Barker: Poems

May 2018 · 139

Hero

Barker May 2018

Hero

Little did she know
That she didn’t need a hero
She was her own hero

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 215

Lock and Key

Barker May 2018

Lock and Key

She is still guarded
Because many thieves
Came in before you
And broke her trust
And vandalized her mind
She is still recovering
From those who had
Stolen her heart and mind

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 151

Pointless

Barker May 2018

Pointless

They buried me alive
And I dug my way out for you
But when I found you,
You were holding the heart of someone else

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 158

Crossroads

Barker May 2018

Crossroads

You’re standing in front of me,
Every nerve in my body is pulsing.
There is an invisible force that is pulling me towards you.
Where do I go from here?
We’ve done this before and I was left to bleed.
How do I turn around and choose myself over you,
When you are standing inches away from me.
You are everything I want but not everything I need.

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 194

Things that kill

Barker May 2018

Things that ****

You are everywhere but here and it’s killing me

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 231

Void

Barker May 2018

Void

My hands grasp at air,
While my lungs suffocate on the sound of your silence

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 1.2k

Art II

Barker May 2018

Art II

We fell in love,
Despite our differences
And once we did,
Something rare,
And beautiful was
Created

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 543

Her

Barker May 2018

Her

She reminds me of a cool summers breeze,
Or that feeling you get when you watch the sun set or rise.
She is the feeling of beauty and simplicity.
She is the feeling of awe and amazement that you get when you look into her eyes.
She is the air that I breath.
She is the feeling of joy when you dance around in the rain.
She is the fire that keeps you warm on a cold winter's day.
She is the very essence of my happiness,
And I love her with every piece of my heart, mind and soul.

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 178

Despair II

Barker May 2018

Despair II

It was during times where we would fight over the smallest thing,
That I knew I loved you,
Because at that time I wanted to scream and cry,
But I also wanted to wrap you up in a tight hug,
And whisper how much I love you

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 165

Love III

Barker May 2018

Love III

An invisible thread
Ties us together.

It is delicate,
Yet when treated
Properly it is strong.

It is the product
Of our
Emotions.

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 196

Balance

Barker May 2018

Balance

I am warm while you are cold.
I am rough while you are smooth.
That's our balance.

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 172

You VI

Barker May 2018

You VI

I will wait for you because honestly
I don't want anyone else

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 122

Want

Barker May 2018

Want

I'm amazed when I look at you
Not just because of your looks,
But because of the fact that everything I've ever wanted
Is right here in front of me

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 124

Everything

Barker May 2018

Everything

Maybe I'm scared
Because you mean
More to me
Than any other
Person.
You are everything
I think about,
Everything I need,
Everything I want,
And everything I love

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 116

World

Barker May 2018

World

To the world you may be someone,
But to someone you may be the world,
And you my darling are my world

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 122

Yours

Barker May 2018

Yours

While I'm off chasing my own dreams.
Sailing around the world,
Please know that
I'm yours
To keep

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 126

Voice II

Barker May 2018

Voice II

Remind me of your voice again so I can flush out the demons

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 814

For You II

Barker May 2018

For You II

I promise that one day I'll be around
I'll keep you safe
I'll keep you sound

Right now it's pretty crazy
And I don't know how to stop or slow it down

Hey
I know there are some things we need to talk about

And I can't stay
Just let me hold you for a little longer now

Take a piece of my heart
And make it all your own
So when we are apart

You'll never be alone
When you miss me close your eyes
I may be far but never gone

When you fall asleep tonight just remember that we lay under the same stars

So take a piece of my heart
And make it all your own
So when we are apart
You’ll never be alone

(c)ibarker not mine

May 2018 · 157

Within

Barker May 2018

Within

You are a magnificent piece of madness,
You are the sanity to my insanity,
You are the fire that burns so brightly within me

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 310

Cine?

Barker May 2018

Cine?

Are you mine?
No, you're not
I lost you quite a while ago

Am I yours?
No, I'm not
You lost me quite a while ago

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 239

You VII

Barker May 2018

You VII

I don’t know what to do

Maybe you were right

We shouldn’t have

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 163

Frankenstein

Barker May 2018

Frankenstein

You've caused me to become a demon,

I don't know what's wrong with me,

I just know that I don't care about anything anymore.

My feelings are as cold as ice,

What do you see when you look into my eyes?

Do you see hatred?

Or am I a stranger?

The old me is dead,

You've murdered me,

And now, I am your nightmare.

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 159

Memory

Barker May 2018

Memory

I may be bad at remembering things,
But I remember every wrong doing you've ever done to me.

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 162

Memories

Barker May 2018

Memories

I remember
Those many nights
Where I would just sit on the floor
And look up at the ceiling
My body would be cold to the touch
I was alone and lonely
Sitting in the dark
Tears slowly dripping
Down the side of my cheek

I remember
How empty I felt
And how life seemed to be pointless
How much pain and anger I kept inside
How in those moments
The only I thing I would wish for
Was to be dead

I remember that you weren't there for me

I remember how alone I was and how much I needed you

I remember

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 177

Let you down

Barker May 2018

Let you down

I guess I'm a disappointment,
I don't want to do anything to disappoint you,

I just didn't want me to be an issue for you.
I'm paranoid, what did I do wrong this time?

