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I once felt love,
True love in detail
The kind that people act out,
Pretend/believe/desire/crave/hope to be in.
She would wait for me,
Legs open, mouth dripping.
Infatuated by my scent,
Moist to my touch.
We were divine in movement,
Excelling in performance.
A state of euphoria found only in Eden.

Now she’s with another—simple as that.
It was his concluding gaze.
Enclosed by persons
Why would he choose me?
Choose to leave me scarred
A brand I've not once elapsed.
I never knew his name,
Never stayed to see what became of him.
I know he died that night,
Bled out like a pig on the cement.
He looked at me to save him,
But I ran.
A  c o w a r d too frightened to help a stranger.
I've not, not ever not told anyone,
Of these eyes that haunt me,
Of this night that plagues my wakefulness.
To see him pricked four whiles,
Punctured over babble.
I hate him for what he did.
Blaming me with concluding eyes.
Moons ago I smoked till the filter,
Drank Johnny’s backwash
And slept hungry.
How can you know an empty stomach,
Without dancing in Tampa for a buck fifty?
What’s for breakfast?
“cowboy killers.”
lunch I asked,
“Kentucky deluxe.”
Dinner?
“A bent Porto Rican kitten.”
But people are seasons
And springtime had come.
Now it’s easy, but still stiff.
In the end of the day.
ehh.
Be polite when clothed,
violent when naked.
smoke till it hurts
drink till you cough
And dance with an eye closed.
Then
Seek happiness but don’t keep it.
When it’s gone,
Then
Start from step one.
They all ran,
They couldn't run fast enough.
They all fell,
collapsing with death in their veins and the departure of their souls.
Life oozing out of their bodies,
all of them lay in their own blood face down.
Body bag by body bag,
I saw the lives I had taken,
the people I had shaken.
Blood was painted like a canvas across white walls.
It was beautiful to my sick and morbid ways.
I had to ****,
I want to **** always.
The smell of death in the air,
nothing sweeter.
Nothing more to make you feel alive.
Slit the throats of the breathing,
Annihilate who is left.
  **** myself after.
This about a dream I had.
You never told me your wish
so I do wonder
if I am making it come true

scavenge for your sweet hands
pin them, bite the freckles
off

I do not just want you
inside of me
I want to digest you and

be
what you want.

The blonde rain
little daisies from angels say
you love me, love me not

you love me like a stone
we did not skip
but sheltered in a wooden box

with
plastic holes as skylights.
Electronic sound waves that I hear,
overwhelming base lines,
to my head from my ear.
Reverberant drum patterns and unique designs.
Some of this music may make you tear,
others make you see the sun's shines.
140bpm, it's very clear.
Emotions combines,
the drop is near.
Listen how it divines.
To let yourself go,
find a meaning of your own.
Feel the music flow,
as your mind is blown.
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