
drags through broken glass
and the detrius of a life
lived to hard...to fast

don't look back....
just move on.....and on

somewhere....there will be
                                 some sort of comfort

till then grind your bones
on the grist of life....

taste the salt on the wind
and remember when......
683 · Apr 2015
a visit from the king
betterdays Apr 2015
it's all I have,
not much, to you, but all
and with my heart torn asunder
I watch my life, my labour,
resting here, for you to plunder...

ravage the fields,
torch the meadows
**** the bees
and watch the clover
wither...

count not the cost
of your rapacious greed,
see only your hearts selfish need
to be the sum the total, the all.

not knowing, in your victory
you become...the pall,
that settles in the room
and stops the conversation,
like smog and a locust infestation.

this is my life, my family
and we do, what we do
to remain free of heartache
and negativity.

we need not your benediction,
or blessing of our grace.
so...you look to yours and
shut your face....


**********
napowrimo2015
promp­t : write a parody or satirical
poem...utalizing a famous poem you know


"It's all I have to bring today –
This, and my heart beside –
This, and my heart, and all the fields –
And all the meadows wide –
Be sure you count – should I forget
Some one the sum could tell –
This, and my heart, and all the Bees
Which in the Clover dwell"

**Emily Dickenson.
started out as something different,
but ended up as apoem about my frustration with my brother's need
to compete and put me down...
when he visits....
he needs to be at all times
the king of the castle... middle child syndrome.....
(and yes it would be easier not to invite him....but my mother dotes on him.... family dynamics **** sometimes.)
so there it is.... in all it's pettiness.
683 · Oct 2014
l.f.p.
betterdays Oct 2014
i found this little poem
sitting unattended,
alone,
on a bench at
the bus station.

when i said hello...
the relief and elation,
on this little poem's face,
made me feel protective
of this, orphan creation.

so i took this little poem
home...
no longer lost,
it thrived
from three lines to five
and before
we wished it
happy cinquain
it had doubled in size,
again.

full, rounded verse,
in cursive copperplate.
as it entered puberty
its moods swung,
between...
love, anger, hate
and then struggled gamely through
depression angst and fear..
all jots and tittles,
with future, unclear.

but eventually it matured
as we all do....
into a thoughtful expression
of beauty and love,
a strong and independant
statement of grace.

and then it was time,
to say goodbye....
the little found poem,
needed to leave
and find it's place,
in the wider world.
needed to find
and impress a girl.

it said it needed,
to make a splash...
grab some cash...
it promised not
to become, just a jingle...

and to write when
he could....

but til then.... anon...
i miss him,
now he has gone
once he was a scrappy little
thing.... stuttering along
now he has gone,
all epic...
and wears allsorts of punctuation bling!!!
sometimes ....
he drops me a line
but all it ever says is
love u mum♡♥♡
i'm doing fine!!!
betterdays Sep 2014
we as poets,
are like birds....
in the sky.
soaring against,
the backdrop of
nature's grandeur

while aloft, we espy,
beauty and sorrow
and all the stuff....
that living life makes,
and falls forgotten,
in-between the cracks,
of just.... being.

from which,
we as poets,
glean .....
words and phrases,
that cause us to,
ponder, wonder
and cogitate.

those whispers of love.
sighing, breaths and sorrows
thoughts of futures blest,
of now, i am impressed
and yester's hollow,
and yet to be put to rest.

and bring them home,
with loving care,
to nidificate....
to interweave what we
see, hear and feel... & know
into the nesting chamber
for our wordlove....
                       for our poem
the one...
not quite yet ready to....
                                 take flight.
683 · Jun 2014
cheep
betterdays Jun 2014
gotta have lunchtime nap!
forty winks.
i could afford,maybe more,

please dear lord;
i implore


keep the knocking hordes from my door.
switch the phone to silent
the mobile off,
comuputer quieted,
laptop too.

please heavenly father: make mute the zoo.

remove the marking
from the couch,
hurry now,
just push... it on the floor.
my nap time,
is dwindling away.