All these voices in my head get loud.
I wish I could shut them out.

I'm sorry that I
Let
You
Down

(c)ibarker NF

May 2018 · 155

You Know Who You are

Barker May 2018

You Know Who You are

You let me free,
Yet you keep me chained.
I don't know what I did to deserve this.

You let me fly,
But kept me on a leash.
So there was no where I could go.

Why do you tease me with
Bits of freedom,
Only to take it away from me?

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 120

Shield

Barker May 2018

Shield

You said you would protect me,
Yet you don't know what I am fighting.

I'm fighting someone smarter than me,
Someone who knows my every move.

I'm fighting someone who has known me longer than I have,
Someone who knows everything that is haunting me.

This "someone" I'm fighting is not someone you can protect me from,
Because how can you protect someone,
When the person they are fighting are themselves?

(c)ibarker

May 2018 · 166

Clock

Barker May 2018

Clock

Tick
Tock
Tick
Tock
Tick
Tock

I listen to the steady beat of the clock
I’m sitting on my bed
Starring into empty space

I never thought I would be the one
To hurt you

I keep listening to the clock
The sound soothes me

Until I hear them
Creeping under the door
They are surrounding me

I become paralyzed
They whisper words to me

I see them
They are haunting me

I can’t do this
I can’t live with this
What have I done?

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 140

The Sound of Death

Barker May 2018

The Sound of Death

A shot can be heard through
Followed by a thump

A boy’s lifeless body
Is laying on the floor
Limp

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 164

Home II

Barker May 2018

Home II

You looked at me
As if you'd die if
You lost me
And for the first time
I knew I was home

(c)ibarker Topher Kearby

May 2018 · 376

I'm Sorry

Barker May 2018

I'm Sorry

I broke your heart so carelessly
But made the pieces part of me
And now it hurts, what I've become
Because you taught me how to love
And it was me who taught you how to stop
I'm sorry for what I've done

(c)ibarker Nothing But Thieves

May 2018 · 127

Love II

Barker May 2018

Love II

Yes,
The people I love
Are a bit weird
A bit insane
And a bit strange
But I wouldn’t change it for the world.
Because to me,
They are the people I love and no matter how weird, strange, and insane they are, I will always love them.

(C)ibarker

May 2018 · 175

Here III

Barker May 2018

Here III

Here I am
Still in love with you.

And

There you are
Still doing you.

(C)ibarker

Apr 2018 · 120

Understand II

Barker Apr 2018

Understand II

You say you don’t understand what I see in you. My response is plain and simple as you. I see a girl desperately trying to find her voice. I see someone who has been through a lot. I see someone who doubts everything they do. I see someone who hates their body and themselves. I see you. And to me that’s everything. I see your smile. I see your laugh. I see your eyes and your freckles. I see what you are capable of. I see the potential you have to be something great. Sure, sometimes you are a bit of a mess, but that’s okay. Because I’m not looking for someone perfect. I’m looking for someone like you.

(c)ibarker

Apr 2018 · 122

Didn’t you?

Barker Apr 2018

Didn’t you?

Didn’t you promise that you wouldn’t get mad again?
Didn’t you promise that you weren’t going to punch me anymore?
Didn’t you promise that you wouldn’t ever throw things at me again?
Didn’t you promise that you would stop drinking?
Didn’t you promise that you wouldn’t fight with mom anymore?
Didn’t you promise that you wouldn’t ever lay another hand on mom?
Didn’t you promise?
Didn’t you?

(c)ibarker

Apr 2018 · 262

Mr. G

Barker Apr 2018

Mr. G

When you've got the blues
You play the blues
To get rid of the blues

An inspirational quote from my favourite teacher. You will be missed dearly.

#mrg #blues #play

Apr 2018 · 8.8k

Voices II

Barker Apr 2018

Voices II

Is it really worth it?
Does loving you out weigh the cons?
You mean everything to me.
But I have these voices in my head
Telling me it's wrong.
These voices make me second guess everything.
I don't know.
What if I'm doing something wrong?
What if you don't really love me?
What if I'm just fooling myself?
...
What if you're just playing with me?
I've had my heart played with before.
What if this is all just set up for heartbreak?
I can't withstand another break up.
What if?
...
These voices keep me up at night.
I can barely sleep.
Sometimes I don't sleep at all.
I just lay awake thinking of all the possibilities.
I can hear the voices telling me that you don't like me.
I can hear them saying things that I know aren't true.
But they make me doubt everything.
I don't know what the truth is anymore.
And that scares me.

(c)ibarker

#voices #help #depression #love #heartbreak #sleep

Apr 2018 · 217

Worth

Barker Apr 2018

Worth

I sometimes wonder whether it's all worth it.
If going through all this pain will end up paying off.
If all those nights spent worrying about things,
Will even matter in the end.
I don't know.

(c)ibarker

#worth #worry #end

Apr 2018 · 181

Break

Barker Apr 2018

Break

I'm standing here,
Gun in my hand.
The pain,
Is unbearable.
I need to take a break,
But that's the thing,
Life doesn't give breaks.

