Sometimes I feel
I should be dead.
The fact that everyone hates me
is still in my head.

Sometimes I feel
I should just live.
Ignore the hatred
in me, I should believe.

Sometimes I feel
I should not write.
Hatred in comments
it does not feel alright.

Sometimes I feel
I should just write.
Ignore the hatred
I can win this fight.

I love to love the one who loves me.
I hate to hate the one who hates me.
But what do you see?
Is it love?
Is hate?
Or, Is it just me?

My heart starts to beat when I see you.
I woke up from sleep but I feel you.
But what do you feel?
Is this a dream?
Is this real?
Or, Is it just me?

I am a nobody.
I dont feel like anybody.
I have nothing to live for.
I live in a Netherworld.

A world where dead lives.
A place where death spreads.
A home where no one forgives.
A heart from which blood sheds.

Before the day dissolves in night.
Before the dark evolves from light.
Before I live to die next time.
Before I die for one more time.

I need to know.
I need to know who I am.
I need to know my purpose.
I need to be different.

I am not afraid.
because I am alone.
People die one day and will be gone.
I say to me nothing is permanent
if u wish, you can also be The President.

President of  the United States of America.
I said but my friends laughed at me.
Even my beloved sister Erika.
They say I am out of meds.
Told me to always stay in my bed.
I feel pain.
But...
they say I am insane.
And I kept chanting
'Without pain, nothing you can gain'

I go outside to the park.
I watch people pass by.
Till it gets dark
I sit there watching all.
This world is very big.
I am too small.

I believe in god
He will make things all right.
My dreams will no longer be dreams
It will come true.
what else is life for.

I don't wanna know who is in that ambulance.
He or she; Life or death.
I just don't wanna know.
Let it happen the way it's meant to happen.
I think I should stop thinking about that.
Come on! Just stop thinking about it.

It's different
when you know your life is about to end.
To an unknown place, you'll be sent.
There is no coming back.

It's a one-way trip.
When you're going to take your last sip
you know, this one you cannot skip
because you're not coming back.

This time, you are not coming back.
*

You should not picture yourself in that seat.
You should not keep thinking about it.
Let it go; People die, people live.
Just let it go.
You should stop thinking about that.
Come on! Just stop thinking about it.

You already left a lot of things undone.
You cannot go back to square one.
You were rich or poor but now you're none.
A legacy or a debt- Both are for your son.

You should not feel sad because you're going.
You don't know how you felt when you came here.
You were crying. Was it tears of sadness or tears of joy?
No one knows but all did it- every girl and boy.

You were here to live your life.

Once I was filled with greed.
I thought money is everything we need.
I thought it will help me succeed.
Oh, **** my creed.
Now I am living like a dead.
Till yesterday
Money was the only thing in my head.
When they are inside of me, they breed.
They filled my mind with greed.
They became the color of my blood.
And now when I bleed
I see these crazy thoughts that need to be freed.
I needed to escape from this deadly ****.
So I rushed towards the door at full speed.
I pushed the **** to open the door.
From the other side, it was locked.
I tried a few times more.
But it stayed locked.
More than a thousand times I knocked.
It did not open.
But my heart it woken.
My heart is the key, I realized it that moment.
And the door opened without a key.
No more I'm living just to make money.
Now I see the world more clearly.
So I decided
A good human being I'm going to be.
And the very next moment I met the real me.
He was the one who locked the door from inside.
Now he is free.
No more he needs to hide.

let me tell you a story...

There was this little girl..
who lived in her own dreams..
sometimes she smiled...
but no one saw her dimples..
because.. there were no dimples...
because.. no one saw her smile..
no one saw how beautiful her heart was...
she was in some wonderland...
she wanted to runaway from there..

There was this little boy..
who dreamed of himself a hero..
he lived in his comic books..
a world that seemed real...
he goes from place to place...
from Gotham city to even Krypton..
he can run..he can fly..
he lived without a mask in his face...

There was this small town...
far away from street racers and hookers..
a small town..where...
everyone knew everyone..
people meet each other
and greet each other..
a town full of love and no hatred...
a town where nothing was complicated..

Time is time..it went on and on..
this little girl thought about this boy..
and this boy thought about this girl
neither the girl met the boy..
nor the boy met the girl...
and town remained the same town...
nothing changed.....
and that persistence is known as life..
because...
lives end but.. life has no end.

Everyone deserves a second chance
but not everyone gets it.
And those who get it
flip it in the air...like a coin
and lose it.

Heads or tails.
that's our call.
We decide, then the coin falls
down and down and down.

But life is not a coin flipped in the air.
It's a journey to somewhere.
A place where you can sit and relax.
No future or past
Or a day to relapse.

So you don't need to pack your bags
cause you are already traveling.
and you're not gonna keep a track of it
cause you don't know
how you are unraveling.

And one day you will reach that place
you will meet your end face to face.
And that part of life is known as death
you are long dead by then.
Take a breath.

take a look back at your own life....
what do you see...?
you see all people you love....
are they acting like they miss you..?
look at them...now.

Some think of you.
some won't.
Some don't love you,
still, they don't.
In few days, they will forget you.
that's the way a human mind is set.
For all the people you met.
You are now a memory to forget.

So take a look back at your life right now
Journey is not over yet.
Tell me
What do you see...?