never once did i think

never once did i notice

never once did it cross my mind

not once did i think i was crazy

you wanna know what's really crazy?

the amount of wicked on this earth, the amount of pain a child can endure, the amount of suffering animals are brought upon, the sheer destruction of my beautiful mother earth, race on race terrization

but when i feel i want to be alone or lie in the bed with the covers over my head for days on end, when i cry or flip out over small things, when i let people in just to hurt them, when i choose not to go to church, but talk about the demons i've seen
their is something wrong with me

that's what's crazy

the lady that comes when i leave

what is her name?

the lady that laughs at nothing and makes no sense when she speaks

who is she again?

the lady that looks lost and sad,
weeps all day and night,

no one can hear her
her appearance is ghostly

sometimes we meet
in the middle of the night

she tells me about the calls death gives her,
the pain she is in not just awoke but sleep,

she shows me what she dreams about,
in her favorite she's all alone naked and free,
only love to surround her
no demons, just creation

she told me i kept her here, so i apologized
so she apologized to me for all the times she tried to leave not yet asked if i'm ready to go

To the beauty that resides in the soul
and conscious taking form in this human body,
To the light that claims who you are,
special in every way,
who do you want to be?
what are your desires?
what do you wish to create?
you are free

i was flying in between the clouds and the moon all while mother nature whispered something so sweet and serene into my ear

the goddess told me i was her favorite angel to ever walk her sacred body, i was the most heavenly being she ever had the pleasure of sharing herself with

she loved the way i connected to her so gracefully,
allowed the her trees to whisper intelligence into my body
allowed her winds to move me,
my mimicking of the oceans
how i watered and nurtured her seeds

the beautiful goddess herself thought i was special
and that alone was like heaven to me

Away is where I live,
I wish I was further,
unconscious,
non - existent,
dead.

From all death comes creation,
energy transformed and re-birthed,
chance multiplied by more chance,
love becoming a greater love,
and you a stronger soul