Dearest Darling,

I’m writing this for you because every ounce of breath you take is a representation of how many times you’ve taken my breath away. Although you may not see and I may be biased you are the greatest being that has every roamed these grounds in this generation. You are a magnificent piece of madness and I love you. Me being a hopeless romantic and a sentimentalist, doesn't mean that I’m good at expressing my fondness for you. I treasure every moment I have with you because these moments are the ones that bring me back to reality when my mind is clouded with darkness. You are the only one who truly knows me and hasn’t ran away. I am still amazed that you are still here with me. Hand in Hand, Heart to heart. It is just you, me versus the world. I will always be with you.. So, when the cold starts to come and you just need a place to be warm come on closer for it feels like home. I can’t wait for the experiences to come and the adventure that awaits us. It is funny how much I can miss you for I never deemed it possible until it happened. You have showed me how enjoyable life is. I used to think that I could get by in this world alone, but you showed me that it didn’t have to be that way. You showed me that together we are stronger. Onlookers will give us disgusting looks but we know that they are just jealous. I will always be here for you. You can put the blame on me and I will always forgive you, because I value our friendship more than the little actions that would be considered unacceptable and friendship breakers by others. I know that life treats you unfairly sometimes, but I will always stand by you. Even in your darkest hour. These words on this page do not even come close to justifying my feelings for you. These words are as perfectly imperfect as me and I hope that it is enough for I only have these words to trade for your love.

Kiss me hardy,
Merry Christmas!!!

Just breathe. You're okay. I'm here. Come back. It's over. You're okay. Wake up. You can do this. Just open your eyes. Come back to me. Please don't do this. Please wake up. I love you so much. Please come back to me. I can't do this without you. Please. Please. I'm begging you.

You’re standing in front of me,
Every nerve in my body is pulsing.
There is an invisible force that is pulling me towards you.
Where do I go from here?
We’ve done this before and I was left to bleed.
How do I turn around and choose myself over you,
When you are standing inches away from me.
You are everything I want but not everything I need.

You are everywhere but here and it’s killing me

My hands grasp at air,
While my lungs suffocate on the sound of your silence

She reminds me of a cool summers breeze,
Or that feeling you get when you watch the sun set or rise.
She is the feeling of beauty and simplicity.
She is the feeling of awe and amazement that you get when you look into her eyes.
She is the air that I breath.
She is the feeling of joy when you dance around in the rain.
She is the fire that keeps you warm on a cold winter's day.
She is the very essence of my happiness,
And I love her with every piece of my heart, mind and soul.

I am warm while you are cold.
I am rough while you are smooth.
That's our balance.

I will wait for you because honestly
I don't want anyone else

I'm amazed when I look at you
Not just because of your looks,
But because of the fact that everything I've ever wanted
Is right here in front of me

Maybe I'm scared
Because you mean
More to me
Than any other
Person.
You are everything
I think about,
Everything I need,
Everything I want,
And everything I love

To the world you may be someone,
But to someone you may be the world,
And you my darling are my world

Remind me of your voice again so I can flush out the demons

I promise that one day I'll be around
I'll keep you safe
I'll keep you sound

Right now it's pretty crazy
And I don't know how to stop or slow it down

Hey
I know there are some things we need to talk about

And I can't stay
Just let me hold you for a little longer now

Take a piece of my heart
And make it all your own
So when we are apart

You'll never be alone
When you miss me close your eyes
I may be far but never gone

When you fall asleep tonight just remember that we lay under the same stars

So take a piece of my heart
And make it all your own
So when we are apart
You’ll never be alone

Are you mine?
No, you're not
I lost you quite a while ago

Am I yours?
No, I'm not
You lost me quite a while ago

I don’t know what to do

Maybe you were right

We shouldn’t have

You've caused me to become a demon,

I don't know what's wrong with me,

I just know that I don't care about anything anymore.

My feelings are as cold as ice,

What do you see when you look into my eyes?

Do you see hatred?

Or am I a stranger?

The old me is dead,

You've murdered me,

And now, I am your nightmare.

I guess I'm a disappointment,
I don't want to do anything to disappoint you,

I just didn't want me to be an issue for you.
I'm paranoid, what did I do wrong this time?

All these voices in my head get loud.
I wish I could shut them out.

I'm sorry that I
Let
You
Down

Tick
Tock
Tick
Tock
Tick
Tock

I listen to the steady beat of the clock
I’m sitting on my bed
Starring into empty space

I never thought I would be the one
To hurt you

I keep listening to the clock
The sound soothes me

Until I hear them
Creeping under the door
They are surrounding me

I become paralyzed
They whisper words to me

I see them
They are haunting me

I can’t do this
I can’t live with this
What have I done?

A shot can be heard through
Followed by a thump

A boy’s lifeless body
Is laying on the floor
Limp

I broke your heart so carelessly
But made the pieces part of me
And now it hurts, what I've become
Because you taught me how to love
And it was me who taught you how to stop
I'm sorry for what I've done

Yes,
The people I love
Are a bit weird
  A bit insane
   And a bit strange
But I wouldn’t change it for the world.
Because to me,
They are the people I love and no matter how weird, strange, and insane they are, I will always love them.

Here I am
Still in love with you.

And

There you are
Still doing you.

You say you don’t understand what I see in you. My response is plain and simple as you. I see a girl desperately trying to find her voice. I see someone who has been through a lot. I see someone who doubts everything they do. I see someone who hates their body and themselves. I see you. And to me that’s everything. I see your smile. I see your laugh. I see your eyes and your freckles. I see what you are capable of. I see the potential you have to be something great. Sure, sometimes you are a bit of a mess, but that’s okay. Because I’m not looking for someone perfect. I’m looking for someone like you.

Didn’t you promise that you wouldn’t get mad again?
Didn’t you promise that you weren’t going to punch me anymore?
Didn’t you promise that you wouldn’t ever throw things at me again?
Didn’t you promise that you would stop drinking?
Didn’t you promise that you wouldn’t fight with mom anymore?
Didn’t you promise that you wouldn’t ever lay another hand on mom?
Didn’t you promise?
Didn’t you?