but,
without some, sombulance,
my semblance of calm acceptance will,
be blown away so,

dear god on high:
as i lay me down to sleep, can you converse,
with the sparrow
outside the window,
about stopping,
it's cheery,
              *
fucken cheep
*thank you lord.... and please don't let me snore*
681 · Apr 2016
Ingrained2
betterdays Apr 2016
table grain
worn to
soft smooth flannel
under many hands
bleached, bleached
to opaque memories
of tree

stories held within
each cell
birds at nest
leaves in flight
each year
slow deaths
new lifes

now repository
of tableware
keeper of daily cares
slab of timber
dressed and washed
bleached, bleached
still somewhere within
the memories stir
of breeze and rain
the touch of feather and fur

tea ring stained,
and portwine blurred
babies teeth marks
gnawed into wood...

taken from place to place
granfa's table, time for grace
grace and memory
clear the table time for tea

do I remember these things clearly
or is this just an ingrained fantasy
681 · Sep 2014
sweet fascinations
betterdays Sep 2014
my
fascination
is
today
with
the
not
quite
seen
those
flickerings
in
the
periphery
visual
line
the
ye­t
to
be
thought
half
formed
nebulous
inklings
mind
wrinklings
the
words
balancing
precariously
on
the
tip
of
the
to­ngue
the
song
of
joy
or
sorrow
yet
unsung
the
dance
step
stagnati­ng
in
the
toe-tap
the
poem
waiting
to
be
found
in
the
shadow
of
t­he
corner
of
almost
and
rhyme
these
are
the
things
that
fascinate­
that
whittle
and
while
away
at
my
precious
time
680 · Mar 2014
scorned not yet scarred
betterdays Mar 2014
open the book
let your tears
fall on the pages
on handwritten
love

watch the saltedwater
make pools and ponds of
your heartfelt protestations

wait to see
the paper warp
and wrinkle
in cruel parody
of lifes reality

turn the page
now smeared
and blighted
knowing nothing
remains pristine

love has alighted
on a dark horse
no longer true
to the the troth
pledged when
love was true

the ******* just
walked out on you
leaving just when
forever was in sight
on the horizon
leaving you with just this

a lethal pen.. and a womens
need for.... vengance
for and about a friend whose partner
just left her
679 · Jan 2018
my little white knight
betterdays Jan 2018
the small meaness of it
shocked me,  really in
this day and age
you would think
we had worked our way
past this sort of petty thinking

but no, apperently there are still
social neanderthals out there
who, when seeing some one different
have to poke fun at them,

before i could voice my outrage
at their actions my boy came
to the defense of his friend
standing up and calmly saying
difference is good, if we were all bullies
like you...then the world would be horrible
then taking the hand of his friend
he turned his back on the instigators
and walked back over to me

never have i been prouder
my son and his mate who is  on the autism spectrum, were playing when confronted by ignorance, his response astounded me....so calm and brave..
679 · Feb 2015
bard dogged
betterdays Feb 2015
got to love
a man with
a sense of humour;
our friend  mac
has come to visit,
with his
scottish terrier pup
named mcduff.
only so he can,
take him for walks
and cry out
"lead on mcduff, lead on"
true story.. corny, but true
677 · Jul 2015
coldsnap
betterdays Jul 2015
outside the wind howls
and gnaws at the corners
of the old wooden house

inside the fire roars
and eats the trees memories
in hot flickering bites

we sit at the kitchen  table
with mugs of steaming goodness
and chatter about the news

unthinking of those
who cower in windswept corners
cold to the bone,
remembering a forgotten warmth
of heart, soul and body....

the wind  howls,
my heart aches
at my own government's  
stupidity....