(c)ibarker

#break #depression

Apr 2018 · 142

Help

Barker Apr 2018

Help

I just feel so useless
You need someone who is better fit for this

I'm trying to help
Yet you are still hurting

I don't know if it's because I am not doing stuff right
Or if I am just not good enough

I really want to help you
But I get frustrated because you are still hurting

I feel hopeless
I get down because I don't know what to do

It's not your fault love
Just tell me what I can do

(c)ibarker

#hopeless #love

Apr 2018 · 179

Myss

Barker Apr 2018

Myss

I am at home.
And then the memory starts.

I remember you,
Your smile,
Your laugh,
Your eyes,
Your scars,
Your voice.

I miss you

I want to cuddle you
I want to tell you how much you mean to me
I want to kiss you and tell you how much I love you

And that makes me miss you even more

(c)ibarker

#love #kyss #miss

Apr 2018 · 122

Missing the Start

Barker Apr 2018

Missing the Start

When I was in my second relationship

I missed the feeling of being me
I missed the nights where I didn't have to worry about anyone except me
I missed the days where I could just isolate myself and read
I missed when I didn't have to be dependant on someone
I missed when I didn't have to tell anyone anything
I missed those moments

I started to lose hope in finding love

But you came around

I started to like the way you made me feel
I started to like feeling wanted
I started to like being with someone
I started to like telling you things
I started to like nights where we would just talk about our problems
I started to like the fact that I didn't have to be alone

And then I realized I was starting to fall in love

(c)ibarker

Apr 2018 · 199

Walking On Cars

Barker Apr 2018

Walking On Cars

If this is what you want
Then why didn't you say?

You didn't say goodbye
Now you've gone away.

I'll always be with you

Apr 2018 · 100

Pain III

Barker Apr 2018

Pain III

I stare at the pills in my hand.
I swallow them all down in one gulp.
I drink the cool water from the tap.
I wait.
And wait.
And wait.
Until there it is.
I feel it.
The pain blisters through me like lightning.
It starts in the pit of my stomach and spreads.
I double over in pain.
I want to cry out.
I want to scream.
But I can't.
I have no voice.
I just lay.
On the floor.
Whimpering in pain.

I pass out from the pain.
When I wake up.
I hear sirens.
Voices calling out my name.
Then my vision blurs.
And I am once again.
Engulfed in the darkness.
The sound of loud beeps.
Wakes me up.
And I realize.

I'm still here.

(c)ibarker

Apr 2018 · 112

You V

Barker Apr 2018

You V

Like a diamond
You are strong
You can conquer anything

Yet you are precious
You glimmer in the light
You make everyone around you sparkle

But you weren't always a diamond
You had to be put through your limits
You had to be tortured

You were forced every day to be put through immense pressure
You had to break and mend over and over again
Until one day you woke up

And you became
Something
More

(c)ibarker

Apr 2018 · 174

You IV

Barker Apr 2018

You IV

It breaks my heart to see you broken

I want to **** everyone who has done you wrong

You deserve more than this

All good people go through hard times

It's not fair that you are the one to get hurt

You mean so much to me

I don't understand why people hurt you

You are so precious

Like a diamond

(c)ibarker

Apr 2018 · 8.4k

Pain II

Barker Apr 2018

Pain II

I see you standing there
I can see the pain masked by a smile
I can see how broken you are

I want to help you
I want to make you feel wanted
I want to make you happy

But I don't know how
I don't know what to do
I don't know how to act

I wish I could help you
I want to help you
I can help you

I've been through this
I know how this works
I know how I got through this

Maybe I can heal those scars on your wrist
I just want you to open up
I need you to open up

I know that it is hard
I understand what this means
I might not understand completely

I can try to understand
I will understand
I just need you to trust me

Please
Let Me
Help You

Don't
Shut Me
Out

(c)ibarker

For the one who has my heart

#pain #help #i #wish #trust #scars

Apr 2018 · 181

Pain

Barker Apr 2018

Pain

The pain I feel
Is not the pain you get from physical injuries

The pain I feel
Is the pain that comes from within

It is the kind of pain that can destroy you
It is the emotional pain that turns physical

It is the beginning and the end
It is the in between

It lingers during the day
And is full blown at night

That is the kind of pain
That I feel

(c)ibarker

Apr 2018 · 997

Lessons on Love

Barker Apr 2018

Lessons on Love

You never know what you had until it is all gone.
You never know what you had until it falls apart.

But if you want love,
You're going to have to go through the pain

You never know what you had until it is all gone.
You never know what you had until it falls apart.

But if you want love,
You're going to have to learn how to change

You never know what you had until it is all gone.
You never know what you had until it falls apart.

But if you want love,
You're going to have to give some away

If you want love

(c)ibarker NF

#love #broken

Apr 2018 · 231

Barricades

Barker Apr 2018

Barricades

I built walls around my broken heart.
So no one can break it again.

I made barriers around my mind.
So no one can use my memories against me.

I sealed my emotions.
So no one can use my feelings as a weapon.

(c)ibarker