Barker

Jul 2018

Ksenia

Darling,

I'm in love with you.
And I can't sleep because I am mourning for us.
You will leave,
You have no choice.
I will stay...
But we could have had such a great life together.
Oh darling can you imagine?
Waking up to each other every morning and falling asleep tangled into one, as the moon bathed us in her shimmering light.
Promising to stay by each other's side till death finally caught on to us, realising that our happiness is far too good to be true.
Darling, there is so much to say, but no words to say it with.
Can't we figure this out?
Is there really no other way?
Darling I love you.

Barker Jul 2018

The Moon Sends You My Love

I just had a vision. 3 years from now, one late night at my university campus, I look out the window to see the moon.
I ask the moon to send a message from me to you saying,
"I love you and I miss you."
And I know that wherever you are, you'll look at the moon and hear my message. We'll spend the night having a conversation through the moon and I'll make a wish, just like Brendon Urie once said,
"Hey moon, please forget to fall down. Hey moon, don't you go down."

(c)ibarker

Barker Jul 2018

The Song We Made For Us

We dance in the street with no music,
But we listen to the same song in our minds.
It's our song,
The one that we made with our love.
Our hearts beats in sync,
Our body is lost in the flow of the rhythm.

(c)ibarker

Jul 2018

Ksenia

Darling, you are NOT flawed

Darling,

I will never be able to completely comprehend the magnitude of your suffering.

Unfortunately I can not change your past.

And I know this is an annoying notion,
but your past has shaped you into who you are today.

But darling,

I promise to love every part of you and do my best to treat you the way you should have been treated your whole life.

A beautiful soul like you deserves to be worshiped.

Barker Jul 2018

Understanding the depth

I like you not just because you're pretty and smart,
But because you understand me
And what I'm going through.
We have had similar experiences
And you understand my diagnosis more than me.
Despite all my flaws, you still accept me for who I am
And that's more than I could ever ask for.

(c)ibarker

Barker Jul 2018

You don't

I don't think you know the extent of how much harm my ex has caused me
And how much she haunts me.
She caused me so much mental and emotional pain
And I have so much PTSD from that relationship.
I don't think you know how scarred I am from that relationship.
Even the slightest thing can cause memories to flash through my mind.
Simple things such as watching Tv, eating food in front of people causes me so much anxiety.
I don't think you understand.

No, wait, I know you don't understand.

(c)ibarker

Barker Jul 2018

Pain IV

You don’t get a say in whether you’ll be hurt in love,
But you do have a say in who will hurt you.
So, darling, hurt me.

(C)ibarker