and the cold reamain cold
and the homeless numbers grow....
and compassion becomes a useless word
like the mewling of a kitten
was horrified to read that the city of Perth (Australia)had installed a sprinkler system in the courtyard of an art gallery .... to deter the homeless from sleeping there....
betterdays Jul 2014
i am tangled up ........and caught out in the..... doodles on my writing pad ....lines of ink ....turning circles up..... on itself..... great loops of nothing...... but sloppy eternity..... rings ...and . ....sideways.... sloping eights and ......sloveny obese zeros i am... hung up .. on time ..at present ..small moments... . .....forty-five years...of.... fore-evers ..... and miniscule secondia.... just hung.. up... ....doodling.. wasting ...time
timing space....crazy paving
.....the forcourt.. of my
oodling.... idling brain.
675 · Apr 2014
item.#. 01486619.
betterdays Apr 2014
today i am but,
a rude mechanical thing
a wind up toy.
plodding along with whining gears

today i am but,
a fool's pawn to swing
a mere pendulum being,
arcing between
the sun and moon

today every thing is done
purely on muscle memory.....
....my thoughts...
.... are engaged elsewhere.
the only difficulty encountered.....
....they neglected to inform me
of their intended  whereabouts

so now this is me,
a discombobulated, thingamajig
bought from Ikea, sans the allenkey, put together inexpertly, clunk-clunking
along, not right..a little bit wrong....clank- clunking on
by.
675 · Nov 2017
evening shower
betterdays Nov 2017
the day ends with a shower
rain falls through a golden sunset
and the rainbow stretches out past the waves
another *** of gold given to the deep blue water
i breathe in the smell of rain as a gather damp washing
to hang under the verandah's eaves
the cat watches from the window
meowing for his dinner
the rain feels cool on my face
675 · May 2015
sublime
betterdays May 2015
the little blu cat
sits in a shaft
of sunlight

fastidiously
washing behind
little blu ears
with paws
encased
in crushed velvet

the image,
is ....sublime
betterdays Jan 2015
the jellied bioluminescense,
drifts and swhirls in an ****
of neon ecstasy...

out beyond the breakers

we sit on the beach
and watch,
with voyueristic fascination

as the sea makes whoopee!!
but oh it was beautiful....
673 · Jun 2014
it is what it is...
betterdays Jun 2014
there is, lying within my soul,
an elusive dissatisfaction...
like the loss...of a red balloon,
floating up to the air...
and you, almost have a hold the string....
but then,  the balloon is not there.
it is gone.

it is like that aftertaste,
of the best meal....lobster, butter, brandy, garlic.
still tasty, on memories tongue.
but the restaurant, closed
and the recipe...long gone

it is that moment, remembered, of just we two,
of pristine blue water salty, manta rays dancing ballet and fish and coral and crab
sheer under water bliss...
but now, standing in cold winter rain....knowing,
you'll not soon know that connection  again....

it is knowing, that while
i can see your face
and hear you speak....
these are just, soundbytes, from the history we keep.

it is grief, and it comes
and it goes.....
it is sadness, wearing
the reaper's clothes.....
it is knowing, you are gone
and no-more.....

it is my late night tears,
quietly, falling to wood floor.
670 · Mar 2014
Interviews at Bedlam Hall
betterdays Mar 2014
ROOM. 148
(Benjamin.)

This morning,
as I showered.
I saw the face of
Genghis Khan
appear,
just fleetingly
in the suds,
as the swirled at the drainpipe
he brandished,  a grinning leer
and then was gone.

This morning,
in my coffee,
institution brewed.
There he was Van Gogh,
Vincent,  from when,
he still had an ear.
Today, blue paint,
smudged his nose.

In the carpet, after
the cleaning lady had
come.
Amy Whitehouse
visited n'said,
"Rehab might have been
useful afterall."

They the faces, concerned,
and attached to bodies,
encumbered by white cloth.
Tell me, this is non-classic
pariedolia, a symptom of a larger syndrome.

And  if I wanted, to improve
my state of well being,  
that I should not
have any further....hmm
conversations...huhuh,
with the people.

I see in,
the woodgrain of the  
dining  table,
or the man in the
light's moonlike  cover,
or the chap in the door,
of the communal bathroom's
stall wall.

Yet I won't listen,
I don't trust them.

