the mushroom may
grow next to
other mushrooms
but not on top of them.

Two may decide
to grow along side
one another.
they may lean
so close that
it seems their
base is one,
but still each
stands level but
seperate on the
same ground.

look even closer
and the individual
mushroom is, itself,
a relationship of its own.

each mushroom,
from stem to cap,
is a population of
individual and free
single celled organisms
who bond together
for strength and structure,
to abet the survival of all.

really puts the
human condition
in perspective.

he was walking lazily
along a cliff, when he slipped
and as his side hit the cliffside
his hand found a tree

but she was young
and he wondered
if her roots would hold

i used to burn all my bridges
and let other people
regret it for me.

now I just let things slip away
like pennies in deep waters
and it's passionless
and it's dull.

i watched a
seagull catch a fish
out of chicago's river.

fish about
half the size of the bird,
   dancing head to beak.
    i stood on the bridge
and waited for the ****
to choke.
he didn't.

my pyrex measuring cup
says patent pending
on the side of it.
what the **** are
they waiting for?

what
the ****
          am i
waiting for?

life's no good when
you're comfortable.
happy or miserable,
  if you're used to it,
          you're ******.

it's only living
        just after the
globes been shook.
just before it all settles.

Pull the cord.
Click click.
Plunge into night.

Next-door’s light is oil on a puddle
through the dappled window -
bubbles on brown tiles.

Folded towels on toilet lid,
clothes crumpled on lino.
Skin pricked in frozen air.

Knotted hair falls,
shoulders lower into the tank,
steam rising from cold tin.

A baptism - of sorts.
Astreamofbreath.
Open mouth, choked,

soaked in this womb,
this tiny ocean.
Lungs searing,

eyes stinging,
light specks dart.
Water’s skin unbroken.

I'm a little bit damaged,
Of this I wont dare lie.
I was a broken heart held together with glue,
A soul of unquestionably biased pride.
I never pictured happiness,
Until the day I met you.
I never dreamed of stability,
It seemed far fetched,
Too good to be true.
I can be a little bit crazy,
And this,
A **** poor excuse,
But true to my word I just never knew any better.
It's the only path I ever knew.
My trust may sometimes fade,
And my words sometimes harsh and rude.
I'm by no means a perfect person,
Even if I try to be for you.
I do want you to know that I want to be what you need,
The girl that's strong,
The woman that supports you through and through.
I don't want to imagine a life,
That exists without you.
I'm sorry you've seen those pieces,
The ones that I tried to hide.
I'm sorry you saw the emotions,
The ones I forgot existed inside.
You make me smile,
You make me feel complete,
You make my heart melt,
Your kisses are pure ecstasy.
And I know sometimes it may not seem true,
But baby I really, honestly am so in love with you.

I'll be a tree, if you are its flower,
Or a flower, if you are the dew-
I'll be the dew, if you are the sunbeam,
Only to be united with you.

My lovely girl, if you are the Heaven,
I shall be a star above on high;
My darling, if you are hell-fire,
To unite us, ****** I shall die.

Fizzy bubbly brown coke
Filling the crystal glass
You’d never know what’s in it
‘till the last sip had passed

It tastes quite peculiar
In fact it’s oddly strange
You’ll never know what’***** you
Never know just how deranged

I bet it tastes delicious
Spectacular indeed
Cyanide is your last drink
For he who back stabs me

as i do another line
i can't help but picture
all the nights that i spent
up with my eyes wide shut
and i know that you're in his arms
tonight and you couldn't even
lie to me about the truth
tonight i'm going to dance with you
girlie girl you got to watch
what you do cause how many
cigarettes i smoke will never
make me forget your eyes
i spent tonight with molly
while this warmth on my skin
never goes more deep
than the smile on my lips
that never quite reaches
the stars that i told you were
always in our reach
and i'm grasping at straws
while you never spend
the night alone and here i sit
with nothing but my thoughts
and a band playing a catchy tune
i love you dear
and this is my 100th time writing this song
while my heart falls to pieces
in the most tragic of ways
you're all elegance and klonopin
and i'm just a wreck that will
always come back for another
round of pain
you're my high darling
as much as i want to quit
you slip into my veins
and leave with my flesh
and my fingers in my brain
scratch out my memories

i want to scream till i puke and cry myself empty
because my mind is a dark place and the thoughts
that haunt me are half formed and sadistic
they wrap my mind so tight in these chains
that i feel like the breath is crushed right out of me
and my ribcage is cracking my shoulders are breaking
and my eyes have been replaced with
cold black stone.. i thought i was made of flesh and blood
but apparently i'm just carved out of metal and bone