Both hands in her pockets
She stared toward her feet
As she walked away from the bus

Her dark hair
Parting in the breeze
As if to gesture to me
To breathe
Before hooking me
Delicately
In temptations
Tethering

As i tailed with inexplicable ease
It was all beyond me now

And with the park
Coming up on the left
I closed our distance
In a frantic persistence

Limited

Only by blind vigilance
Inhibiting
All else from
Existing

Her shadow
Emanating
Upon mine
Dimming
The light
Between us

Her scent intoxicating
Causing my blood to thin

My strength to diminish

So i sprinted in
And grabbed her throat
With one hand
Jerking her back
To my chest
The black
Pulling from her chest
As i stepped
Into our place
In time

And with a Pinch where
Thumb meets finger
I recite the loss to the letter

As i whisper her name into her ear

Pulling her nearer
To the darkness of the park
I punctured her heart
As she disgustedly starts

Struggling
Pumping
Her legs
Apart

Inside she begs
Attempting to pry
My hand away

As if to say
Don't stop

In lustful froth
I had found
The one
And none
Could stop
The sound

Of her silent shuttering

As i eased her to the ground
She weakened

Falling softly
Into love with me
Sinking into me
Serenading me
In weakening
Dreams
Drifting
From her being
And into me

My one moment
Of ecstasy
Was her infinite

But the park
Will always see
Will always taste
The iron soil
We have made

Beautifully

She stared blankly
Back at me
In the blackening
Of the light

Then the shakes began
And she lost all her fight

Loosening my hand
In the captured sight
Of first contact

As i gently laid her
On her back

Resting my lips
Upon her eyelids
I released my grip
To the fluttering
Upon my
Lips and
Kissed
Her

I'd seen that look before
As the ghost in the mirror
Smiled its haggard stare
I blinked and stepped away
From shock
Not blinded to the glare

So many nights of drinkers ale
To many spirits high
Had left my face a
Broken soul
My life a drunken fail
Yet I was me inside It all
A mess that's on the rails

This face that fell all from
It's grace
The beauty into beast
The wine of gods had done
As much
Sweet nectar has
Revealed  

My time to change had come about
The mirror scared my soul
The ghost that met my
Reddened eyes
Not welcome anymore
This road so long
The bends not straight
Let water be my wine
So one day ghost you fade away
One day
One day at a time

I am
breathless.
wordless.
my eyes attempt to take in
every little piece
of you.
They trace your edges.
Test them.
Dip into the shadows that your head
tilted down in shyness, nervousness, uncertainty mixed with certainty
casts across your neck
The ones that fade out as they reach for your chest
the same way i want to reach out and touch you
slide my hands gently across your skin
kiss you in places that i  never think I'd think to kiss you in
places i never imagined would curve so enticingly the way they did

I want arms
long enough to
reach out and pull you to me
until we share a
single
smoothe
edge.
I want you to
curve to my shape
I want to BE touched
and that fine line
is one I want you to brush your fingertips over
I'd relive it for pieces of forever.

Her name is Tiffany.

We met when

our orbits collided

                                  and crash landed,

on a wooden picnic table

                       in the dead of night.

I saw the world in her eyes—

and she had this spirit about her
       that made me want to follow
                her with an umbrella
                       the rest of my days
                             so she wouldn’t
                                    even be
                                      bothered
                                                by the rain.

I swore, I’d make her believe in                        h u m a n i t y.

Conversation, spit-balled from her lips like a machine gun

trigger stuck—

we tore through topics

                    like bullets tear through skin,

I tried my best to keep up.

We dead ended on the subject of children.
She grew silent, pale.

                      “I should be the mother of twins” she stammered.

I’ve been told I have quite the poker face, but in that moment

                                                                               I know she saw.

Turning her head as if to answer my unspoken question

“Miscarriage”
                        she breathed.

I spent the next however long soaking in her story, like a sponge.
I could tell,
                               she doesn’t do this often.

I have no respect for fathers who stain the honor of father
with a ******'s blood.

For boyfriends who can’t hear the word “No.”

over the sound of their
                                          d e s i r e.

These men painted her the color of smashed hymens.

On her wedding night,

she won’t forget.

She can’t give                                            what’s been stolen.

She finishes.
I exhale—breaking the silence first.

She looks at me, with all the innocence they must have stolen from her,

and i wonder

if she can

hear me

b r e a k


This, is the kind of story you read about.

I had no words to fix her— I couldn’t fix her.

All I knew was I wanted to sear my flesh and

m
   e
       l
         t

into the crevices of her broken self

and convince her

It will be okay.

“I swear, I’ll make you believe in
**h u m a n i t y.”