And besides, my buddy Freud
who pops up with the toast.
Told me today,  
"They don't know,
what they are,
talking about.
Not at all, not at all."
In any case,
my muses pariedoliac,
are far better
conversationalists.

With them, I have a ball!!!


ROOM 212
(Gwendolin.)

Today, I am good!

But some days.

My mind, is a battlefield
and I the maniac,
with the finger.
Hovering over the big red button.
So wanting to:
slam my hand down and end it, all.

On other days,
I barely have the energy within,
to lift my head from the
grey, black sludge,
I am drowning in.
On those days,
breathing is sisyphean task and the world is a *******
ball.
Balanced precariously,
on a weary and depressed Atlean hand,
as he drops defeated to the sand.

Then, there are the days I am so up and bright and bubbly
I am appalled and I exhuast myself with my happiness.


But truly, the worst days are,
when,
I am all this and more.
Those are the days,
that my mind becomes,
a feudal state.
Where I am foresaken
to the rage of mutiple realities, engaged in battles for prime position.
I struggle valiantly,
to hold, the bastion of sanity,  painstakenly created and found, in the smallest corner,
of my brainspace,
But they rage and rant
and roil and take,
my precious sanity,
and soil it,
in their mindless games.

And at the end,
of those days.
I am left to pick up
what is left of me
All the tattered pieces
and start all over again.

But the medication helps
smooth me out a lot, it does.

ROOM 179
(Bob.)

"Hello, do you have
a word for me?"

"Blatherskite, oh
you beautiful thing"

"Wordscore 21"

We can begin now,
I know I am not normal.
That I think differently to most.
My mind, is a mendicant,
beggarly thing.
Sitting in library corners.
It's arms held up in supplication, palms outstretched
begging alms, of dictation.
And slathering like a dog,
at a feasting table
snatching at syllables
and sentences.

I sit for hours engrossed
in thesuari
and would gleefully
stab your back multiple times
if you  carried a rare dictionare.

I am a wordaholic
words they are my
sorrowing addiction.

My scrabble tiles,
runic of my affliction.

When stressed the
smoothness
of a spelling bee
is my only solace.

I want to be very clear
I do not see my
addiction
as a affliction
adversely
affecting,
autonomy
but, the
surgeons
of the
psyche
differ,
in their
extrapolation,
of my
lexigraghical
pre occupation
apropos,
vis a vi,
my life
and functionary
state, therewith.
So my tiles and I,
stationarilary
codepend
in this spatial
reality,
until my
mind can find
a state
of equilibrium.

And to be brutally honest
with you.
I don't think that will be
soon,sooner, soonest.
poem/s created as an exercise from
three words supplied by poet friend.
the words were
mendicant, feudal &pariedolia;
no other instructions were given.
.....this is a work of fiction.
668 · Jun 2014
mantra
betterdays Jun 2014
there is,
in my opinion,
nothing like,
the determination,
of  four and half kilos
of grey feline.
that wants...
to be fed at 5:37am.

the pushing
and bumfping,
the disproportinate roar,
of the basso profundo purr, in your right ear.

if still not convinced,
or just,
downright lazy
a whack with a southpaw
to the back of the head.
your attention will restore.
no you're still resisting
the charm.

then be aware,
of the flying leap & twist; landing on the midriff.

but, from years of dilligent training,
i have deduced,
the cold, wet nose, trailing across my exposed flesh,
is to best be avoided.

simply, by stumbling up,
from your rest....
and succumbing
to the mantra,
the cat knows best.....
fill the bowl,
be done with,
the furry pest.....

and hope you
can snooze for a while,
before.... you have to get up
and feed the rest....
668 · Jul 2014
curio in middle c
betterdays Jul 2014
a calyx in chaos.
a crack in chalky crown, crimson, cratered, clowns
cry crystal shards....
clothe me in crimpolene
in shades of clinical ivory
and cream.

come hither they cry
and carp, cavil,caterwaul.

come hither, come,
come, come.
cypher the cyan, from the cyanide
castigate, the casting,
of the conversational.
be cognisant, within the
cogs of the  clock...

