"You make me want to slit my wrists and play in my own blood."

It was the like room was filling with smoke and my eyes were burning while breathing became harder

I cannot knock on the door
or ask for extra napkins
I cannot call you and ask how you are
I cannot raise my hand without the fear of being wrong
I cannot hang out with new people
I cannot live my life
It is like being in a cage that is unlocked
I can get out but I have trapped myself
It is like wanting to have friends but cannot hang out
It is like suffocating but I am still breathing
It is not a way to live
It is a way to die

What if you slept
And what if
In your sleep
You dreamed
And what if
In your dream
You went to Heaven
And there you plucked a strange and beautiful flower
And what if
When you awoke
You had that flower in your hand
What then?

Tick tock goes the clock
And what now shall we play?
Tick tock goes the clock
Now summer's gone away?
Tick tock goes the clock
And what then shall we see?
Tick tock until the day
That thou shalt marry me
Tick tock goes the clock
And all the years they fly
Tick tock and all too soon
You and I must die
Tick tock goes the clock
He cradled her and rocked her
Tick tock goes the clock
Even for the Doctor...

I could be mean
I could be angry
You know I could be just like you
I could be fake
I could stupid
You know I could be just like you

You thought you were standing beside me
You were only in my way
You're wrong if you think that I'll be just like you

You thought you were there to guide me
You were only in my way
You're wrong if you think that I'll be just like you

I could be cold
I could be ruthless
You know I could be just like you
I could be weak
I could be senseless
You know I could be just like you

You thought you were standing beside me
You were only in my way
You're wrong if you think that I'll be just like you

You thought you were there to guide me
You were only in my way
You're wrong if you think that I'll be just like you

On my own
Cause I can't take living with you
I'm alone
So I won't turn out like you want me to

You thought you were standing beside me
You were only in my way
You're wrong if you think that I'll be just like you

You thought you were there to guide me
You were only in my way
You're wrong if you think that I'll be just like you

I could be mean
I could be angry
You know I could be just like you

I never felt so dead and alone
As woods were bare and birds had flown,
Hate filled this sweet and quiet eye
As I stare this anger towards the sky,
I dream the hour of death draws near
But childrens laughter rings my ear,
Hope starts blooming in my heart
So I'll look to heaven as I depart...

The topography of my mind
Maps the beach at changing tide.

From low to high it's all washed clean
Footprints, castles and trails alike
Unetched slate of flat leveled sand
Grains aligned by blessed wave strike.

From high to low it's all exposed
Fragments, jetsam, seaweed entwined
Littered, scattered on shore amuck
The sting of empty shells combined.

Yes, the topography of my mind
Maps the beach at changing tide
From low to high and high to low
A gloriously exhausting ride.