click-ticking..tick-clicking

in chorus, chant of canticle.
be the calm,
within the clemency.
and the core,
of the courageous.
concede not,
contemplate, with conscioncious, clear
the concepts of conotation

above all be
incomparable, capricious, canny and considerate
a conglomerate of cause, corpus and crux.....
both curious and a curiosity.
cause...
creation, cherishes
a clever n' curious, curiosity.
writing exercise...alliterative
freeflow...letter c
667 · Jun 2014
Lint.
betterdays Jun 2014
Here I am,
picking tissue lint,
off my favourite linen pant's ( I hate it when you leave a tissue in the wash.)
thinking small thoughts.

My mind,
dawdling along,
as my hands pluck tissue.
A bit like a magpie hunting worms.
It is hypnotising, in it's own way.

My dip, into the shallow end, of realities swimming pool. Now, I know,
there are those out there,
who are drowning,
in the deep end
and those who,
swim laps endlesslly.
And I will tell you,
honestly.
I know well, both those states of mind.

Bu, for here and this moment.
Dipping in a toe, is just fine.
667 · May 2014
delusions of granduer
betterdays May 2014
even in the midst of sadness
the universe gives
you cause to laugh

sitting in the park
watching a tiny Chihuahua running round frantically
marking the whole world
as his....

got to admit he has big dog
dreams......
665 · Mar 2015
begetting
betterdays Mar 2015
love, begets love
in bundles big or small
love, begets love

joy, begets joy
bright dropping jewels
joy, begets joy

hope begets hope
ephemeral, shining light
hope, begets hope.

life, begets life
all encompassing life.
life, begets life

and so the cycle goes....
betterdays Jun 2014
unfettered thoughts
               scattered like spilt
       coin on slippery cobbles brass, silver,and gold
                     all lie gleaming
on the steaming
               .... . ....stone.

                        small thoughts
and large
spent along the way
                 these here,now,
are the dross
        and dreck of the day.

          one by one,
                   regained and
  pocketed,
         so gently,
                    put away,
                              at rest,
                                      at last,      
                weary mind,
              and tired bone.
            all thoughts now,
                    neatly
                 tucked up
           inside of my head.
663 · Apr 2014
communion
betterdays Apr 2014
i stand for a while,
ankle deep,
in the soft sinking sand,
at the tip of the tides reach.
the final inches of
the curlique wavelets
wash over my feet
and take with them,
on their return to
the brotherhood of
salt and water,
my footholds.
the water, refreshingly
cold on this hot muggy
summer afternoon.
i wade further in to
the calmer wash area,
after the waves have broken,
to about mid thigh
before
i dive shallowly through
the caesious waters
of the green room's
breaking waves,
and swim out,
to beyond the rise
and swell of surf.
to float in the
embryonic embrace
of the sea
my heart sings
with primal joy
at the saltinate communion.
after time slows, sufficiently,
i return to the beach.
and stand in
the pressing warmth,
with rivulets
of my mermaid self
dripping onto the sand.
662 · Apr 2017
the scallop shell
betterdays Apr 2017
walking on the beach
yesterday we picked
up a scallop shell

white to ivory on the outside
multi shades of purple within
truly a beautiful thing

once home and hearth to the scallop
or plate to the serving of he
after his demise

sometimes decorative window
on the sandcastles side
sometimes shovel to dig themoat
to turn back the tide

not often but at a pinch
a rental for a naked crab
til a better fit is found

platter for a sea bird's feast

marker for a lost wicket
in game of rounds
or beach cricket

necklace on silver thread
part of small creature roof
as the tide surges over head

if we had found two
could claim it at a bra
for small breasted
mermaid too.

once part of life, vibrant and small
eventually to, become particles
of sand, tossed about in wave
and sea.

the scallop shell,
what beauty
delicate but strong,
calcium at its finest

tideline jewel,
and a great skimming tool

we left the scallop shell
with the waves, to continue
it's journey, we gave it more days
Napo wrimo day 6: write about an object in differing ways and from different viewpoints. for more info:
http://www.napowrimo.net/
662 · Aug 2014
doublespeak
betterdays Aug 2014
my mother handed out
love in admonishments
about clean shoes and brushed teeth
to try our best and not to bleat about a life hard and oft incomplete....it is only now after years of growing
in understand it is not because she was hard, uncaring  but that she was as fragile as spun glass
so much already taken stolen by this world...her mother while in her teens
first love taken by vietnam
war machine, first child, daughter a few days old...and then three live children, later husband taken by gambling and a woman she considered a friend.
those simple words became
hard to say....to admit love
was to have it ripped away.
so she taught herself, this terse morse of words imbued with love..take a jumper... have you got your books all double entendre
just in care not risque
with love bespoke....
as children we learnt to find the deeper meaning
to parse conversations
for love...sifted by despair...

we learnt well, the art of doublespeak....
freeflow...
662 · May 2014
three
betterdays May 2014
three coins, in his pocket
to a boy of four,
a fortune.
in reality,
two dollars fifty.

the same into a piggy bank.
on alternate weeks...

but he likes,
the three coins,
in his pocket,
the
jingling,
jangling
sound.
661 · Oct 2014
damaged
betterdays Oct 2014
i am not whole
or complete.
tho as previously
noted,
i am serene
with that fact.
at least for the present
factor of time.

i am damaged.
in body and mind,
but then i rely on
the indisputable truth.
we are all in a state
of decline...

my life,
more full,
than empty.

i now walk with
a slight limp.

my mind,
more order,
than chaos.

my black dog
lies asleep.

i have learnt,
to be happy,
with the blessings,
that have blown my way.

and accept that perfection,
is a waste of precious time.

i am not whole
or complete.....
but mostly....
i am better than fine.
661 · Nov 2016
dragon lights
betterdays Nov 2016
the moon
clothed in pearl grey clouds
sits high upon the sky
as the tides sings an ode
to it's beauty


the air still,
then zephyrous
dances with dust and motes
in the street lamps reflection

dampness sizzles and steams
on old tar roads, puddles erupt
as cars swing  on through
dragon lights on high beam
veering off into the night

we sit, drinks in hand
as small things pitter
and patter about
and listen to the deepening
of the warm summer night
659 · Apr 2014
how to build a wall
betterdays Apr 2014
when i want
to build a wall.
i take the stone,
formed by,
anger or hurt
from my gullet.

wash it, so it's
dark facets shine.
then place it,
in the footings,
of my insecurity.
find another and repeat
til they form a line.

using as my mortar,
pain, embarassment
and indignation in equal parts.
mixed with tears and bile.

and then, i begin again
buttering bricks and
offsetting, them.
i want, no need,
my wall to be strong.

tho i never build,
my walls too high
three or four courses,
never, no more.
i want to be able to,
step over them
and be free

i have seen those
and watch them still,
thoese who, built a high, formidable wall,
a fortress, it does become,
with them, still locked, imprisoned inside.

so i learnt to build,
walls strong, but squat
so i can,
when ready,
emerge.
righteous and graceful.

but this is my folly,
the flaw, in my scheme.
my walls, they run
*****, nilly, everywhere.
and over them i trip
**** over beam..

so now...
i must find a school
to teach me the art
and give me the tools,
of how to deconstruct a wall.
with out the haphazard use
of a wrecking ball.
napwrimo day 24
prompt; write a poem of stonemasonary.
658 · Jul 2014
this is love
betterdays Jul 2014
the wind sings a song
of howling sadness today
catching at the corners of
the old teak farmhouse

as the sky cries in long
exclamation points
and puddles of loss
form on the ground...

we stay inside away
from the worlds pain
cocooned in warmth


the blucat a sleeping
hearth stone...
me making soup a
nd scones
to the sounds of my clan
the click of knitting needles and building blocks followed by demolition...and laughter

this is love.
this is easy,
everyday love.
under a grey and
brooding winter sky.
i am forever blessed by
simple days like this...
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